AIBU To Elbow Toddlers Out of My Way??!!

[Latara]

In the rush to get to the ice cream van?
Or is that a bit mean?
(It's on the estate & coming this way!! Full of ice cream & old skool Cider lollies & lemonade lollies & cola ones too!!)

Well, you would have to crawl along to get your elbows at the right height, might cost you more in speed than it is worth ...

What are cider lollies? Never had those.

Fuck I want a cider lolly now!

YANBU

Kick the fuckers to the side of the path

If one can't push to the front of the ice cream queue in front of a bunch of kiddies then I see no benefit to being an adult.

For cider lollies YANBU.

Barking like a mad dog is more effective though, makes them scatter.

Cider lollies? Fucking YUM!

Don't elbow the kids out of the way, just stand on them.

Oh yes. I forgot my elbows are too high to get toddlers. But i can elbow their parents...

Cider lollies - they now sell them in my local Tesco.
I do live in Dorset though.
Wonder if they have Whisky lollies in Scotland?

Don't think I've seen any Whisky lollies!

That would be for your hard-core toddler ...

just trample the little blighters what are cider lollies do they have cider in them oh i wonder if i could make my own lolly .

no whisky lollies in scotland sadly

Or just wait until the toddlers have got their ice creams then snatch it out of their hands and eat the evidence
no, not really, I am being facetious

Our ice cream lady pissed me off one day, she goes down the street then back, so as she went down, no3 son got his money out, ran outside, and waited for her to come back. As she came back, he waved like mad and she waved back and drove straight past leaving him crying at the side of the road

I've never checked the label for alcohol content; but IF the van EVER turns up in my street then i'll let you know....

Honestly. What's taking him so long?!

Cider lollys yum! My grandad was an ice cream man, I was really sad when he retired ( I was 30)

No young kids in my street any more all auld duffers but I used to almost cry when a certain little boy used to go to the van and i was behind him he never knew what he wanted always ummed and ahhhed i used to race to get there before him he is now a big lad and still umms and ahhh s but he is bigger than me now so he can go first

Oh god I want a cider lolly now... My ears are going to be on elastic for the ice cream man, not heard him come round yet today! I'm not sure he has them though :( in which case it'll have to be a lemonade Sparkle. If he hasn't got those, we might have to have stiff words.

People in Scotland cant leave whisky alone for long enough for it to freeze! (am Scottish)

No, no it has to be Cherry Brandy lollies.

YANBU to elbow the brats there have to be some perks to being an adult

Surely kneeing them out of the way would be more realistic? Reminds me of this website

But I don't know how many 5 year olds I can take as chuffing IT has the results behind a firewall

A pointy brolly is far better.

Abs That website is hilarious (lax IT here thank fuck). One of my favourite questions:

During the fight, would you feel morally comfortable picking up a child and
using him/her as a weapon to throw at other children?

OK, calm down everyone, no need for any of that you simply go up to the van and lean over the top of all the shortarses milling around below you and, with your superior arm length, hand your money to the icecream man first. and ignore the cries of indignation--. All's fair in love and ice-cream war.

This my favourite:
"How would you feel about the fact that you're fighting a bunch of kids?
a) This is so wrong - these are children for pete's sake. I don't think I could fight them, even in self defense.
b) I'll do what I have to and fight just hard enough to win
c) To hell with morality, I'd be too busy pile-driving, crane-kicking, and bare-knuckle bashing them all the way back to kintergarten "