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AIBU?

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Spam

6 replies

NoComet · 11/08/2012 17:30

Fucking junk clogging up my in box, yes I know I can get the resident geek to block them, but I'd rather Fucking well rather they fucked the fuck off.

That's all!

OP posts:
iklboo · 11/08/2012 18:33

I had hoped this was a thread about lurid pink tinned meat from my childhood, but I kinda figured it would be about junk email. I share your frustrations & pain.

WHY do they think I'll fall for bank account scams, buy medicine over t'internet or plough my hard-earned into gambling sites.

McHappyPants2012 · 11/08/2012 18:42

My Internet was off for 2 weeks I had 259 emails and only 1 was opened all the others deleted

Dawndonna · 11/08/2012 18:49

I could just go a spam fritter!
Grin

iklboo · 11/08/2012 19:00

School trip packed lunches:
Spam on Warburton's sliced white bread with piccalilli
Packet of XL crisps or 'Fish n chips'
Blue Riband bar or Penguin
Carton of orange juice

Grin
NameChangeGalore · 11/08/2012 19:07

Dear StarBallBunny

I decided to write you this proposal in good faith, believing that you will not betray me. I have been searching for someone who will assist me to finalize this transaction so when I saw your name I was pushed to contact you since you have the same last name with my late customer and see how best we can assist each other.

Meanwhile I am MR.PETER WILLIAMS, a reputable banker here in African Development Bank Accra-Ghana. On 15th March 2007, my customer, Mr StarBallBunny rabbit, a citizen of your country and Crude Oil dealer made a fixed deposit with my bank for 36 calendar months, valued at US$10,500,000.00 (Ten Million, Five Hundred Thousand US Dollars) and the mature date for this deposit contract was on 31st of March, 2011. But Sadly StarBallBunny rabbit was among the death victims in the 12 May 2008, Earthquake disaster in China that killed over 5,000 people. Because he was in China to visit is family and that was how he met his end.

My bank management is yet to know about his death, but I knew about it because he was my friend and I am his Account Relationship Officer, and StarBallBunny rabbit did not mention any Next of Kin/ Heir when the account was opened, he was married with two children and his wife and his children all died along with him. Last week my Bank Management requested that Mr StarBallBunny rabbit should give instructions on what to do about his funds, if to renew the contract. I know this will happen and that is why I have been looking for a means to handle the situation, because if my Bank Directors happens to know that Mr StarBallBunny rabbit is dead and do not have any Heir, they will take the funds for their personal use, so I don't want such to happen. That is why I am seeking your co-operation to present you as the Next of Kin/ Heir to the account, since you bear same last name with the deceased customer.

There is no risk involved; the transaction will be executed under a legitimate arrangement that will protect you from any breach of law. It is better that we claim the money, than allowing the Bank Directors to take it, they are rich already. I am not a greedy person, so I am suggesting we share the funds in this ratio, 60/40%, and am also going to invest my 60% in your country.Let me know your mind on this and please do treat this information highly confidential. We shall go over the details once I receive your urgent response in my private email address ([email protected]) Have a nice day and I am anticipating your response.

Regards

Waiting to hear from you.

Thanks,

Mr. Peter Williams
Tel: +233 543494482
Email: [email protected]

iklboo · 11/08/2012 19:24

Had some fecker try to hack into my Wells Fargo bank account recently. I didn't even know they had a branch on Salford Precinct Grin.

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