To be nervous about an office romance

[yummychickensoup]

I have a huge bit of a crush on guy at work, I think he feels the same way. I'm not very good at reading the signals but if we weren't single you would say we were having an emotional affair!

Are they a good idea, bad idea? I know a lot of people meet their partners through work but I don't know if I could take the gossip and the questions from nosey work colleagues. I'm a very private person (as is he) and there have already been some comments from nosey colleagues which I hate.

I too married my office romance, our 8th wedding anniversay was yesterday. We both work elsewhere now, but that office was a hotbed for romance. It was a small office with about 50 people of all ages working there, but the period of six years that I worked there romances resulted in 6 marriages including my own (and by now quite a few children).

Does your office socialise much? Embarassing to admit it, but i got together with DH after going to the pub after work for drinks with a whole load of people and then very slightly drunkenly snogging when he walked me to the train station much later. Next day

Not suggesting that is a good way to behave, but something that is a group socialising that you could invite him to and spend some time outside of the office might be an easier first step.

A few weeks ago in the middle of a work related conversation he blurted out "have you ever been to local restaurant". You would think I would have said yes/no and waited to see where it was going but no, I asked him to repeat himself (I didn't think I heard him right, he just blurted it out!!) and then went on on for five minutes about my experience there, which was bad. It was only later I wondered if he was trying to build up to asking me out

Maybe I should pluck up the courage to try something similar...

There's not much social activity apart from the Christmas party which he never attends and I rarely attend. I know he's already made his excuses this year, I'll make mine too - it's generally painful!

Our couple have no rules against relationships, there has been a couple of marriages/relationships (good and bad).

Mardy, our colleagues aren't affected by the work we do so they shouldn't feel like that.

Squoosh, that's very funny - you can be assured I will not be behaving like that! I'm sure he wouldn't either.

Hmm. I've had a number of office shags romances. They've worked out...varyingly, culminating in Mr Inferior.

Oh it does sound like maybe he was trying to suggest going out for a meal. Still at least that would mean he's keen! Do try something similar yourself, I'm sure it's a good idea.

Maybe the "both not going to the Christmas do" is a way in to a conversation about how the two of you ought to go out for a nice quiet drink together instead? And then maybe you could suggest trying out the local bars/restaurants now, in advance of Christmas? You can make that seem a bit jokey if it doesn't seem to interest him.