To think gay is not a pejorative

[arthurfowlersallotment]

It makes me wince when I hear people say 'urgh that's gay' to indicate something negative. Especially when it's an adult.

YANBU. Rather than wince though how about asking "So, what's wrong with being gay?" in a nice neutral tone. I've used it before and the responses have been shamed faces and apologies.

I think it's become so casual that people don't realise what they're saying. But it's ridiculous.

Its very 'teen speak' - how ever I remember when gay meant happy. So words alter meanings through time.

I hear DS talking on computer games with his friends. One of his friends from another school says it frequently, which is then followed by an awkward silence from the kids from DS's school, where it would be unacceptable to say it.

I think if teens are in a school environment where saying it isn't dealt with, they don't realise how they are being viewed by others in the rest of society. It really isn't any different from slurs about disabled people or racist slurs.

I agree Peaks, I think it should be as unacceptable as racist slurs. It's insidious and nasty and makes me sad when I hear it.

I heard someone on Radio Four recently criticising this use of gay. And then today I heard a grown woman use it that way.

I'm ashamed to say I do it, and I'm gay!!!

YANBU

Well I've got to say....spend a night in canal street, you'll here it a lot. They aren't offending themselves. My brother uses it all the time, so do his "friends".

It counts as homophobia in my school and would be challenged depending on the teacher
I don't have any friends who say it as I don't hang out with teenagers!

my teenage ds uses it - I hate it. It's interesting that the gay community use it though.

I don't know what the [:s] is for. Personally I think it's awfully teen and I hate it yanbu.

But I can't come over all outraged at how offensive it it to gay people. When all the gay people I know, of which there are many. Are the most prolific users of the word in the context described.

Mrs Hannibal will know what I mean.....

I don't know any gay people who do that. But I'm not on Canal Street.

It is tricky if gay people use the word (in the 'that's so gay' sense) themselves. I've known children say things like 'going for a chinky isn't offensive, my pal xxx is Chinese and he says that". Makes it harder to challenge, but doesn't make it right - equally when women use sexist terms about women in their own conversations.

I've not heard anybody who is gay using it and I have spent nights out on Canal Street.

In my experience the people who are most offended by it are straight!

I shouldn't do it, when I think about it properly of course I shouldn't. And yes its very teenagery but in my defense it was only last year I was a teenager.

I guess the only way to explain it is that in that context it doesn't mean the same thing. Ridiculous I know but a hard habit to break.

It's probably one of the biggest gay villages in the uk. It was an example....Its ironic really given the thread. That the most I hear that word in that context....is ummm from gay people. More so men than women.

Although the whole Canal Street example is making this seem like we're filling in questionnaires for a Geography field trip!

My friend's brother had an awful time when he came out at school (in the north of Ireland) where his classmates often said stuff was gay this, gay that. I think it should be no more tolerated than racism, sexism or some other ism that I can't think of.

I don't think the term is right. But Hannibal is right. I know many, many gay people who use the term. Who don't find it offensive and find it bizzare "straight" people have to feel offended for them.

That said there will be gay people who don't. I just found it ironic really I guess. The most prolific users I know of that term, are well gay.

Are, well, gay. Awful place to miss a comma

The question is,' said Humpty Dumpty, which is to be master -- that's all.'

OP it really shouldn't be, the Equality Act puts a duty on schools (and other organisations) to not accept harassment or discrimination relating to any protected characteristic, of which sexual orientation is one.
I don't see how it can be a good thing for a young person to know that gay 'means' bad/crap etc, before they've come to realise that gay is also the label given to their own sexual orientation

I have never heard an adult say it tbh.

Though dh remembers being told he was "well gay" when he was the first in his year at school to get a girlfriend. You have to laugh at the stupidity of it really!

Well I feel offended when I hear racist or sexist commentary. Not on behalf of anyone I should point out. But rather it makes me very uncomfortable. Like watching a UKIP march.