To spend my holiday money on holidays and not on speech therapy

[MrsBramStoker]

My DTwin boys just turned 2 and am very very concerned about their language. Or lack of it. It was really, really getting me down so sought out a private SL therapist who will charge 600 for both for an assessment. I was all set to pay it, but DH thinks we should wait til they're 2.5 to see if their language 'accelerates'.

They're on the public waiting list for SLT but this could take about 9 months.

I have a background in language development so was concerned about their delay. I've been very stressed lately too as DH was in hospital and also have DD age 4 so feel we really need this holiday as a family. In fact, was worried about my mental health. My mother and friends were too.

Should be able to afford it in a few months, should I wait til then?

Have frightened myself by googling and think they might have verbal dyspraxia - they have the same few coherent words (more, ball, there, ma ma and some animal sounds) for last 5 months and just babble in incoherent streams. They understand everything, point out what they want and nod and wave so have lots of gestured but everthing they say is 'ah ba'. However, they're smiley, communicative little guys so am hoping it's not ASD.

Feel guilty now about not referring them immediately and very worried. Anyone out there have 2 year old not talking much and turned out fine?

Thanks in advance of your answers

i also have twins boys mine are 3yrs 8 months.... i was also worried about their speach.

But in the last 3 months they have just come on in leaps and bounds, especially since starting nursery school - It was almost as if somthing just clicked one day and pooof they were off , they just have a huge thirst for knowlage now words/letters/shapes/numbers anything really and the constant chatting...... somedays i just wish for those days when they didnt say much of anything ;)

Ds2 was like this - he would point at things, make a noise and DS1 would talk for him. We made DS1 stop talking for him, and stopped understanding what DS2 was saying using nonsense words. Within a month he was chattering away and had caught up.

Don't worry, go on holiday. Whatever happens you will cope better if you have a nice break.

Yes, definitely stop the older one from talking for them. slaps wrists for not taking own advice where DS3 is concerned. I had that problem with getting DS3 to walk. He crawled at 4mo, and was climbing by 9mo.

But he just WOULDN'T get up and walk. Mostly because his (much older) siblings would go and get anything he pointed at and grunted for! Why did he NEED to get up when he had people to do it for him?! Within a week of me stopping the older ones from doing that, he walked. And ran. And crouched. So he was capable of it some time before he did it, he just CBA when he didn't have to.

He eventually walked at 14 months, which may not seem late to most people, but is incredibly late for my family (I walked at 9mo, DD had muscle probs and walked at 12mo, my Dbro has muscle probs and walked at 10mo, my DS1 walked at 7mo!).

Why talk when they are being understood, and have their older sister doing it for them?

Enjoy your holiday!

My oldest son only could say "no" and "ma" until he was 2 yrs 4 months, when more words suddenly started coming out (I remember!).

He was my oldest, and I had no friends with children, so I had no idea this was late. I only realised with hindsight, when my second was born and started speaking way before age 2.

Anyway, the late speaker is now 9 and doing well, he is mildly dyslexic, basically he is still a little bit behind where he should be for his age. He learned reading a year after most kids do, but then caught up and is now exactly where the other kids are. He also has amazing other skills, like violin and karate (he was always great with balance, posture and movement). Just mentioning this as speech is only one aspect of development.

Apparently, but you would know this, boys speech often develops later than with girls.

At "just 2" I would adopt a "wait and see" approach, I really would. We all want our kids to be above average, or at least average, but lots of boys develop a bit later! And then catch up (after all, it is not women ruling the world...yet, is it ). I would be a bit about anyone wanting to assess my child's speech as they have just turned 2, tbh.

My ds1 wasn't saying anything, not even one word at age 2, e would point and say uh for everything. For 6 weeks a health visitor came round and played with him for an hour I try and help encourage him to talk. At about 2 yrs 3 months he started talking and very quickly. Moved on to sentences and conversations. He is 5 ad has just had some speech therapy for mispronouncing a couple of letters but has now been discharged. I would wait another 6 months and see what the situation is then

I hope all these stories have reassured you a bit. Neither of my boys said anything at 2 apart from 'mummy' - they made noises and gestured for everything they wanted. Now you can't shut them up ;)

yanbu, enjoy your holiday!

And if they are already following two-part instructions (pick up the ball - part one - and put it in the playroom - part two), then they are very unlikely to have verbal dyspraxia either.

So let that reassure you a little more!

My DS2 DOES have verbal dyspraxia, and still has issues following two-part instructions, and he is 8y9mo. One of the diagnostic criteria for verbal dyspraxia IS 'can they follow a two-part instruction'. If they can't, it is one of the things that is used to give that diagnosis.

And they can, so don't worry yourself too much.

When they DO start yabbering till your eardrums bleed, come back and read this thread - save it as a word document so it doesn't disappear (_Chat threads only last 90 days before going 'poof'), and look back on this period. It's lively to remember and see just how far your DC have come.

Oh! Just realised it's an AIBU thread! It will still be searchable then.

We have been with an NHS SALT for 18 months or so after fighting for a referral and treatment (there was still a long wait after the initial assessment). DS is now 5 and we have just started to add in private therapy to supplement the NHS.

£600 seems an awful lot - we paid £150 for an initial assessment in school and a further £60 for an extra assessment at the SALTs office - this has included a written report for school.

But I am another saying that there is still time and you should go on your holiday!

Go on your holiday!
There is plenty of time (I know it doesn't seem like it).

One of my DGC didn't say a word until 3 (not one!)- plenty of pointing and own made-up signs.

Won't shut up now...

The way you describe your boys sound exactly like ds at jst turning 2, at about 2.4 it all came together and he was pretty average within a month. Nursery staff would pop out in amazement sometimes at the change in one day, e.g. suddenly using all their names.

It is probably a twin thing but I would insist on firstly getting their hearing checked. It may well be fine but at least you can rule that out.

With DS2 the NHS assessment came quite quickly aged 2.5yrs, we were then told that he had pronunciation problems rather than comprehension ones. They told us the NHS wait was a couple of years (!) and advised to go private if we could.

The £60 per hour we spent on a private speech therapist was, despite the problems paying for it at the time, very good value for money. We went weekly for a few months and I did 'homework exercises' with him every day between appointments. It then gradually moved to fortnightly sessions again with daily homework.

In about 6-9 months of private therapy, he had overcome all his problems and was 'normal'. We went for a follow up before he went to school just to clear up any further issues, but he was fine with no problems.

We were offered our first NHS appointment when he was 5yrs 3 months! I was very grateful we had found the money or he'd have suffered for nearly 3 yrs before being seen. Best money I've probably ever spent.

DS2 also did have glue ear which was mild at the time but ended up with grommets at the end of foundation year, aged 5.5yrs. He has the last grommets removed yesterday at 8.5yrs! (He said it's so nice to be a 'normal child', bless!!!).

Not saying you're in the same boat and I would wait for the nHS assessment but definitely consider going private if he waiting list is very long.

If they understand when you say 'pick up the ball' 'where's daddy?' 'would you like some milk?' etc then they are more than likely fine.

Twins can sometimes speak later - not because they cant, they wont! Twins can have their own communication methods too, which delays speach.

Go on holiday and have a great time.

My son is being assessed for asd, barely said more than a few words at 2, and went to SALT at 3.5. The therapist hardly done anything with him, just a few tests to find out his weaknesses and strong points of communicating then sent me home with lots of tasks for him to do. Even if you go to salt they might send them away until they are a bit older, or give you things to work on at home which tbh you can get from books and online (the salt basically said there wasn't a role for her as I'd found so much material online and in books to do with him so she was comfortable with letting me just carry on).

If I was just sent away to work at home with him and my son has possible asd then I'm sure your boys wouldn't need a lot of 1:1 time with salt, especially at such a young age.

Go and enjoy your holiday and don't worry about your boys, 2 is still quite young.

As I type my prem twin boys are emptying the washing basket. One of them only has about 4 words, they're 18 months old, and the other is very chatty, and talks for both of them. I strongly suspect that the quieter one can't be arsed. Anyway we're using the "takes two to talk" book (Hannen, 2003) and its helping. Ds1, now 3 was also v delayed but caught up everything once he was at nursery, with older children who made him speak properly. He had regressed into baby language.
I'd recommend that book and also push with your HV or community paed team for an earlier assessment, maybe a cancellation. And have a lovely holiday! X

I would probably just go on the holiday, they are on the waiting list for slt so its not like you are doing nothing at all and if you pay out for the private assessment you are then going to have to keep paying more for the private therapy sessions anyway?
My ds2 has speech n language delay too he's 2.8 now, i kept thinking about whether to pay for private assessment or not but it is so expensive and never really came a time that we could afford it so havent got round to having it done but his nhs one is just starting now. I also wonder about verbal dyspraxia for mine because he has got very few variety of speech sounds and everything he says is not clear but if yours can say those words (ball, more) clearly then may be they are okay but just taking their time?
Its natural to worry but you can spend the whole time stressing so have the holiday, your boys will enjoy it too and im sure you can get loads of one on one time with them on holiday which is good for the speech anyway so if you think of it that way holiday is a really positive thing
you can focus more on the speech therapy when you get back, and if you dont have money left for the private assessment when u get back, have a look on here there should be loads of threads in behaviour and development and the sn section with ideas about helping children to develop speech recommeding some books & things, so u could just do that and wait for the nhs appointments to come through

Go on holiday!!!

My twins had hardly any words at 2yrs and now at five I can hardly get a word in edgeways!

If you do need help, there is plenty of good NHS provision. We had a slight worry about DS when he was about 3 and got referred very quickly. Turned out to be nothing to worry about but I was really imporessed how quickly the help was put in place.

I'm a lone voice then but I'd pay for the private speech therapy, but then haven't had a holiday in 10 years so not really that fussed either way where holidays are concerned.

My son was just like your boys at 2 years old. He was still like that at 3. However, now at 8 he never shuts up, he is top of his class and doing really well.

Please relax and give it more time. The speech therapists do absolutely nothing until they are older. All they will do is tell you to come back in 6 months time and you will have wasted that money. I took my son to SLT (NHS) for first time at about 3 and she really didn't do much at all.

2 in my opinion is still young. OK some children talk really well at this age but plenty don't. The fact that they babble and have understanding is a good sign.

Please don't panic, it's very early days yet ...

DS2 wasn't stringing two words together by the time he started pre-school ( 2 yrs 9 m ) and had a load of tests - like your chaps he understood alright, just didn't talk - his first sentance was a bit of a mixed blessing, though, as he declaimed in ringing tones " There you are, Bear, snug as a bugger in ruggery! " and the Aunties didn't know if they should cheer or tear me off a strip for lowering the tone ...

He's making up for lost time now and rarely shuts up unless unconcious.

My youngest girl has just turned 4. When she was two she didn't speak at all, when she turned three she was still almost completely non verbal apart from saying ba (no) and quack. A couple of months ago she started to say single words and now she speaks in sentences and carries on conversations. She's difficult to understand and there are many sounds missing or sounds added on. Much improvement though. We have had input from SALT in the last year and what has worked well for us is using Makaton. Once she got the idea of signing it's as if she realised that communicating in other ways than grunting and shouting was a good thing. Cued articulation has also been hugely helpful in helping her to understand the sounds she needs to make.

It took till he was 7 and a Tribunal to get my DS NHS SALT. Keep a close eye on their receptive skills as these are often not picked up by the NHS. Also get their hearing checked out by an audiologist, before paying for SALT - any pro salt worth their salt would rec this anyway before embarking on an assessment/therapy course for kids of this age (glue ear has a lot to answer for in many cases!).

I'd purchase "it takes two to talk", do a Hanen course myself & do lots of sing and sign for 6 months. (I credit sing & sign for the fact that my ASD lad was an early talker and still has great expressive language! The visual prompting encouraged his verbal attempts - my sis is finding the same with my niece)

That lil lot will cost far less than the £600 for an assessment yet your boys will be getting help iyswim while you wait as early intervention IS important! Have the holiday, but don't be totally passive .

Your boys will be formally assessed in 6 months by the NHS- so if they need it appropriate help can be put in place by the time they start nursery, which due to the presence of a fun peer group is the ideal motivator for a SALT programme. Do tell the NHS clinic you are happy to grab a cancellation spot at short notice if anyone higher on the list cancels. (A neat tip another Mum gave me).

DC1 did not talk at 2. Now, at 4.5 we still have only very limited language and a diagnosis of severe autism. The support we get on the NHS is awful - we had about 10 hours of Salt over the last two years. We fund all therapy privatly and have not been on holiday for 5 years for that reason. For me the choice between holiday and therapy is a no-brainier.