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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to feel uneasy about my gardener (teenage daughter of a friend) peeing in the garden rather than in the house?

41 replies

victorialand · 12/08/2012 12:40

My friend's teenage daughter, who is very green-fingered, has recently started to do some gardening work for me at weekends. Yesterday she was clearing a patch of ground at the bottom of the garden, which was a large job and meant that she was outside for most of the day. Because it was so hot out, even in the shade, I took out drinks to her at regular intervals throughout the day.

On one occasion, I couldn?t see where she was so I called her name and when she didn?t answer I went to look for her thinking that she must have gone to the shed to get some more tools. When I was making my way towards the area where the shed is I spotted her squatting down by some bushes and having a wee.

She wasn?t looking in my direction, so I backed away before she noticed me and returned to the area where she had been working and just left her drink there. When I went out to her again later I didn?t mention anything about what I?d seen because I didn?t know how to broach the subject without embarrassing her.

The part of the garden that she was peeing in is quite self-contained and not overlooked by neighbours but I?m not sure how I feel about her going outside, as my little ones also play in the garden, albeit quite a distance from where she was working. I told her when I took her on that she could use the bathrooms in the house if she needed to so she is aware of this.

Should I mention anything to her about this incident or just turn a blind eye to it?

If she is going to pee outside I much would rather that she did it by the compost heap behind the shed. Would it be indelicate to mention this to her?

OP posts:
AllFallDown · 12/08/2012 16:11

Presumably, given you wouldn't want to sit where there has been any urine, you have some kind of chemical testing kit to check your lawn for all kinds of animal urine before sitting down.

YABU, to be honest.

Mayisout · 12/08/2012 19:18

Where do you think outside workers pee normally, and delivery men and salesmen. I don't think they drive miles out of their way to pee in the nearest public toilet.

I have had alot of workmen working in the garden (building a garage and landscaping). When I'm home the door to the house is open and toilet available but, naturally, I"m not leaving the door open when I'm out so I assume they pee behind their van.

YABU and unrealistic.

bringbacksideburns · 12/08/2012 19:21

Say to her next time you see her "Next time you want a pee would you use my toilet?"

YANBU.

This is someone you know who could just ask?

SmellsLikeWhiteSpirit · 12/08/2012 19:22

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

manicinsomniac · 12/08/2012 19:24

I have always had a real thing about using the loo in other peoples' houses. Even if they're good friends I just feel weird about it and can't explain why. I have to be in someone's house for hours and really need to go before I will use their loo.

I can well imagine, as a teenager, feeling really desperate but too shy to go inside and thinking a quick pee in the garden won't be noticed.

I agree it's gross but she really might have felt that awkward.

CleoSmackYa · 12/08/2012 19:29

Perhaps it's to keep cats and foxes away? Or is it just mens wee that does that?

RuleBritannia · 12/08/2012 19:31

You could put a toilet roll by the compost heap? And a bucket to receive used paper?

LarkinSky · 12/08/2012 19:48

I loved that BBC article linked to titled 'Pee to make your garden grow'.

Rosemary Hooper, Wimpole estate's in-house master composter, said: "Adding a little pee just helps get it all going; it's totally safe and a bit of fun too."

I think that could be classed as true British eccentricity aided and abetted by the Beeb. Grin

qwerty2009 · 15/08/2013 00:30

Sounds Like Lizard

qwerty2009 · 15/08/2013 00:38

Sounds Like Lizard

NutcrackerFairy · 15/08/2013 08:06

I really don't see the issue and think you are being a bit mimsy about this.

Peeing is natural, we all do it. Decency dictates that we pee out of sight, and it sounds as if this girl did try to do this although I accept you stumbled across her and were shocked.

But seriously are you 108 or something with fragile nerves?

If you feel you need to say something just tell her where you are happy for her to pee, i.e. inside in the toilet or behind the compost heap or wherever.

But for heaven's sake don't make a song and dance about it and try to embarrass the poor kid!

SillyTilly123 · 15/08/2013 08:07

ZOMBIE THREAD !!

Sparrowlegs248 · 15/08/2013 08:26

YABU. Nothing wrong with peeing outside, i do it almost daily (in the field/stable)

ParsleyTheLioness · 15/08/2013 09:36

Wondering why qwerty has revived this zombie thread...

ParsleyTheLioness · 15/08/2013 09:37

Welcome to Mumsnet qwerty!

Balaboosta · 16/08/2013 20:03

The rose outside the ladies bogs in the Regents Park rose garden is the species ''Golden Showers". They've stopped replacing the sign now, it got nicked so often.

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