AIBU to just want to spend my birthday doing what I want in peace and not go to a stupid party

[Shinyshoes1]

I don't want to go to DP's nephews party (see yesterdays thread about DP grans funeral.) It's on the same day as my birthday. I don't like any social occasions especially ones that involve his family. It's not a significant birthday I don't think (21st) I'm sure he is older than that. But his GF has texted all the family saying she is doing a suprise party for him. I can think of nothing worse than dp's brothers and loud mates getting pissed as well as the birthday boys 20 year old something friends

My idea of a perfect birthday would be
going to the cinema in the afternoon by myself
coming home having a nice hot bubble bath
A takeaway, botttle of wine and watching my crap on the telly child free Dp free so he can take them to the party

Yanbu - sounds awful. Can't you say you're doing else?

Dp wants to go which is fair enough as long as he takes the kids

He's got this romantic notion that they are all very close
I pointed out last night that they couldn't be further apart never seeing one member of the family from one year to the next and he got all shirty telling me to fuck off .

He thinks they are all like the Brady bunch or Waltons or something.

They are just loud/rude/bad mannered/ loud pissheads /up themselves/snobs (think I covered them all there ) dickheads.

I can think of nothing worse and will probably end up pissed just to get through the night.

Let him go then - you stay at home and have a Nice evening instead.

Your looking a bit peaky shiney I think you might be coming down with something! Perhaps u should go and have a lie down in bed with a glass of medicinal wine and Buffy box set you dint wanna be spreading your germs to everyone at the party do u? :o

I like the sound of your perfect birthday

YANBU

you are probably right, i'd only end up ruining it anyway cos one of his loudmouth members of the family has rubbed me up the wrong way while trying to be funny or something.

It's all backslapping 'hi hun' fakeness

ooh caffine good idea ... I could feign illness now couldn't I so it doesn't look to obvious

If his family are important to him and you have such a low opinion of each and every member why are you together?

YAnbu to not want to go to the party it's your day, however if DH ever spoke about my family members that way even those we don't see very often I would tell him to fuck off too.

:o

People can fail to recognise bad behaviour in their close families. If you've grown up with it then it can become the norm. An 'outsider' would spot it very quickly though.

Corny booster is right. You haven't got to scratch much below the surface anyway.

Softly...I'm with DP not his family, them I tolerate as and when like they say 'you can't choose your family'. Mine have their flaws, I know that but I don't pretend to be part of this twee little family. His cousin got married 2 weeks ago the one 'that i'm sooo close to ' he didn't even get an invite......to any of it

Why should his nephew's birthday take precedence over yours? I'd be pretty miffed at this, actually. Does it happen every year?

Send dp and dc to the party and have fun on your own.

I'd be upset if my husband chose to go to an adult nephew's party rather than be with me on my birthday. I don't see why someone else's birthday should take priority just because they are having a party and you aren't. You are his wife so your birthday should take priority over a nephew's.