to wonder how large families cope?

[wannabedomesticgoddess]

As DP has just started a new job (paying a bit more than his last one) we have been looking at our finances. With already one toddler in the house and a baby on the way, I am really panicking about money. The pay rise has put us just out of qualifying for HB. So all we get now is CB and some tax credits. But the pay rise isnt equal to the amount we have lost IYSWIM.

Im not judging anyone at all. Im genuinely interested in how families with two or more DCs cope when only one parent is working and those wages are pretty much the only income?

Surely when xmas and birthdays come round its a struggle? We live in a modest house, the cheapest we could find for what we need. We have went down to one car as DPs job is closer to home now. I make meal plans etc and stay within a budget for food. But at the end of the month there is basically nothing left. DP has holes in his shoes fgs!!

How do people live reasonably comfortably without getting into debt and still manage to save a bit each month for a rainy day?

We've been "docked" a bit over £200 a month on the tax credits from this month :( It's a combination of no2 son reaching 18 and whatever it is the government is up to. I expect worse things happen at sea

I agree with other posters - I do Christmas bit by bit. I already have DD's presents, so now I will move onto DS2, then DS1.

We also have a water meter and spend very little on gas/electricity. We have pushed our grocery bills down to £90 a week, when they were £150.

We have 4 DC's. For about 2 years (when DS2 was aged between 2-4) we had 1 income. Our older 3 kids were all 'little' (i.e at primary school) so were cheaper to run in some respects (child sized clothes, no bus fares, smaller meals, no 'social' lives...)

Long walks, trips to the park, the local library were all godsends. We've only ever had 1 car (our current vehicle is a 20 year old volvo estate) We've always meal planned, shopped around and have second hand/hand me down furniture and clothes

We have 2 incomes now, but TBH my income has been eaten up by rises in the cost of utilities/food, the kids getting bigger/older/more expensive. Secondary school uniforms, sports kits, bus fares etc all eat into the budget.

When you have little kids it's a lot easier to live on a budget and cut costs. As for stuff like christmas - I start planning that NOW!! I'm good at christmas/birthday planning - and I do think my kids will look back on some fantastic christmases. Where I'm a bit crap is with holidays. We were very lucky a few years ago, my mom lived overseas so we had 'free' holidays, since she came back to the UK we've had 2 soggy camping trips!

I think if you have more than (say) 2 kids it is going to be expensive whether you work or stay at home. Work - you pay for childcare, stay at home you lose an income and when they get to 13+ they eat money.

Hex thanks - will check re hardship fund.
Forgot who said about free school transport but we only get it to nearest comp here. All faith and grammar school transport must be paid for. Only option is private bus which is £1500, payable monthly. Hence panic!

Anyway, not going to hijack this thread any more, but thanks for all advice and glad to know am not on my own. You guys are great.

Foad, my DD2 is at a grammar school where we have to pay for a 'school bus' - there is no LA help/assistance/bus passes for this. However it's 'only' £750 a year, paid monthly.

I know for my DD's school there is an 'old girls' society who help with costs for things. Transport costs should not be a barrier to your child attending - how disgraceful in this day and age that you have to worry about this. It's positively victorian. Speak to the school, the LA, everyone. I do hope that somehow you get your sums to add up. I know that the initial uniform costs etc nearly broke us when our DD's got into grammar schools.

I intend to get a job like you have suggested hexagonal, working nights maybe and paying for only a couple of mornings childcare a week or something. But at the minute Im stuck with being pregnant, and my main worry is getting heating oil, then the baby coming, then xmas soon after.

We have no extra income at all until tax credits get sorted so cant start planning xmas yet.

I think we will be investing in an eco ball. They sound good!!

I think its a shame that we all have to go to such lengths to get by. When you really think about it, most of us probably arent having the "quality" of life we should. The costs of living are pricing us out of having kids!!

Some really great ideas on here though! You are all fab!

Really hope things improve financially soon for you wannabe. I am certain that they will get better and better for you as it seems like you are really determined that they will :)

foad is there anyway your DS could travel there by public bus? We are 2.9 miles from DD1's school, so we didn't qualify for the free school bus (even though those that live three doors down the road from us do), and DD travels each day by public bus. I buy her a monthly bus pass at a cost of £11 per month and it picks her up from a bus stop virtually opposite our house and she gets off at a stop right outside her school gate. How far away is the school? Would you be able to take your DS there each day by car and pick him up each evening? Or lift share with other families? Could he cycle there?

£1500 per year sounds an absolute rip-off and it sounds as though the school is trying to cash in on its sought-after status. We can buy annual bus tickets for DD to use the school bus that the other pupils gets for free and I thought this was pricey at £350 per year but £1500 absolutely takes the mickey.