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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to ask about dd drinking in a restaurant?

103 replies

minikimmi · 29/08/2012 22:00

My dd is 17 and as a family we occasionally have wine with dinner or a couple of glasses on a Sat night watching x factor or whatever. Today was my d's first day of college. Afterwards I met her in town and we went to a Wetherspoons for a bite to eat. I ordered a carafe of wine and 2 glasses, as a wee bit of a celebration really. Halfway through the meal a bartender came over and asked d for id. I explained right away that she was 17 but I was her mum and I was ok with it. He said that no, she couldn't drink in there and we'd have to leave. Tonight there has been much debate in the house about this. I was CONVINCED that 16 yo could drink wine or cider in a restaurant if accompanied by an adult? I can't for the life of me remember where I heard this though. Any restaurateurs around to clarify?

OP posts:

TastesLikePanda · 29/08/2012 22:32

I had a great night in a Wetherspoons in Plymouth a few years back... the night of the Fireworks championships so there were loads of families around, looking for somewhere to eat...

At the time, the management hadn't realised how busy it would be and the fact that it would be all families - so they refused to let any children in after 6pm. Which was a little bit of a shame - but the funny bit was listening to people trying to persuade them to change their minds... 'My child will go hungry thanks to you' and 'what if he (approx 5 years old!) orders from the adults menu?' were both sentances that made me howl with laughter!

IvanaNap · 29/08/2012 22:49

I am not understanding how, if they queried her age, they didn't ask when serving?!

Screw complaining, report them for serving an underage person you could have been an undercover officer of something or other...

bakerbakerfairycaker · 29/08/2012 22:59

I got asked for ID in Wetherspoons buying 2 breakfasts an orange juice and a coffee at 10am, apparently without ID I wasn't allowed to buy ANYTHING.

Luckily I had mine with me.

Original poster

minikimmi · 30/08/2012 00:02

Canny be bothered complaining, just wanted to clear it up really because DP was totally unsympathetic to my rage when I got in.

OP posts:

dottyspotty2 · 30/08/2012 00:11

Wetherspoons are uber strict went for a meal in our local one a few months ago with my cousin and DD2 aged 16 and he was asked if she was over 18 as we where sat in the booths opposite the bar we where asked to move to the 'family' area

BertieBotts · 30/08/2012 00:16

I've been IDed in wetherspoons for coffee too!

I think sometimes it's to do with licencing. It wasn't wetherspoons but I went into a pub with my sister when I was 18 and she was 15, ordered her a coke, but they wouldn't let her in at all due to their licence.

Mspontipine · 30/08/2012 00:22

and porter - you can drink porter too iirc :)

futureunkown · 30/08/2012 01:00

porter?

futureunkown · 30/08/2012 01:01

Mspontipine have you had a few porters?

piprabbit · 30/08/2012 01:05

I thought that licensees had the right to refuse to serve alcohol to whoever they wanted to - although I may have imagined it.

GiserableMitt · 30/08/2012 01:14

O/T but I was buying wine in Walmart in the US recently and as the bottle was scanned the till display read "Is customer under 40?"

WTF, 40?????

bastard cashier didn't ask, just selected NO

StuntGirl · 30/08/2012 01:15

It depends on the establishment. My pub serves food during the day but we still couldn't allow an under 18 to drink alcohol even with a meal. That was just the rules of the pub.

Aaand we would have to ask you to leave if someone in your party was underage and drinking. If you complained at wasting your money the manager might refund it as a gesture of goodwill, but basically no member if staff wants to lose their job and have a possible conviction for serving someone underage. Tis very serious business these days.

StuntGirl · 30/08/2012 01:15

of staff.

Binfullofmaggotsonthe45 · 30/08/2012 01:16

Does the "two drink" max cover two bottles of wine and a straw?

Naoko · 30/08/2012 01:24

Spoons are nuts about ID, they threw myself and 5 friends out for not having ID when we went in to order food. It was only about 7pm, we were all 23 or over, and oddly enough, seeing as we'd gone out for chips send a burger rather than a pub crawl, none of us had brought our passports. Weirdos. I can just about understand them refusing to serve people with children enough alcohol to get them drunk or not wanting to risk getting done for serving an underage person, but what can they possibly achieve by refusing an all adult group food?

NoComet · 30/08/2012 01:44

Weather spoons is a dump!
And no I can't be bothered to correct that

toomuchmonthatendofthemoney · 30/08/2012 10:11

gumby has it right, Wetherspoons don't seem to know what they want to be, a family restaurant, a pub, a meet up and have a coffee place - they want to be all things to all people to make as much money as poss but then problems like this arise.

I think they should have very clear notices up on the doors as you go in so you can see what the rules are in each one, as it seems they all have their own ideas on who they will and won't serve, when, and for what!!

Agree OP you will have many brownie points now for giving you DD an excellent story to tell her mates, well done

PicklesThePottyMouthedParrot · 30/08/2012 10:15

I went to wetherspoons for breakfast the other week (nice and only 2.99)

The pub at 10 am was rammed full of people drinking pint after pint, I couldn't get a seat!

I find them funny places.

But the are fine when you want a cheap and cheerful nosh.

Mrsjay · 30/08/2012 10:19

I was under the impression that they could drink cider or beer with a meal under 18 and maybe at 16 we were out with dd for her 18th birthday meal and she was ID she did order a jug of cocktail though

FutTheShuckUp · 30/08/2012 10:28

A posh Wetherspoons?????
The only one I've been in that's been anything other than scummy was the one in Chichester

seaweedhead · 30/08/2012 10:37

I think the thing with Wetherspoons is, because their prices are pretty low, they do attract people who want to sit and get pissed all afternoon. And if they've got children with them that's not a great idea. Agree that its a bit nannying to tell people how many drinks they can have with a meal, but then some people need nannying.

If I wanted to share a bottle of wine with a teenager I'd probably take them to a proper restaurant. Pubs are kind forced to be over zealous because if they put a foot wrong they're in big trouble.

notcitrus · 30/08/2012 11:48

At least in the 90s, pubs could refuse to serve whoever they liked, but what they coudn't do was try to stop you drinking your alcohol after you'd paid for it - a college friend of mine had a condition where despite being 19 he hadn't gone through puberty and looked like a 12-year-old. So he'd go to the pub armed with passport and consultant letter, get served eventually, and half the time a landlord would then come out and try to take his drink away - at which point he'd thwap them with a copy of relevant legislation, threaten legal action, and then they'd compromise on some free drinks for him and all his friends (so obviously we encouraged him to do this quite a lot!)

Pinkmoon84 · 30/08/2012 11:57

I think Wetherspoons are particularly picky about this though... When I was at uni, we used it as a meeting point for a night out. As it was a course night out, there were quite a few of us and you'd think they'd want the business in a quiet Tuesday evening, but they threw us all out (despite the fact that most of us had successfully purchased alcohol at this point) as one member of the group didn't have ID. Problem was, he wasn't even allowed to buy a soft drink. They were rather unreasonable about it!

Viviennemary · 30/08/2012 11:59

I thought the rules was wine with meal OK. Can't remember what age from but definitely under 18.

toboldlygo · 30/08/2012 12:32

Those saying complain, it's the law.... it depends on the manager or owner's discretion. I work in a hotel with separate bar/pub, restaurant and lounge areas and we have a blanket policy of no alcohol for under 18s, regardless of having a meal/being accompanied etc. Technically speaking we can choose not to serve anyone for any reason.

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