to not want my children around my sisters new dog

[LivingThings]

Namechanged sorry

I live a long way from my sister and had mentioned I might visit the parents soon and was she and her kids around etc. She said yes meet the new puppy etc. I asked what breed and she said Akita.

AIBU to not want my 2 and 3 year olds meeting an Akita (ok its a puppy but still) They have no experience of dogs and DS is terrified of them.

As an aside Dsis has owned dogs for 20+ years but I have to say she has never managed any sort of obidience training with any of them, rarely walks them (live in garden) and has never had a challenging breed like this before ( apart from a collie that had to be returned to the RSPCA)

yanbu your just not

If your DSis was responsible enough to do the obedience training etc then I'd think YWBU but if she just lets her dogs run riot then I don't think YABU.

Dogs, especially well behaved ones can be a childs best friend

• Though I did cuddle maul my Granddads Rottweiler when I was a toddler. Softest dog I've ever met

There are two issues here I think

1. Your sister doesn't look after her animals properly/train them.

2. Your DS is 'terrified' of dogs.

Forget the breed here because any untrained/mistreated dog can cause damage if they lash out.

YANBU for not wanting your kids around an untrained/mistreated animal

But YABU if you don't help your child to overcome his 'terror' of dogs.

How and why did he become so terrified?

I do not think you are BU depite being a dog lover / owner that likes to see dogs and dc coexist. ;-). An akita , is a big/ strong breed and a puppy will prob not yet be trained sufficiently as well as still being boistrous ... and could easily knock over toddlers.

If DS is terrified then there should be no pressure on him or you to meet the pup. While it might be ok ... and it could be a chance to "make friends" ..... I hope you and sis can come to some sort of agreement as to how / when and if they meet.

The breed is irelvant. If your child is scared of dogs forcing it to spend time with a boisterous puppy in a strange environment won't help you help him stop being scared

Will your sis understand? Most decent dogowners would.

From your description, your sister is being unreasonable to have the dog in the first place. If she can't train a collie, she cannot train an akita. Hopeless

and I came on this thread to tell you yabu, because dogs are great when they're well trained and obedient

Are you going to her house? Or was she planning on bringing the dog to your parents?

If you're going to her house I don't see what you can do. Its not up to you what pets she has and you can't expect her to only have animals you aprove of.

If she was thinking of bringing the dog with her to your parents then that's different.

YAAbsolutelyNBU.

What worra said - absolutely agree (except that an Akita's a particularly bad choice if she's not up to training it properly - unfair on the dog )

A neighbour's son has an Akita - the softest thing you can imagine, and as a puppy looked like a teady bear. But then that dog is well trained.

Why on earth, given your sister's iffy record with dogs, has she chosen an Akita of all breeds?

I don't think YABU to be cautious but actually, I do think that you need to do something about your ds's terror of dogs. I'm not suggesting that meeting your sister's dog is going to be the best way to try and calm his fears but he's not going to be able to avoid dogs altogether and the sooner you attempt to overcome his fear, the better.

I am utterly speechless. An Akita is a very high maintenance dog which needs strict... very strict pack leadership from it's owner - this is not a breed to be trifled with. MIL is an ex-dog handler and has two. They are absolutely wonderful dogs but she is with them 24/7. Apparently some breeders say they don't need much exercise compared to other large breeds but MIL maintains that is absolute bollocks - they need a lot to keep them calm, happy and non-confrontational. We all know that all dogs are potentially dangerous - an Akita is like giving an AK-47? to someone who doesn't know what they are doing.
I do find your post particularly relevant as it seems that round our way anyway, the Akita is usurping the Staffie as the 'go to dog' for making you look hard. Before anyone flames me, both dogs are excellent breeds and make fabulous pets when highly trained, socialised and cared for properly.

Yep beautiful dog but unfortunately the new local chav accessory here too.:(

What Worra said. Verbatim.

If you have a bad feeling about this, then do not do it: If anything were to happen, how bad would you feel for ignoring that little voice saying 'Dont do it!'

Lots of toddlers / young children become 'scared' of dogs - I think it's part of development and generally they grow out it.... Unless they have a bad experience such as meeting your sisters untrained dog or being 'encouraged' to see something they think is scary as being nice.

If DS was 5/6 or older I would've saying to start forcing the issue but aged 2/3 - let him be, comfort without fuss when scared and make sure he has good experiences....

Doesn't sound like your sis dog will cut the mustard

YANBU

Your sister does not sound like she should own dogs at all, let alone more challenging breeds.

You should socialise your children to dogs though, do you know anyone with a well-trained/socialised dog?

yanbu. My ils are dog lovers and i'm very wary about my girls being around their dogs. Dogs can be loving and great companions but they can also be temperamental, unpredictable and dangerous. Put your child/children first in every situationa nd you can't go wrong.