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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to refuse to have an internal scan?

29 replies

emily2012 · 12/08/2012 19:40

hello all!
okay - bit of backstory, i had a very traumatic MC around 18 months ago, obviously no MC is a 'nice' one but things went very badly wrong and I ended up very ill and traumatised for a logn time afterwards and still haven't come to terms with some aspects of my treatment in hospital etc.
I know the doctors and nurses etc were just doing their jobs but at points I felt like an animal at the vets, and they had to be quite rough with me and I went a looong time without any painkillers, then straight on to morphine.

Anyway, I've found out I'm pregnant again, hurray! it's early, around 6 weeks and I do want to have bloods and things checked to makesure it is growing ok and not another mc (last one was at 12 weeks) but I just cannot get my head around having internal things done. I will MAKE myself be okay for smear type things, but the idea of an internal scan is making me panic :(

Can I say no to one and what would my options be?
any help much appreciated!

OP posts:
HermioneE · 12/08/2012 19:43

You mean a transvaginal scan?

Have you had one before? It should not be at all traumatic. Not as invasive as a smear test. More like rather boring foreplay in my experience (I've had two, once for a polycystic ovaries check and once for an early pregnancy check).

TheDreadedFoosa · 12/08/2012 19:44

Internal scan isnt standard though, is it? Is there a reason you are expecting it?

xMumof3x · 12/08/2012 19:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

cogitosum · 12/08/2012 19:46

You may not need one. I had an early scan at 7 weeks and they didn't need to do an internal just normal ultrasound. I don't think they could make you - particularly if early scan is at your request but there is a chance they may not get a good view on ultrasound and need to do an internal to see anything. IME they try ultrasound first. (I had another scan showing mm and they did an internal to be sure)

Moominsarescary · 12/08/2012 19:48

I had a scan in this pg at 7 weeks and it didn't need to be internally. The only transvaginal scans I've had have been when I've mc

MrsDmitriTippensKrushnic · 12/08/2012 19:50

IME they only do TV scans when the pregnancy is too early for anything to be seen doing an abdominal one. If you go to the EPU to check everything's okay (quite understandably - DS1 & DS2 were fairly crap pregnancies and I was in and out of the EPU every week until we hit 12 weeks so I get needing reassurance) at 6 weeks I think the only thing they can do is a TV scan - things are too small to do the other way. I can't remember when that changes unfortunately, hopefully I've crossposted with someone who does!

MrsDmitriTippensKrushnic · 12/08/2012 19:51

There you go - if they can do a normal one at 7 weeks then you can probably avoid it!

monsterchild · 12/08/2012 19:52

I am with Moomins, (and they are kind of creepy!)
I only had a transvaginal when it appeared I had a missed MC. I am currently 20 weeks and nothing has required me to remove my knickers. The ultrasound is internal if you count that its looking inside me, but though my belly.

I don't think you are UR to refuse one if they way it is routine, nothing bad about the tummy scan.

I even had my very very very detailed anatomy scan though the tummy.

GhostShip · 12/08/2012 19:53

If they insist you need one then YABU.

I know they're not nice but even though I hate this saying 'it's for your own good'

tattyteddy · 12/08/2012 19:54

Hello OP, I had an early scan at 8 weeks following a MC, they just used a normal ultra sound and could see DD fine xx

timetomoveon · 12/08/2012 19:57

I found internal (transvaginal) scans a lot less uncomfortable than a smear.

When you are early in pg, then it's a lot easier to see things with a tv scan but if you can wait a week or two, then you'll probably be able to have an abdominal ultrasound instead. I do know how hard it is to wait (having had a mc myself) and how much you need the reassurance.

I'm 6-7 weeks pg and am going for a scan tmrw. I'm expecting it to be transvaginal tbh.

Ilovedaintynuts · 12/08/2012 19:59

Of course you can refuse an internal scan. The problem is they can't be guaranteed to see everything clearly through your abdomen.
Anything before 9/10 ish weeks is trickier, especially if you have a retrograde uterus (about 20% of women have this).
At 6 weeks it would be clinically indicated to have a trans-vaginal scan.

You need to weigh up your need for reassurance (early scan) with your desire for having it done abdominally ( later).

Good luck.

Margerykemp · 12/08/2012 20:02

Yanu to refuse any medical action you don't want.

TheVermiciousKnid · 12/08/2012 20:04

You most definitely can refuse an transvaginal scan (or any other scan). As with any other scans or tests in pregnancy it is entirely your choice. The early scan helps with dating and can be reassuring but not having it doesn't put you (or your baby) at risk. In most cases though an abdominal scan will be sufficient anyway. However, if it turns out that it will not be sufficient and a transvaginal scan is suggested you do not have to agree to it, especially if you find it so stressful.

DigestivesWithPhiladelphia · 12/08/2012 20:07

Emily, sorry you had such a traumatic time, it sounds like it was really awful for you.

As others have said, you shouldn't need an internal as this stage. However, if you do require any internal exams during the pregnancy or in labour and you choose to accept them (as you always have the option to say no, of course) then requesting gas & air might be helpful you.

After my first labour, I have anxiety about internals (because of the pain I anticipate & the fact that the Dr wouldn't take her hand out of me even when I was screaming for her to stop) and I deal with it now by saying "I'm not good with internal exams, I'll need some gas & air". I tell them this at any point in the pregnancy I'm being examined, even if there is no reason to expect pain. No doctor has questioned this or refused and one trainee said to me: "I prefer it when women are honest if they're anxious and have a coping mechanism like you have, it makes it easier for me".

If it was ever queried, I would put my foot down and I would refuse the exam. I also don't let Drs near me if they have an abrupt bedside manner.
The key thing to remember is - YOU are in control. No-one is allowed to touch you without your consent & if you withdraw that consent then they must stop immediately. That's not any medical professional doing you a special favour, it is merely them working within the law and doing their job properly.

Never feel you are being precious or a pain because of this, it's up to you to decide what you can and can't tolerate and also to INSIST on pain relief when you want it, not for someone else to decide that your pain is 'enough'.

Sorry I went off on a bit of a tangent there - this is something I feel very strongly about! Congratulations on your pregnancy, I hope it all goes smoothly.x

honeytea · 12/08/2012 20:08

you can refuse to have any scans you want in pregnancy. I have had loads of internal scans for fertility treatment and they have been less bother than a smear, I can understand why you would feel anti internals after a MC.

I had a 7 week internal scan to see the heart beat early, I was curvy chubby pre pregnancy so I think that is why they did an internal scan. When I went in at 10 weeks to have a scan it was a normal on the tummy scan.

Unless they think you are having an ectopic pregnancy I don't know why they would need to do an early scan. For us it was to reasure us that we were actually pregnant, if it is just a dating/reaurence scan there is no reason you shouldnt wait till 8/9 weeks when they will definatly be able to avoid an internal.

Good luck with your pregnancy :)

Marrow · 12/08/2012 20:11

Transvaginal scans are fine. I have had lots of them and they really are ok. I can't cope with the idea of internal examinations and avoid smear tests but tv scans don't worry me now. They will use lots of lubrication and you will be covered in a sheet. It really is very discrete and your modesty is protected. You don't have to have anything done that you don't want to. It depends how much and how soon you want the reassurance of a scan. Congratulations and I hope all goes well for you.

BJR · 12/08/2012 20:13

I had two transvaginal scans during my pregnancy with DS. I didn't find them uncomfortable at all but can understand why you would be apprehensive after what you've been through.

For me this was done as I had a low lying placenta and DS was in an awkward position. So although I could have refused I was happy for them to go ahead as they were able to get a clearer picture of exactly how far the placenta was away from my cervix. This was at 22 week and then a 36 week scan.

lotsofcheese · 12/08/2012 20:24

YANBU. I've had 2 m/c, in both instances the abdominal scanner was used 1st before the internal one. I didn't find it sore or uncomfortable as they used plenty KY Jelly (sorry, TMI)

However, I got a good abdominal scan result at 8+5 - was advised to wait till then as "they would definitely be able to see it then".

Also, I'm afraid to say that few units offer reassurance scans, only giving scans in instances of pain/bleeding. So you may need to go private fir this.

MsPickle · 12/08/2012 20:28

Hi I hate them but at my hosp (kings in London) they are now standard at 12 wks and 22, haven't had the 32 yet so don't know about that one. I've always had to give consent, I explained I wasn't going to find it easy and they were very reassuring all the way through & I felt I could have stop at any point.

Downandoutnumbered · 12/08/2012 20:34

YANBU to refuse, but as others have said you may not need one. I had an early scan (8 weeks) with DS as my previous pregnancy had gone very wrong and that was an abdominal scan. I've only had transvaginal scans when I was having fertility investigations.

AmberLeaf · 12/08/2012 20:39

They wanted to do one with my last pregnancy but I wasn't expecting it and didn't feel comfortable with it so I said thanks but no thanks. They were fine about it. They said that they are good for checking cervix competency.

I've had normal abdo scans at 5 1/2 weeks and they were able to see everything and I'm 'fleshy'!

Congratulations on your pregnancy!

Moominsarescary · 12/08/2012 20:40

Thanks monster people usually tell me moomins are lovely (shiver)

Op I'm sure you could refuse one, noone is going to force you. as long as every things ok though you probably won't need one. I have incompetant cervix and although this means lots of internals all scans to check it have been abdominally

How do you feel about giving birth? I think you can give birth these days without internals, intervention but what if it's needed? Do you think some counselling might help?

Original poster
emily2012 · 12/08/2012 20:46

thanks so much everyone, i think that if they want to do one i might just ask to go back in a couple of weeks and try abdominal instead.
disgestives- thanks so much - it's good to hear someone has had a similarish experience, am sorry it had to happen though.

It's the daftest thing and I'm guessing a few of you are the same but i'm very confident and self assured in every other way but I find it so hard to stand up for myself in front of medical professionals?! weird huh.
going to put my foot down though, as a few of you have said, it is my body and my right to pick treatment.
I'm not worried at all about giving birth or anything. just want everything to be alright :)

OP posts:
Moominsarescary · 12/08/2012 20:49

Thanks monster people usually tell me moomins are lovely (shiver)

Op I'm sure you could refuse one, noone is going to force you. as long as every things ok though you probably won't need one. I have incompetant cervix and although this means lots of internals all scans to check it have been abdominally

How do you feel about giving birth? I think you can give birth these days without internals, intervention but what if it's needed? Do you think some counselling might help?