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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be really annoyed about crap arrangements re meeting friends

18 replies

newmummytobe79 · 27/07/2012 18:05

Bit of background before rant! Wink

A friend suggested a night out (I was very happy about this as usually I'm the organiser)

We all decided on a date (3 months down the line as most have kids/full on jobs etc)

All goes quiet re arrangements so via email I ask where everyone wants to go - no response, except from one friend and it's a negative to the place I suggest

The place I suggest is equal distance to us all and easy to get to via train/bus etc

3 days before we go out I am yet to hear from anyone (and remember I didnt suggest the night out in the first place) so I suggest X time at local meeting point so we can all let our parents/child minders know what time they'll be needed from, and then suggest we pick a destination when we're all together

2 friends out of 6 reply that suggestion sounds great

Night before, 1 friends has a better offer and won't be coming, and another now decides that it'd be good for us to meet at her house.

I've arranged to go for a drink with my brother an hour before meeting friends in the said area so now have to change my plans, or meet my brother and get a taxi to said friends house

AIBU to be pissed off that after all the faffing around, I make a decision as no-one else can, and now it's all changed the night before?

Piss up in a brewery springs to mind!

Also a wwyd please!

I'll have a Wine whilst I wait for your views Thanks

OP posts:
LentillyFart · 27/07/2012 18:08

At this point >>> 3 days before we go out I am yet to hear from anyone - I would have bailed. It was obviously never going to go ahead so I'm afraid YA a bit BU - you were the only one taking the arrangement seriously and you probably shouldn't have.

MammaTJ · 27/07/2012 18:09

I would get new friends!! Wine

Original poster
newmummytobe79 · 27/07/2012 18:11

But it is going ahead still - and half of me says just go to friends house and meet brother another time, yet the other half says stick to my guns and say 'this was the time/place so why change it now'

Think I'm just a tad p*ssed off that my decision is now being questioned when for weeks no-one else could make one!

OP posts:
Original poster
newmummytobe79 · 27/07/2012 18:12

and fwiw - I do love my friends, and I know they're all busy (as am I!) ... just currently annoyed!

OP posts:
NimpyWindowMash · 27/07/2012 18:14

Very annoying, but i find trying to get a large group together often results in a few last minute bailouts. Personally I would 9 times out of 10 just go with the flow. But if it's a repeat offender who is always messing up arrangements then I might mention to them that it is inconsiderate.

LindyHemming · 27/07/2012 18:15

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

kickingKcurlyC · 27/07/2012 18:17

Er, are you me?

ginmakesitallok · 27/07/2012 18:20

I had similar last week - work colleagues faffing about about whether or not they'd be going to the pub. I just said - well I'll be in x pub at about , see you there if you're there. Everyone turned up and a good night had by all.

Original poster
newmummytobe79 · 27/07/2012 18:20

kickingKcurlyC fancy going for a Wine! Grin

OP posts:
ginmakesitallok · 27/07/2012 18:20

"at about 7"

Gumby · 27/07/2012 18:20

er it's your fault

why arrange to meet your brother vor a drink when you've known for three months you're seeing friends

Original poster
newmummytobe79 · 27/07/2012 18:20

ginmakesitallok that's what I'm hoping happens! :)

OP posts:
Original poster
newmummytobe79 · 27/07/2012 18:22

Gumby I've arranged to meet my brother for an hour before meeting them to catch up. Suggested to him the same pub that meeting friends in and then he's going off somewhere else. I don't see the problem in that?

OP posts:
Gumby · 27/07/2012 18:25

well

I think it's best npot to mix arrangements like thnat cos they're bound to be early or whatever

anyway hope you have a nice time

NeedlesCuties · 27/07/2012 18:48

You must be friends with the social circle I used to move in.

I remember we had made plans to go to a certain place to celebrate the birthday of a friend - it was somewhere she really liked so we all agreed to meet and head there. Got to the meeting point and one friend said, "Ohh, I was at X last night for dinner already, could we go to Y instead?" Cheeky mare!

People can be strange.

Latara · 27/07/2012 22:30

Yes it would be nice if people could be a bit more impulsive tbh especially MY friends!! because life is short (& can be quite boring & lonely when your single).

Mayisout · 28/07/2012 08:27

Go and try to find out why these arrangements are so difficult - then maybe you can all sort something easier in future.

3duracellbunnies · 28/07/2012 08:49

Well maybe the babysitter has let the other person down, or their children won't settle not that I'm looking at you ds and otherwise she wouldn't be able to go. It's probably my age, but I quite like going to other people's houses because it is cheaper, sometimes we do a pot luck supper, we can all hear each other and no one is hovering over us trying to increase their profits.

If is just you and her left now I would tactfully suggest rearranging until more people are around. We tend not to meet in school holidays anyway as people are randomly away. We do sometimes change location at the last minute as for most people the location isn't particularly important, but obviously for you this time it is, so just say to the other friend that as you have already made plans to meet your bro at the pub before, it would be better for you to make the night another time, and maybe a few others will be around then too.

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