Not to want to kiss grown up DCs' friends on first acquaintance.

[Busybusybust]

DCs say 'mum, meet X, Y, or Z'. I stick out mŷ hand and prepare to say 'how do you do' - and they bloody pucker up and fall upon me like vampires.

What IS. Wrong with shaking hands and smiling? Why do they want to exchange slobber with me?

Sorry, this is so far outside my own experience that I am dumbstruck.

Urghh

Tell them you're currently experiencing a herpes attack and that might put them off in the future

Well it is sort of 'air kissing' but I don't like it. When did this start? It's just wrong.

Hasn't this been how things have been forever?

There's too much bloody kissing going on nowadays. I don't want to kiss everyone I meet.

I felt the same when I moved to south America, now I have to stop myself doing the same when I visit the UK. Sorry, not helpful I know, but maybe younger people greet this way more than we used to? Could you have a quiet word with your DCs and tell them to ask their friends not to assault you but shake hands like a proper grown-up.

Yes, it's everywhere. DS1 and his friends (17/18) hug each other when they meet plus shake hands and slap each other on the back. DH and I have discussed this. In our day, boys/youths who did this would have been thought homosexual. I quite like it, actually. I think it's friendly. It may not be very British, but we don't seem to be British in Britain atm, anyway.

YANBU

How weird, I wouldn't expect people to do that unless I knew them well

That's very odd! Is this a stealthy way of saying you are utterly gorgeous and have all the young ones in love with you?

Play them at their own game. Next time you meet them make sure you have thickly applied lipstick on, grab their cheeks on their face with both hands and give them a big smacker on the gob. Try and grope them a bit too if you can. They'll soon back off

i hate doing this with dh's friends, i think it's something young people do. maybe they saw it on tv?

The whole kissy kissy thing have been prevalent for the past 30 years - total infringement of personal space - its very European though>

I do not know you, I do not wish to kiss you, be air kissed, be pulled into a n embrace either.

YADNBU, I hate it! I hate physical contact with stranger and tbh am uncomfortable with it even when I know people!

TBH is very common - but everyone should let the older female lead

I much prefer it to other greetings, which I find very awkward. It's simple: peck one side, cheek to cheek, then the other, and step back. If everyone does it then no one gets it wrong, AND its a greeting that crosses borders easily too. No uncomfortably close and squishy hug, no cold distant handshake.

I like to have and abide by a set of rules about personal space. If it wasn't a dignified peck on each cheek it would be a hug, and I HATE being wrapped in the arms of someone I don't know well - I barely hug DH and definitely dont hug my parents or siblings. At least with the cheek-kiss you can hold your body back at a suitable distance and all it requires is a slight lean. The body language cues are easy to follow. And nobody will try to rub your back (back-rubbing or patting hugs make me shudder)!

Handshakes are fine for a first meeting with someone you don't know, but too formal and stiff to use outside of a business relationship. And I don't like handshakes with my girlfriends, it feels very wrong. Especially if I'm meeting them for cocktails or dinner, if I'm going to handshake girls I know well I might as well start showing up in a Thatcher wig, 80s power suit and shoulderpads.

And a wave is acceptable with someone who is a) on the far side of the group or b) being introduced to all the group at once by someone else.

I can't believe people under the age of 40 think this is weird?! Isn't it totally the norm amongst your own acquaintances?

Are people honestly telling me they meet people-who-aren't-colleagues with handshakes and how-d'you-dos?!

I find that the girls do it much more, and only 2 of ds's male friends ever kissed/hugged me. Not counting a time when I went along with them to watch them performing karaoke, and I paid their tables tab before leaving. One of them came over and hugged me and said he loved me and some other lavish praises.

I have noticed this with teenage DD and her friends. Big hugs every time they meet up - boys as well as girls. When I was her age nobody did this.

I wonder why there has been such a huge shift in British social behaviour over just 20-30 years?

I don't dislike it though - think its quite sweet.

Agree with PP about the older female part.

I am 46 and hate all this kissing. I too am bemused about where it started. Yes, absolutely I would greet people I don't know with a handshake. Anything else is too close for comfort.

When I was at college even we wouldn't have dreamed of kissing when we met up - when did it arrive on these shores?

How old are they though?

Oh you said grown up sorry I was imagining you offering your hand to a 5 year old. Yeah that's weird

I got a massive telling off from DS1 (26) when I shook hands with his girlfriend on first meeting. I make sure that I kiss and hug her now when we meet even though I would prefer not to - air kiss or peck on the cheek, fine, full blown hugs and kisses like a long lost sister, not so much.

I don't shake hands with my friends- again, a peck on the cheek is plenty. DH kisses his friends too!

carabos, you should never be made to kiss someone you don't want too whatever your age and who ever they are. I would tell your DS to back off tbh.