Passive aggressive smiling/laughing

[Lucyellensmum99]

makes me homicidal

Poor you.

(Sorry, couldn't resist.)

Who is doing this? I hate it when someone smiles but isn't actually happy - at work there is a berk who smiles and says "I thought we agreed this" - cue menacing tone. Really unpleasant.

My MIL does it and my DP did exactly the same little sarcastic laugh the other day, i actually visualised his slow and painful death in my head, whilst smiling at him of course!

Oh and my aunt, she is the queen of the PA smirk/laugh, with a spattering of poor me Passive pathetic laugh too.

No particular reason, the thought just crossed my mind.

do you have some examples lucyellensmum?
My stepmother was/is a teacher and has this off to a fine art.
it drives me insane.
for example......
me; 'could we come on holiday with you?'
her; hahahahahahahhaahaha

as though the question was so utterly ridiculous it wasn't even worth a reply?
grrrrrrr

I'm not sure if I understand this.

But I think my mother does it..she was a teacher.....I can only cope with her after a stiff drink.

Just by saying something along the lines of "im havin a horrible time staying at XXX house, they have small children and they are really noisey etc" pathetic PA laugh - by aunt. Why laugh, its not even fucking funny - fumes hmm, im not making any sense am i. MIL when telling me how a family meal had to be cancelled for some reason (trivial) "oh and SIL put the kybosh on it" PA laugh that emitted from DPs mouth the other day, it was like she was in the room - murderous now

makes me homicidal

let me know when you're completely over the edge

[grins]

There is a lady that sells a newspaper at the traffic lights near where DH works.
She constantly has this mad grin plastered on her face.
He thinks she's lonely and calls her 'laughing on the outside, crying on the inside'

[grins]

Its "" love, ""

I thought you meant here on MN where people litter them all over the place like this while making nasty cutting remarks

thanks tigger!
hahahahhahahahahahaha
(how does one write a humourless laugh?)

Oh it's one of the few things that makes me feel violent. Saying it with a smile or a laugh doesn't negate the bitterness behind it. Many people have assumed that I'd not just call them right out for it. Wrong It's utterly disingenous and cowardly too. If you've something to say, speak plainly or shut up really.

Ladybeagleeyes - i don't take comments on mnet seriously, its not my real life, so they don't make me homicidal. Just likely to cause GBH

To be fair smellslike, i had never heard of it until i came on MN! I actually think calling someone passive aggressive is a very passive aggressive thing to do. I called my DP it once, he said "what have you been taking " ?

I have a colleague who is amazingly, expertly, professionally passive aggressive.

It's the constant apologising that almost has me screaming with rage.

Oh dear I always thought those laughs were sort of nervous laughs, like a nervous tic. I've always associated it with people who are perhaps not comfortable with social interactions with people, shy people, people not sure if they are saying the right thing for various reasons. Then I've always gone out of my way to try and make them feel comfortable.

I do have a friend who does have a loud involuntary laugh, think of Tourette's syndrome with a laugh instead of a swear. She can't not do it.

It never crossed my mind that any laughs or smiles were passive aggressive - though actually I'm glad about that.

Otherpeopleslifes - think of Tourettes Syndrome with a laugh instead of a swear ??

You are very insensitive to people living with TS! You're one of those twats who also think everyone with TS swears, but lets just "swap" it round for a maniacal laugh instead, because it funny to poke fun at people with TS directly or indirectly!

You have no clue how people with TS struggle each day.

:)

Can anyone define what 'passive aggressive' means, please?

For me, it means sort of sarcasm that is very difficult to retaliate against. Difficult to describe but i know when im on the recieving and of it, and i think i can be pretty passive aggressive myself sometimes, that is a bad thing.

I know what you mean about the nervous laugh, but PA people do this and try and make it sound like a nervous laugh, the difference is what has been said BEFORE the nervous laugh. "Sorry i am late, i just got stuck in traffic, it was an absolute nightmare, but hey, you know how it is" nervous laugh thats OK.
"Oh, don't worry about being late, get stuck in traffic did you?" half laugh = passive aggresive. OR at least i think.

Gunznroses - i don't think you are being very fair, i don't think otherpeoples was being insensitive at all, just describing her friends laugh, her friend may have tourettes, or she may just get nervous. Most people associate TS with swearing, but i think most people also realise that it not always the case.

Lucyellen - I am being unfair ????? how dare you! Otherpeoples knew exacatly what she was doing, it was meant to be funny and backfired! its quite clear from her post that hear friend does not have TS.

IF most "idiots" associate TS with swearing they should therefore they not be corrected ? this is the kind of crap that people with SN have to deal with on a daily basis and when they complain they're being unfair, because they of course are lesser beings.