To ask that if you let your kids play out...

[Wolfiefan]

You don't send them round here to shout,scream and charge up and down the street outside my toddler's room?
She has decided NEVER to nap again but still clearly needs to. I am knackered and have loads to do tomorrow. I planned a chilled out evening instead of this noise. It's now nearly 10pm.
PLEASE let me go to bed now.

it would have to be 'FACK ORFT' to be posh

Bless you troll. She can play in my road.
If I do pinky and curlers do I need a fag too! Have now pictured myself in Nora Batty stockings with a broom!
You lot cheer/lighten me up!

Now the mother is trying to track her kids down via a mobile!

Yep you need a fag hanging out the corner of your mouth.

mobile what? home?

got any potato peelings? that's the sort of thing you need to throw out of your kitchen window at them with hilarious consequences

Home? Arf! What if I only have chips in the house? Can I throw an oven chip?

you can't be a ranting fish mongers DP with a frozen chip - got any window-washing water?

Thanks false. Where would I be without MN?
(Damn. That reminds me... must clean windows!)
I have a water pistol (pump action natch), ice chips, fizzy drink. Will any of that do?

don't go out with a bloody water pistol, they'll think you're out to play

i better go now, got to call my DCs in - they're out playing down the end of the road and it's a bit dark...

Haha false! Beware a mad woman who may yet turn to alcohol (or chocolate I'm not fussy) wearing a pinny, curlers, fag drooping from madly rouged lips and toting the mother of all washing up bowls full of water she has used to clean her skirting boards!
You have been warned!

it'll be like looking in a mirror

Haha!

thank god I don't live on an estate

No one around here after the farmers have finished chopping wood, mowing, harvesting etc On the down side they did start sawing up a massive tree with a very loud chainsaw at 7am

I suggest you move to the cunt tree HTH

Sounds much more like it. We will be up before 7 anyway!
PS. It's not an "estate". It's a village!

village/estate all the same thing......basically folk who will make a noise

Hmm. Liking the sound of a country estate!