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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to think overtaking a funeral cortege is beyond discourteous

118 replies

ChaosTrulyReigns · 14/08/2012 14:08

3 times on 2 mile journey the procession was overtaken by impatient twits. I wasn't in the process in, just the first car behind the 2 ca s following the hearse.

Really? Have people got such low levels of respect these days.

[auld]

OP posts:

Yankeecandlequeen · 14/08/2012 14:35

At the end of the day not everyone has the time to get stuck behind a cortege. As a PP said they could be on their way to hospital to see a dying loved one.

You just don't know so really can't judge the situation.

Flossyfloof · 14/08/2012 14:35

I would not do it on a normal road, but as others have said there may be pressing reasons to do so. I have done it though on a dual carriageway but slowly to try to show some respect - don't know if anyone noticed. I drove behind a motorbike and sidecar hearse yesterday, followed by one rider. I didn't overtake. It was lovely.

WilsonFrickett · 14/08/2012 14:38

I have done it by accident. If it's a long cortege you don't always know till you see the black cars at the front.

MissTapestry · 14/08/2012 14:39

Eh? Is that A THING YOU JUST DON'T DO then?

Learn something new every day.

Flossyfloof · 14/08/2012 14:41

Miss Tapestry, it is a sign of respect for the departed person and the family not to do so. If you see one in the street you stop and wait for it to go past. You don't have to, of course; we do.

pictish · 14/08/2012 14:41

No offence folks, but truth be told, when I die, I won't feel the need to hold up every other car on the road out of respect for me.

Yellowtip · 14/08/2012 14:42

I was in Italy some years back when we were overtaken by a hearse (complete with coffin, flowers etc.) which was belting along the carriageway at at least 100mph.

If someone has to get somewhere fast, I'd be fine with them overtaking any cortege I was in. As for punching someone : what respect does that show to the person who's died?

Psammead · 14/08/2012 14:45

Just what I was about to say, pictish. I might add it into my Will that my funeral car should go at the speed limit where possible. I just don't personally see the point.

BUT, I respect those who do and as such wouldn't overtake.

solidgoldbrass · 14/08/2012 14:45

I think it's very entitled to insist that you have the right to hold up everyone else on the road. There are all sorts of good reasons why someone might not have the time to allow a long cortege to pass them; taking a sick or injured person to hospital, going to visit someone who's dying, going to collect your sick or injured child from school... stuff like having a job interview or a payment to make so your house isn't repossessed. But I think the living are more important than the dead, no matter what.

MissTapestry · 14/08/2012 14:46

Flossie- I've just never heard of it that's all, come to think of it I don't think I've ever been stuck behind one, so I don't know what I'd do, depends on the road I suppose.

iliketea · 14/08/2012 14:46

On a normal single lane rd, it is disrespectful. But on a dual carriageway or motorway, it is difficult. The busy cemetary (services every 30 - 60 mins, all day, mon to fri) nearest me is on a 3 lane major rd, if people didn't drive past in other lanes, the road would be even more like a giant car park. Clearly cutting up / pulling in front of the hearse is unacceptable, but I don't think driving past is. As others have said, you also might not realise it's a funeral procession until you get close to the front, as long as you don't pull in front of the hearse, i don't see a big problem.

ginmakesitallok · 14/08/2012 14:47

Surely it's dangerous to travel sp slowly on a motorway our dual carriageway ? I would overtake, but would sit in the overtaking lane a bit longer than usual.

TheQueenOfDiamonds · 14/08/2012 14:48

fruity

If shed not been so cowardly as to do it as she overtook and pulled round I would have got out and knocked her into next year. I was raging.

oldraver · 14/08/2012 14:48

Depends on the circumstances... motorway or dual carriageway fine. Single lane not so.

I know at my Grandmothers funeral a car cut in behind the hearse so separated it from the family car... That was very rude

pictish · 14/08/2012 14:51

How about we just do away with corteges entirely then? Just sack them off completely.

They're a self important load of bollocks tbh.

CurlyhairedAssassin · 14/08/2012 14:51

I live near a cemetery/crem and have to say that I overtake the corteges on the nearby dual carriageway. Not screaming them past them obviously, but I just don't feel it's necessary to creep along behind them as if i were part of the funeral too when there is an overtaking lane. I'm sure it would seem wierd to the funeral goers anyway if I didn't go past. I get back in the other lane when I'm way past them.

I do not overtake funeral corteges on single lane carriageways. That is disrespectful as usually it means accelerating fast to get past them and back in again.

hellhasnofurylikeahungrywoman · 14/08/2012 14:54

It's not just these days. We buried my sister 30 years ago and on our trip to the crematorium several drivers thought it was OK to overtake the cortège, not be able to and break it up for a time. Her cortège was one hearse, one limo and a few family cars (not many 2-3 at most). Made a difficult day even more difficult because DM took to raging about it in the limo on the way to the service and had to be calmed down.

fruitysummer · 14/08/2012 14:58

Those of you happy to overtake on single carriageway.

What do you do when there is more than one car to overtake?

Do you seriously overtake the one at the back then cut in front of the next one in the line and so on until you have got past them all?

TirednessKills · 14/08/2012 14:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CurlyhairedAssassin · 14/08/2012 14:59

Not sure how thick you have to be to cut a hearse up. Jesus, imagine if it were a child you were burying and someone cut in front of you and their coffin. I would be even more devastated.

Maybe those thinking that the living are more important than the dead should be considering the heartbroken relatives, not the actual dead person.

CurlyhairedAssassin · 14/08/2012 15:00

Exactly, hellhasnofury!!

NarkedRaspberry · 14/08/2012 15:02

Totally disrespectful. It happened when we were on the way to the graveside to bury my grandmother.

pictish · 14/08/2012 15:04

So theoretically, I should accept being late for a job interview say, because I have inadvertantly caught up with a corsege?
I should accept missing my plane?

Nanny0gg · 14/08/2012 15:18

If a cortege has a distance to go it doesn't go at 5mph for the whole journey, so it will eventually get up to speed or turn off.

So just wait for heaven's sake!

5madthings · 14/08/2012 15:25

generally as nanny said they only go slowly for a short part of the journey, normally at the beginning and then again at the end near the cemetary/crematorian.

surely when you are going to catch a plane for example you factor in traffic jams and hold ups and make sure you have plenty of time?

i do agree there are some circumstances where you may have to overtake, but on the whole it is respecful to just slow down and wait.

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