Aibu to cry because my toddler doesn't want me :(

[JeuxDEnfants]

We are on holiday at the moment and my 3 yr old keeps saying he only wants daddy and doesn't want mummy. Keeps telling me to go away. I know this is probably par for the course but it hurts... Not looking forward to the day he inevitably tells me he hates me. I guess it's because I'm the main carer and the one who mainly disciplines him. How should I handle it? After going away and sobbing into my tea :(

X post - Oh yes. You end up feeling you are only there for the discipline and the crap.

Thanks, will take a look at the book. Tomorrow is a new day... I think I said that yesterday too :)

Yep - one day at a time. And then one day you'll realise they are back all over you like a rash

You're right... It's possible he does just want one on one time with DH. He gets a lot with me but DH works. Makes total sense. I think I've returned to my serene self. Thanks :)

I cease to exist when Daddy is around - it's brilliant, I can slope off for a bath/read/walk without being interrupted! Learn to enjoy the break

When he says he hates you
Give yourself an enormous pat on the back
It shows that you have made your child so secure in their environment that they can say WHATEVER they want and KNOW they are still loved

I cried when DD said it to me until my mum explained the above
It would be far more worrying if they DIDNT feel secure enough to say it
Hugs

they do this. it's cheeky of them. they're pushing boundaries.

tell him firmly everyone is loved equally in your family.
remind him that you love him, that it is cruel to tell family members you don't love them, and that you all love each other just as much. get his dad to correct him if he is unpleasant about you - dad can remind him how much he loves you...

Thanks everyone...I can see I was being a bit irrational and over sensitive :)

I'm loving it. DD just 20 mo has decided that her prior plan, of screaming like she was being murdered every time I left the room, wasn't working for her. Now it is all Dad Dad and hugs for him and kisses.

Great, he is moving onto doing bedtime tonight and he did bath last night.

Mwahahaha.

You're right mrsTerryPratchett :)

Love mn for things like this... Little wobbles can be so quickly allayed :). Appreciated.

DS has only ever been devoted to me but there's only me around so he has no choice haha! (His dad is a loser!)

JeuxDEnfants, glad you're feeling better

Our DS is the same. When he was very little, he wanted me all the time and wouldn't settle with his daddy at all. DH felt useless, like he was just there to earn the money, and had no quality time with his son at all. He kept saying that he couldn't compete because he didn't have breasts but I kept telling him, "Your time will come, one day DS will tell me to go away because he wants to be with you instead". It was so true!!

The other day (after weeks and months of saying "Mummy go away, I don't want you, I want Daddy"), there was a wonderful moment when DS aged 3 put his arms around me and said, "Mummy I do love you all of the time". I nearly cried with happiness

Nothing can take away from the relationship a little boy has with his mummy. It's great that your DS has such a good relationship with his daddy too.