To ask you what you call your vegetables??

[JumpingThroughHoops]

In the supermarket, I heard voice say ''pass me a butt plug for Daddy'' , turned round to see her being handed a butter nut squash by, presumably, her daughter.

I confess, I did inwardly snigger affect a look of moral outrage. But unfortunately, butter nuts will now be forever known as butt plugs.

People mispronounce yoghurt?

yeah, they all say yog (rhymes with jog)-urt, instead of yo (rhymes with go)-hurt. Daft brits.

parsnips = spud noses (bob the builder fans)
Runner beans = Squeekies.

surely all butternut squash are called Raymond?

I say both yaw-gurt and yoh-gurt depending on my mood. I'm odd that way.

All carrots here are called Cecily Sprouts.

spring onions is scallions in North east. turnip is the big yellow one and swede is the little white one. I am now in SW and its all 'wrong' I am posh now and say spring onions and have totally given up on the turnip argument.

Swede and turnip are different veg

I dont see how anyone can get confused.

Jumping
Because in the North/Scotland, neeps = swede

Everyone is confused. In England swede is one and turnip is another. In Ireland and Scotland the words are applied the opposite way around, so to us a swede is what you call a turnip and vice versa. Swede is only short for swedish turnip anyway so its not much of a leap.

Not vegetable related but I do refer to the Baby Bjorn as the Strap On

Sprouts = baby cabbages
Broccoli = little trees
Cauliflower = snow trees

It's not disguise as such, just a bit of fun with the DCs.

Yep, NE roots here and scallions is definitely used, but more for the big fat spring onions. But it is an Irish word and there was always a lot of Irish ancestry in the NE. Me Granda was from Durham, but his grandparents were Irish catholic, came over during the potato famine in the mid-1880s.
The word 'scallion' went to America when the Irish left in droves after the famine.