to have taken my sister to visit our cousin after my mum said no

[biddysmama]

start off by saying my sister is 20! she is a student and lives at my mums

our (2nd?, my mums cousin)cousin, who we are both close to has been sectioned,she is in a hospital atm and struggling, my sister wanted to go and see her but mum wouldnt take her because she said its not nice and she wouldnt want to see her like that

my sister couldnt get their herself (no bus up there and she doesnt drive)

so i took her today when i went to visit, it cheered our cousin up which i knew it would and now my sister feels better because she was worrying about her

my mums gone mad! she said no, she said she wasnt to go

or is it a case of "you live under my roof, you follow my rules"?

What? Your mum is being U.

You should do the best thing for your cousin. Probably make her feel bad if she knew your mum 'wouldn't want to see her like that' Could be nice for your cousin to know people care!

YANBU
If your sister was a child, then it would have been your mum's decision. But your sister is an adult.
There is such a stigma about mental illness - yet it is so common. I think it's lovely that you and your sister both wanted to support your cousin. I'm sure that she really appreciated it, and I hope that you're both able to visit her again.

i cant go and see her much becuase i have young children that i cant take with me but she has her mobile with her and i chat to her alot,text her all day and she can get hold of me if she needs me

YANBU, your sister is an adult.

Hardly the padded cell and straight jacket scenario of years ago now is it.

If your sister had been under 16 I would have said, your mums daughter, her rules. 16-18, I would have got splinter on my arse from sitting on the fence. 18+ certainly your sisters decision, though I think your mum was just trying to protect her from something unpleasant.

YANBU!

YANBU

And you are being caring and compasionate.

You did the right thing, she's a grown woman and can do what she wants. I don't understand why your mum went off on one though, I can understand her worrying and saying 'you won't like it, it won't be nice' but to be angry after the event? Why, when your sister obviously was fine being there and seeing your cousin? She sounds controlling for the sake of being controlling.

'my sister wanted to go and see her'

And that is why YANBU.

YANBU. Your sister is an adult and her cousin is a relative so she is perfectly at liberty to express concern and visit.

Sounds like your mum has a problem accepting mental illness?

You did the right thing.