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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

shall i take the rabbit to the blue cross?

50 replies

eragon · 28/08/2012 12:38

last year we brought a rabbit for the younger kids in the hope that they would take on the responsibiltiy for caring for another living thing.
They are 16 and 14 years old and really wanted a pet. Old enough you would think for such a responsibility.

however if we the parents stop reminding them for even one day to feed and give water or clean its home they dont do anything at all.

every time we have gone out for the day, they just dont bother with the rabbit.
I have threatened to take away the rabbit (who is a rather friendly sweet thing who loves attention and is a fab pet really and deserves better owners) many times.
Today his water bottle was dry again, after hubby and I went out for the day, and its the final straw.
we have spent a lot on money on this animals home and built a large run filled with tunnels, runs and chews, and our willow tree provides great chewing/eating for him. So we have tried to provide a great home, for him.

AIBU?

OP posts:

juniper904 · 28/08/2012 12:45

Is the rabbit likely to find a good home elsewhere? Are they rehomed easily?

SlightlySuperiorPeasant · 28/08/2012 12:47

YABU. Buying a pet for children is a bit like agreeing to be guarantor on someone's rent. If they fail to meet their obligation, it's all down to you, however unfair.

xkittyx · 28/08/2012 12:49

There are large numbers of unwanted rabbits in rescue centers, far more than available homes. It's a living creature and your responsibility.

juniper904 · 28/08/2012 12:55

I have to admit that, as a child and teenager, I asked begged for lots of different animals, and most of the time my mum ended up looking after them. I was not a very responsible owner, but then I knew I didn't really need to be.

When I went to uni I got a cat, and suddenly became neurotic might have woken her up a few times in the night to check she was still breathing. I think that, if your parents are around, then people tend to shirk responsibility because they can and it's easier.

KellyElly · 28/08/2012 13:46

YABU - you are the adult and if your children aren't looking after the pet as agreed its your responsibility. You can't just give an animal away because it hasn't worked out. If you find a proper home for it then YANBU but dropping it off at a charity and expecting them to is out of order.

Paiviaso · 28/08/2012 14:27

YABU. You should not have a bought a pet if you were not willing to take care of it. You are the adult, the care of the animal is ultimately your responsibility.

What were you planning to do with the rabbit if your children go off to university? Your children are 14 and 16, but rabbits can live for up to 12 years...

fluffiphlox · 28/08/2012 14:36

I don't know about the Blue Cross, I was thinking more of a la moutarde (apaolgies for lack of accent, don't know how to do it)

smilingthroughgrittedteeth · 28/08/2012 16:09

I don't think yabu to rehome a pet that isn't being cared for properly, I do however think you were unreasonable to buy a pet for children if you weren't prepared for the fact that you would inevitably become responsible for it.

I also think YAhugelyU to add to the already over run rescue centers who have more than enough rabbits to find homes for.

RuleBritannia · 28/08/2012 16:35

I like rabbit meat and so do others. You could try the local butcher.

There - you're going to carry on looking after it, aren 't you?

Methe · 28/08/2012 16:42

YABU. If you buy your kids a pet you have to ultimately accept responsibility for looking after it. Rabbits don't drink an entire bottle of water in a day.. when you and your husband when out this morning the bottle needed refilling. Why didnt you do it?

Moominsarescary · 28/08/2012 16:58

You could ask around and see if you know anyone who would like a rabbit

Dogsmom · 28/08/2012 17:02

I wouldn't rehome it but if they were my kids there would be repercussions for neglecting it, they are 14 & 16 not 4 & 6 and are old enough to be responsible.

Maybe I'm petty but if they forgot to feed it I'd 'forget' to cook their tea, if they forget to give it water I'd forget to buy their favourite drinks, they clearly take no notice of you nagging them to take care of it so I'd become more pro-active.

AnyoneforTurps · 28/08/2012 17:41

Agree with dogsmom - no food for the rabbit = no food for your DC. Don't cook for them and don't buy treats till they start looking after Bunny. I'd expect to have to nag a pre-teen but, at 14 & 16, they are old enough to insist that they take responsibility.

hiddenhome · 28/08/2012 18:47

You'd be doing it a favour by taking it to the vets and having them put it down. I know it's sad, but it's unlikely to find another home and rabbits are actually quite difficult to care for. If you feel unable to care for it, then have it pts and do not buy any other pets. You can't expect children to look after pets tbh. I've had dozens of pets over the years, but they've all been mine and I'm happy to take full responsibility for them.

Rabbits are not the type of pet for a teen anyway, they have complex care requirements and need quite a bit of attention. Teens should be given ipods and food, not animals.

KellyElly · 28/08/2012 18:53

Yeah good idea Hidden just go and kill it because she can't be bothered to take the responsibility. FFS its a living creature. What the absolute fuck!

hiddenhome · 28/08/2012 19:00

Don't be so sentimental The chances of it finding a decent home are very low. She'd be doing it a favour by putting it out of its neglected misery.

Are you a vegan by any chance? Because if you're not then you have no right expressing an opinion about 'living creatures' If you do happen to be a vegan, then fine, but get real here. This rabbit aint going anywhere decent whatever the outcome.

Snog · 28/08/2012 19:02

Butcher it and feed it to 'em without them knowing

KellyElly · 28/08/2012 19:06

Don't tell me what right I have to express an opinion love. Whether I eat meat has got nothing to do with what I think about someone getting a PET then getting it put down because they've decided it's too much trouble. What a stupid comparison! The best thing she can do is take responsibility and take care of the animal she bought! As for being sentimental no dear just someone who doesn't think its ok to just get an animal put down because you can't be fucked to look after it.

SlightlySuperiorPeasant · 28/08/2012 19:07

Gosh ladies, want to take it outside?

Micha54178 · 28/08/2012 19:14

Stands nervously in the corner while Kelly and hidden slog it out!
I've done the same brought pets for kids that don't take care of them. I now have a cat, two dogs, five fish, two rabbits, a hamster and was considering buying a turtle today!! To a certain degree, picking up the slack of your children is part of owning the pet. We know it's going to happen

hiddenhome · 28/08/2012 19:18

Oh, don't you just hate hysterical outbursts?

Pass it up here and I'll feed it to my snake then Get into a tizzy over that why don't you.

KellyElly · 28/08/2012 19:19

SSP and Micha sorry not meaning to get heated firsty hate the attitude that if you can't be bothered to look after an animal you get it put down and secondly I didn't like the very patronising tone of Hiddens post to me because I don't think its ok to just end the life of a family pet because it hasn't worked out. The RSPCA run numerous campaigns about thinking about the responsibility before you get an animal. Its just such a selfish thing to do. Its not a toy!

IvanaNap · 28/08/2012 19:23

Where are you OP? I'd have a bunny to save it from roaming the streets, getting in with the wrong crowd and having to busk for his carrots :( though no actual room for it

WelshMaenad · 28/08/2012 19:24

Do you know anyone that would be willing to take it on, if you handed over the hutch, run etc?

I disagree that yoofs can't look after pets. I got a rabbit when I was 8. When he developed an abscess I was the one that cleaned and drained it, twice a day, till he recovered. When he got fly strike, I picked all the maggots off him with tweezers and treated his wounds. I also bathed and blowdried him weekly (he was a longhair). If a sub-10 year old can manage that, it's a bit shameful that a 14 and 16 year old can't feed and water a pet, and they don't deserve to keep him. Jesus, even my two year old will come and tell me if the rats' water bottle needs refilling. However, I wouldn't turf him over to rescue, if you can't rehome him yourself I think you're just going to have to accept that you and your DH are going to have to look after it.

hiddenhome · 28/08/2012 19:24

The chances of the OP being able to provide a decent home for this creature is small, so euthanasia is preferable to a life of misery. Rabbits are difficult to care for and it would be a kindness. There are literally thousands of rabbits in rescue shelters, living out their lives in a restricted environment with no quality of life at all. They're fed, watered and cleaned out and that's it.

An objective and sensible move would be to have this animal pts and not to buy any more animals. The OP has made a mistake, she knows this. It's unfortunate for the rabbit of course, but what is preferable?

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