AIBU to think that an 11 and a 9 year old are not too old

[Helltotheno]

to start learning a musical instrument and become good at it? I ask because I seem to be surrounded by people who are adamant that children need to start learning three instruments an instrument at 4 or they'll never learn one well.

Stories please from people whose kids have been older starting music and become good/enjoyed it enough to keep it up.

Also, how vital is theory? E.g. if a child is learning guitar, should they be doing a separate theory lesson?

Hellto Tthanks for this thread! my DS is only 2 but loves music and spends all his time singing and dancing, so I've wondered (because I don't want to start him off on anything too young) - when I should do more musical things with him.

I think as well as the physical aspects of when a child is ready/able to play an instrument well, there's the social aspects. I played piano for a long time but got bored of it around grade 4 because I found it lonely practicing and playing alone. I played 'Cello after that and for much longer because I loved playing in a string quartet, and the school orchestra. I enjoyed the feeling of joint-creation that I also love about singing in a choir - I'm just not a solitary genius of any kind so for me, an instrument that fits into a band would have worked better. Wish I'd had the chance to learn guitar - I'm 32 and have been teaching myself ukulele for about a year- now I'm almost good!

Do they want to learn an instrument?

Well they've both expressed an interest in doing something music-wise, though kids are notoriously fickle or maybe that's just mine and I don't typically put much store in what they say they want! I really think before teenage years, there's a certain amount of guiding them into things that has to be done surely. I certainly didn't know what I wanted at that age.... and that's a good example cos I can now say that while I enjoyed all the work I put into piano, and wouldn't have said I didn't want it, I'm now very disappointed that all that slog wasn't really of any use.

Somebody mentioned above about the practice and the discipline of it giving a good work ethic and I agree with that completely... that's one thing I did take from it, that if you work hard, you can aim towards things/achieve things.

Still can't accompany you all in a rousing rendition of 'Greensleeves' though... oh well

I am 40 and started playing the piano at 35! I have just passed grade 3. So you are never too old. My only wish is that I had more time to practice. I had to learn from scratch as I didn't read music at all. I would never have stuck at it if my parents had started me off as a kid. My 7 y.o. DD has just started and she only practices if told to or if I'm playing which drives me nuts.

No of course all kids need a bit of parental nagging encouragement and guidance, but it must help if they have some interest or aspirations themselves! I just wondered if the idea had come more from them, or from you.

As for picking the right instrument, it's really difficult to say until you try. I learned violin and piano, and somehow the piano suited me much better and it's the one I've kept playing as an adult. I did try to keep up the violin as well, and played a bit in amateur orchestras, but somehow I just don't seem to have the same motivation or ability with it. No idea why though.

Not too old at all, it's to do with how much you practise - what you put in, you get out. I'd say theory is important as it helps with understanding music far more than just the technical aspects of hitting the right notes.

I agree about never being too old. There are lots of inspiring stories on here!

There has been a spate of books recently about how the key to success in anything is practice rather than innate talent - you need to do 10,000 hours of practice to achieve expertise in a discipline. I recently read the Matthew Syed book about this, Bounce, and he says the reason you get so many child "prodigies" is that they've simply had longer to do the practice. If you start playing the piano at 4, then you can put in an awful lot of hours by the age of 10. (Ditto tennis, chess, whatever.) His argument is that the reason adults rarely acquire expertise in, say, a musical instrument is not because the brain stagnates but because adults just don't have the time to put in 10,000 hours.

I reckon 11 and 9 are actually very good ages at which to start learning an instrument, as long as they have the motivation.

My DS taught himself to play guitar at 13

I just wondered if the idea had come more from them, or from you

Well being totally honest, I don't doubt that some of this does come from me... and typically I'm not a pushy parent, maybe even too much the other way most times. It just pains me that I actually did/do have some musical ability but it's never found expression. I don't want them saying the same thing when they're older.
My idea was that I'd at least start them, try and keep them interested/practising for a couple years, then see if they're motivated enough to continue themselves, or want to branch out into another instrument that suits them better, and self-teach, as people have already said.

Along with that, I'm sort of thinking I could take up something like guitar myself, esp cos I could figure out the theory quickly enough, having already done it. It sounds from the various posts, like other people have learned successfully as adults.

Oh go on OP, learn the guitar! I think you'd love it. And your DCs will see first-hand how regular practise will help you to improve and how enjoyable learning an instrument can be. I bet you they'll want you to show them how to play the chords etc!

Am thinking the other way round VolAuVent, they'll teach me!
But it's a nice idea, no matter what. Lots of encouraging stories on this thread :)

I started about 7 on the piano. I had no aptitude at all and hated it. My sister started that age and did really well though.

My DH started playing Guitar at 30 and can now play repetitive blues riffs ad nauseum!

You need to practise a LOT - the reason you can't play the piano now is because you stopped.

Let them choose what they want to play.

It's never too late, I started at 40

I have a musical daughter.... Started playing at 6 and is progressing steadily. BUT - I read somewhere that whilst she is doing very well, kids who start later and progress quickly can be more successful, and get better places on music courses at uni.

Guitar is easy to teach yourself.The majority of guitarists are self taught

My first ever post written just to say - no, definitely not too old! I started to play guitar at 14 and now teach it; allegedly Eric Clapton didn't start learning it till he was 17...

Orchestral instruments mean they can join local youth bands and orchestras, We have ones locally that they can join very early on. It really encourages practise and interest.

I think bands and orchestras are the key to kids enjoying practicing - they see what they're practicing for!

Most of the people I know who play (as amateurs) as adults are in local colliery bands, or play in a church band or a have a weekly pub/folk gig or something.

Mum had a "get to grade 3 and then you can give up" rule with any instrument. She never liked it when we gave up, but thought by grade 3 we would know enough about the instrument and our lives that we could chuck it in without feeling guilty.

I am extremely glad that I've gone through life knowing how to read music as a result of learning piano aged 8-12. Several times I've been able to accompany someone on piano because I could pick up the tune, I love being able to sightread while singing, and it's brill. But even better, imo, is something like the guitar, because they are everywhere and it's a social instrument. Kids take guitars places and hang out with them and go to open mic nights and stuff. It's a social plus for a teenager, which makes it slightly more likely they'll stick with it, I suppose! I know about 30% of the reason I quit 'Cello was I hated dragging it up and down 3 flights of stairs and on and off the school bus! :)

My brother learnt piano and violin from the age of 7. He then took up trombone at 12. By 18 he had grade 8 with distinction in trombone, bass trombone and grade 7 violin and piano. He played trombone in the NYO and at the Royal Academy of Music. He now doesn't play much but is in a jazz band for the trombone.

Singing in a choir is a great way to develop all-round musicianship too. If you pick one where there are no auditions it won't matter if your DC can't currently sing in tune as with a good choir director they'll absorb the skills they need to do so :)

Can play the piano, but my instrument of choise is the Bodhran. Spent 15yrs playing the thing and could master a beat on it to almost any song, that includes a lot of rock songs.

I spent almost 30yrs trying to read music and still can't do it to this day. I always play by ear now as I've realised that no matter how many more years I spend reading music, I just won't get it. It still takes me 5mins to decipher 1 note.

Just to say, re practice, David Oistrach used to cut his strings so he wouldn't have to practise, as none could be bought over the weekend in communist Russia.

Just because he hated to practise didn't stop him from becoming one of the greatest violinists of his time.