I'm going to try to keep this rather complicated problem as simple as possible, so here goes. My sister has been seeing her partner for less than a year, after calling off a wedding with her previous partner a year earleir. She and her current partner moved in together quite quickly, which I voiced my concerns about but supported her decision. He seemed like a nice bloke, down to earth, looked out for her, and she appeared very happy. There was always something about him though, that I couldn't put my finger on and some other family members mentioned it too.
Anyway, I got a phonecall from her at 2 o clock in the morning about 3 weeks ago. She was in hysterics, crying down the phone and I instantly thought something awful had happened to her partner. HOWEVER, I eventually got it out of her that they had been out drinking, got back home and had an argument. She stormed upstairs screaming in frustration and kicked the bedroom door (very out of character for her). So her partner comes into the room, shouts at her to calm down and the next thing she knows he has his hands around her throat, pinning her to the bed. She said she was in such shock she couldn't move. It was only when she started to try to tell him that she couldn't breathe that he realeased her. After that she phoned me. She was absolutely terrified, so needless to say I went and collected her straight away. She was so upset, couldn't stop crying . We talked for about an hour when we got back to mine and she told me about a drink problem he has and how he gets argumentative and paranoid when drunk, trust issues to mention just a few. She was adament that it was over. The more I listened, the more happy I was with this decision. So I brought her home the next day to deliver the news. I waited in the car just incase alything else happened but she came out a minute later and sent me home. She stayed there that night-even though I begged her to stay with me.
The next day she met with me and told me that they had talked things through. He didn't even say sorry for what he had done. His response was "What, so it's all my fault now? I just tried to restrain you to calm you down. I reached for your arms but missed" !! WTF? Anyway, yadda, yadda, I can't imagine my life without him, we're going to give it a try, I wound him up, we're not going to drink that much again. I told her I thought she was in a destructive relationship and that I wanted nothing to do with him. She asked me not to tell other family members. It is only now getting tricky because we are both being invited to my sisters birthday meal with our partners. I have told her that I don't want to see him. I just can't ring myself to forgive him like she has. So, aibu? Should I just support her decision and pretend that nothing has happened? He has texted me now too asking to meet so we can "clear the air". My stomach does somersaults when I think about even seeing him.
Okay, that was a bit of a ramble, sorry. I would appreciate your opinions/experiences though xxx