...to think it is rude to invite someone to come visiting with you?

[Stardust01]

Supposed to be having a friend of mine round after work tomorrow for dinner.

Friend just texted me to say she is looking forward to it and 'X is coming too if that's alright?'. X is a mutual friend and we have all known each other a long time, but we are not super-close anymore and see each other every few weeks.

This is rude, right? I mean we all know each other but we sometimes do spend time just with one of the others, not always as a group.

It isn't really that I don't want X to come, but I was looking forward to just spending time with other friend. And I've been put in an impossible position because I can't really say no without snubbing X. And not only that, it wasn't 'Is it ok if X comes?', but presented as a done deal.

Am I being unreasonable to think that it is not ok to just invite other friends along when you've been invited for dinner at someone else's house?

YANBU but your friend obviously feels that you are all a bit more cosy and comfortable than you actually are so I'd let it slide.I'm sure you'll still have fun tomorrow :)

YANBU that is rude. If you had wanted to invite x surely you would have done it yourself.

Yes: guests having guests is a total PITA and I would consider it rude unless there were exceptional extenuating circumstances. If the perpetrator were young, I'd consider it a sign of gaucheness, rather than deliberate rudeness (IYSWIM).

yanbu - drives me mad! Someone I thought of as a close friend (saw at least once a week) asked to come and meet my new, poorly, prem ds in scbu. I said yes, and explained that only short visits allowed for select few to minimise infections etc. She replied with 'ok - me, dp and dd (12) will be there on Sunday' She got a bit arsey when I said her dp and ds couldn't come and I've seen her 3 times in 6 monthe. Ho hum...

yanbu.

if you'd have wanted the friend to come you would have asked her yourself!

If this is a close friend that you have asked to dinner why don't you tell her that you were looking forward to a 1:1 catch-up and ask her would it be possible to put other friend off and maybe suggest another night when you all get together?

Can you get in touch and say you've bought the food but only enough for the two of you.

Then contact X and say the same thing but promise to catch up with her soon.