to ask if competitive grandparenting normally raises it's ugly head near the 1st birthday?

[newmummytobe79]

Argh!

Or am I just a sh*t mum?

MIL was v full on when baby was born. I felt suffocated but as time went on it became more bearable and visits have subsided to once a week.

To give a bit of background - me and DH adore our baby but are not lovers of kids parties and will never be brownie/scout leaders!

1st birthday is coming up and I want us to spend the day with DC at the zoo. On our own. As a family. and I LOVE the zoo

Happily to host a family and friends get together for a couple of hours on the weekend before DC's birthday and totally understand if people are busy can't be arsed! as it's at the weekend.

I'm not a great cook but was going to make DC a cake. My mum offered as she has made the family birthday cakes since day dot so I happily accepted the offer and will 'assist'.

MIL now wants to get a shop made cake with 'to my grandchild' on ... I told her my mum was making a cake but I didnt see why we can't have two. She seemed a bit put out but then she confirmed she'd get one and was putting 'grandchild' on it. Oh ... and would I like baby's name on it? Errrr YES!

I'm not getting one with 'PFB' on it ... or even making one! and I also feel like my mum is now being 'out-caked' ... if that phrase even exists!

Is this just the way 1st birthdays go?!?

I'm guessing by 4 no-one even cares!

Sit them down together and get them to plan ONE cake together. If your mum is the accepted cake maker, let MIL buy the ingredients.

Tell the pair of them they are barking mad and knock their heads together!

This is what I wanted - a trip to the Zoo. DS was born near Christmas though so we couldn't do that. I hade an informal 'just pop in, there will be cake' affair in my house. Never again. Next time I am hiring a hall or a leisure centre so people will have to leave when our alloted time is up because people were there for hours and eventually wine was poured and it just became chaos.

A home made cake beats a shop bought one any day, your mum might be outcaked by decoration, but the actual cake will be much better! I know which I'd want to eat.

I wouldn't worry too much about it.

hahaha - I was thinking of opening the wine before anyone arrives!

I also agree that you can't have too much cake! :)

But ... as I'm assisting in the home made cake I will of course want to bring the big 1 candle out in that for baby to blow spit all over the cake out.

This is where I will have eyes burning into me ...

Or do I just go with the my kid, my cake rule!

Ha, we had competitve grandparenting between my aunt and mother from the get-go: both had DGC at the same time (though my DS was my DM's pfb). Possible round II now, as my psb coincided with another DGC on the oher side!