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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

mother in law - monster?

40 replies

spudpudding · 26/08/2012 20:38

My mother in law has come to visit - staying in hotel - went out for a meal tonight and someone commented on my new hairdo - it is nice - yes she said hubby looked after the two children! - is it just me or would you take offence? i thought they had cut the cord?? and i did leave my children - at home with their father! spoken to hubby who just said it was me and should just ignore her, but she is staying for a week and she does my head in - any advice??

OP posts:

McHappyPants2012 · 26/08/2012 21:40

Good bye op.

No need to get your knickers in a twist because we can't mind read.

ladymariner · 26/08/2012 23:00

Over-reaction!!! Cheerio......

sayithowitis · 27/08/2012 00:28

Other stuff? what 'other stuff'? If you take offence so easily, then maybe your MIL is actually not the 'monster' you say she is. Perhaps she is just a reasonable person who happens to be pleased that her DIL is able to leave the DCs with their father whilst she has her hair done.

I hope and pray that when/if my DCs marry, their partners are not so oversensitive as you. I would hate to be walking on eggshells around my family.

Pandemoniaa · 27/08/2012 00:31

Cheerio, then. If you can't see that "monster" is a ludicrous way to refer to your MIL after she made a tactless and probably rather silly remark then probably, you stopped listening shortly after your OP anyway.

CommaChameleon · 27/08/2012 00:53

Going by that one example, no she is not a monster.

If you can't be bothered to tell the rest of the story then you can't really complain that you haven't been supported. We can only judge on what you can be bothered to tell us and that one comment she made was nothing.

Trust me. Mine has said far, far worse.

QuangleWangleQuee · 27/08/2012 01:31

There isn't really anything wrong with what she said. If she had said "Yes spudpudding was out gallivanting at the hairdressers while poor dh had to babysit for her. Dirty stopout!" That would have been annoying.

MrsHelsBels74 · 27/08/2012 03:22

I guess we were all supposed to answer 'yes, spudpudding she sounds dreadful, how do you put up with it'

TheOnceLer · 27/08/2012 07:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DizzyKipper · 27/08/2012 09:10

I was presuming there was a back story and history of offensive remarks for you to have been upset by this, by itself it's not really anything. Quite bemused by your flouncing though, so soon?

JamieandTheOlympicTorch · 27/08/2012 09:17

OP - you do know we can't read your mind don't you? Don't get upset if people don't immediately agree with you.

Original poster

spudpudding · 26/10/2012 14:31

Just to set the record straight, perhaps monster was a bit much as is calling someone a loon!! Have on-going issues with my MIL and think she has issues with me. Think that you expect them to be like your own mum which isn't the case here. Has always treated me like I wasn't good enough for her son and has never been happy with anything we have done, when I told her I was pregnant she said oh no!! and after a miscarriage, said probably for the best!!. My hubby is a wonderful man and a great father. She does love and spoils the grandchildren but only since they have arrived - was really weird about it when I was pregnant. She has always struggled with the weight and constantly woories about her appearance - so any new clothes or hair I get are never a good thing - this is her problem not mine!!
Possibly should not have posted when I was in a foul mood following the who looked after the two children comment, but you live and learn!! will give a friend a call next time!!
ps they were staying in a hotel as she had come with her sister for a mini break and our house is too noisy!! thanks guys xx

OP posts:

GrimAndHumourless · 26/10/2012 14:38

Spudders we only had the detail in your OP to respond to, always a good idea to try to get as much detail in as you can, yes?

Sorry you are having MIL issues

shesariver · 26/10/2012 14:43

My hubby is a wonderful man and a great father

Well she cant be all that bad then if she has raised him to be like this! Glad you can see calling her a monster was completely unnecessary and OTT.

MumsGoToReykjavik · 26/10/2012 14:47

I'm sorry, I shouldn't laugh but at "pig-ignorant peasant"!

CassandraApprentice · 26/10/2012 15:02

My Dad once called me evil and threaten me with 'people' as I mentioned I was going out for a drink with friends first time in 14 months.

Apparently instead of assuming DH would have baby or unlikely event that wasn't possible I'd find a sitter - he automatically assumed I'd be leaving a small DC in a house by themselves .

Nothing about me or my previous existence would leave a sane person to assume I'd do that. Though when I got to the bottom of it it was my fault for not stating the obvious of course .

I thought WTF and moved on. I've had to prefect over many years a similar response to IL especially MIL who makes some wired and often insulting comments.

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