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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To let my kids play out the front with the other kids?

61 replies

melonsmaygotobed · 19/08/2012 23:10

We live in a cul-de-sac. We are one of 5 families whose children love playing out on their bikes/scooters etc and they all get on famously, including the adults. It is, what I call, a 70's utopia.

I was approached this evening, at about 730 by a bloke who lived on the other side of the fence at the end of the road who said that the noise of the children was causing such offence that he was considering moving. He left with the line 'well I've asked you nicely'. I was on my own with my 2 at this point, despite there being 3 families out there half an hour before Hmm

I have logged it with the police, but is the noise of children playing so offensive? They don't chuck things over the fence, they just play. Yes they shriek at times, but they are only out there for about an hour or two a day!!

They are mostly between the ages of 3 and 5.

OP posts:
cocolepew · 19/08/2012 23:24

Good job he doesnt live in my street, they were out until 11pm last week. Singing Hmm. All the houses, except 2 have children that play out, but they have never complained.

NickyNackyNooNoo · 19/08/2012 23:25

Sorry YANBU Wink

Original poster
melonsmaygotobed · 19/08/2012 23:26

The police thing was because of his parting shot. I just thought it was a bit ominous, iykwim. And I got so worked up about it I wanted to prepare myself if he ever popped over for a chat again.

Yes the police were chuckling, but it put my mind at rest!

They were great tho, put it into perspective. But I guess it's taken the joy out of it a bit. I don't want to be concerned with annoying the neighbours every time the kids play out.

OP posts:
GreenEyesAndHam · 19/08/2012 23:30

My 4yo was playing out the front until 9:45 last night Shock

This is the kid who struggles to stay awake past 7:30 usually. He was having such fun with the other children we didnt have the heart to bring him in.

YANBU

Flojo1979 · 19/08/2012 23:31

My dcs (7&3) r usually tucked up by 7pm Blush .....but I only grumble to myself if there's street noise!

WorraLiberty · 19/08/2012 23:33

I don't want to be concerned with annoying the neighbours every time the kids play out

Well really you kind of should be...and believe me I'm a firm believer in kids playing out.

But I'm also a believer in trying to limit any grief it may cause the neighbours...so I don't let them play out too early/too late/or scream the street down.

You can't please everyone...especially some misery guts but it's always a good idea to be concerned about the people living around us.

Original poster
melonsmaygotobed · 19/08/2012 23:34

Thanks all. I know calling the fuzz was an over-reaction but at least I will sleep tonight. Hate conflict. And I appreciate your perspective. I love living here!

OP posts:
TyrannoSoreArse · 19/08/2012 23:35

And once again Worra says it before and better than me.

What Worra said.

NickyNackyNooNoo · 19/08/2012 23:36

Flojo - really 7pm, that's impressive mine are 6 & 7 and 8.30pm is the best I've managed so far this holiday!
They say they can't sleep for the children playing out.....hmmmm!!!

WorraLiberty · 19/08/2012 23:36

Me? Shock

Fucking hell I'm probably pissed or something Tyranno Grin

Original poster
melonsmaygotobed · 19/08/2012 23:41

Yes Worra but it's not just my kids! I would say they play out the same as the others but all the families play out at different / same times. I seem to have received the brunt of all the noise issues. We spend the bulk of the day out and about, then come home at 3ish and play for a bit. Usually we are in at 6.30 for bath and bed and are the first family to drag them in!

OP posts:
TyrannoSoreArse · 19/08/2012 23:42

I think you're probably a very reasonable genius, actually Worra, because most of the time when I think of an appropriate response to an OP - you have already said it Wink Grin

Especially this evening on that stupid 'is this fat' thread which I've had to hide because fut was making my teeth itch!

Original poster
melonsmaygotobed · 19/08/2012 23:43

And I don't mean they are playing for 3+ hours!! They come in while I make dinner, eat it then play put for the last half an hour or so.

OP posts:
FutTheShuckUp · 19/08/2012 23:44

Do you have to bring shit over from other threads? Say it to me on the relevant thread or not at all

Original poster
melonsmaygotobed · 19/08/2012 23:46

And, as an habitual lurker, Worra you do hit the nail...

OP posts:
fortifiedwithtea · 19/08/2012 23:54

YANBU.

Been through similar myself. Live in a cul-de-sac of 8 houses arranged in an L shape around a green. Some years ago neighbours whose garden runs along side the green screamed abuse at the children including one of my own playing out for making noise. As I was in my front garden (doing the gardening) the kids came complaining to me. I reacted by marching over the green and having an debate about what is normal kid noise. Apparently I have a high tolerance level Hmm.

That couple had raised 4 boys including twins in that 3 bed house and I think had forgotten what kids playing sounds like.

Let the miserable old bugger move.

WorraLiberty · 19/08/2012 23:57

One can but try Blush

I don't really have this problem anymore melons as my kids are 20yrs, 13yrs (that one's not a player outer) and nearly 10yrs (he tends to play more outside his friend's house as they have a bigger green)

But when my 20yr old was little, there was a proper misery living in the cul de sac. He used to knock on my door repeatedly because believe it or not I am quite approachable and try to find an 'even keel' with neighbour problems.

But I drew the line when my DS was on holiday with his Dad for 2 weeks and said miserable neighbour still kept knocking on my door and asking me to complain to the other kid's parents for him Angry

Literally all they were doing was playing in the street from about 10am til around 7pm.

NCForNow · 19/08/2012 23:59

What made you call the police??

threesocksmorgan · 20/08/2012 00:06

yabu
you let tiny kids play out in the street and then call the police if someone complains about the noise\yikes

Original poster
melonsmaygotobed · 20/08/2012 00:20

I logged it because the last thing he said to me was 'Well, I've asked you nicely.'

And then he walked off.

I didn't call 999. Just logged it. And I needed advice! And they gave it. Albeit with a bit of a smirk...

OP posts:
Original poster
melonsmaygotobed · 20/08/2012 00:24

And threesocks I am with my children when they play in the road (it's not a street) and they are never unsupervised. Tiny? No. Sociable and playful? Yes!

OP posts:
Original poster
melonsmaygotobed · 20/08/2012 00:33

Thanks fortified, I wholeheartedly believe in children playing with others outside, and teaching them the skills to deal with the great outdoors. How else are they going to make informed decisions in the future? My kids shout 'car!' and make it to the nearest kerb. They ride like billio (sp) on their bikes when we go for a ride but they know to stop at kerbs / corners and what to look and listen for.

Ooh, going off on a tangent.

OP posts:
threesocksmorgan · 20/08/2012 00:37

I still think letting children of that age play out in the street is wrong

Original poster
melonsmaygotobed · 20/08/2012 00:41

Threesocks -why? They are supervised. Is is not a street. Why wrong? They can't ride their bikes in the garden....

OP posts:
Leena49 · 20/08/2012 06:24

Get the kids to wave him off as he moves. Bye bye mr grumpy fart.