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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to still be pissed of with my friend

18 replies

gallifrey · 27/07/2012 10:03

Our daughters are friends and we used to live next door to each other, her dd (8) has spent a lot of time round my house and I've taken her out a lot so I know her quite well.
In short she isn't a very nice little girl, she is very spoilt and has a lot of stuff and most of her conversation seems to be what she has got, and what she is getting. She is the sort of child that comes round and plays a game, halfway through announces she's bored and doesn't want to play any more.
My dd used to get quite upset with her but over the years has learnt how to deal with her.

I'm quite good friends with her mum and we also both have younger children so meet up quite often in the park etc.

Anyway, the other day our children fell out about something, which somehow escalated into us (the grown ups!) having a row about who's fault it was. We both believe our own child's version of events obviously!
She text me a few hours later asking if we were still friends, to which I replied yes of course.

This was 3 days ago now and I'm still quite annoyed about it, I don't know if I can see her without bringing it up again.

OP posts:
AKMD · 27/07/2012 10:05

YABU, you had a row, you said you're now BFFs again so get over it.

rainydaysarebad · 27/07/2012 10:07

You don't sound like a very nice friend. Why meet someone if you hate their kid? You made friends again, yet you're still holding a grudge. I suggest you make friends with someone you like.

pictish · 27/07/2012 10:07

Depends - we need more details. Overall I'd say it's daft to fall out over kids...but it depends on the circs.

gallifrey · 27/07/2012 10:08

No you are right, I should really get over it!

OP posts:
fanoftheinvisibleman · 27/07/2012 10:09

And this is exactly why it is utterly ridiculous to join in the childrens arguments. They will have long forgotten it whilst you are still stewing over it.

Best piece of advice I ever had was never to fall out with friends over the children.

fanoftheinvisibleman · 27/07/2012 10:09

And this is exactly why it is utterly ridiculous to join in the childrens arguments. They will have long forgotten it whilst you are still stewing over it.

Best piece of advice I ever had was never to fall out with friends over the children.

Olympicnmix · 27/07/2012 10:17

You row over your children's friendships? Blimey! Yes, not only forget it but apologise for getting involved in the first place. Role-play in your head how you could have handled that the adult way, so next time it happens - and it will - you know how you want to conduct yourself.

Floggingmolly · 27/07/2012 10:56

Grow up, ffs! Your eight year olds fell out and you rowed over who's fault t was? Hmm

dexter73 · 27/07/2012 12:36

Well knowing 8yo girls it was probably both their fault. They fall out over ridiculous things so just ignore it in the future and make up with your friend.

Abbicob · 27/07/2012 12:41

Do not fall out over the kids. The kids will be friends again next week and where does that leave you. It's not worth it

TroublesomeEx · 27/07/2012 14:30

You don't sound like a very nice friend. Why meet someone if you hate their kid?*

I think that's a bit harsh! It's quite possible to really like someone but not like one of their children - afterall, children are just people too and I don't like all of them!

Having said that, the point at which adults start getting involved in their children's disputes is the point at which it all goes a bit down hill! I agree that the girls will have long forgotten it whilst you and the other mum are still stewing!

BettySwollocksandaCrustyRack · 27/07/2012 14:41

It's ridiculous to fall out with your friend because your DD's had an arguement - who are the kids here, them or you??

Your friend texted to ask if you're still mates and you said of course.....so why are you still stewing over it. If you're annoyed still then have the balls to tell her and get it sorted.

JustFabulous · 27/07/2012 14:44

Are the girls friends again?

KenLeeeeeee · 27/07/2012 14:47

YABU, grow the fuck up. Next thing you'll be sending someone else back and forth with messages like "I never really liked you anyway"

I wouldn't want to be friends with someone who described my child as "not very nice" behind my back.

usualsuspect · 27/07/2012 14:51

You don't sound like you like her DD very much, maybe she feels the same about your DD?

Lovelynewboots · 27/07/2012 14:57

Childrens arguments, in my experience are usually 6 of one and half a dozen of the other. Forget the childrens argument. It would be far better for you to move on as it sounds like you have quite a good friendship with this woman.

gallifrey · 27/07/2012 17:53

I didn't say I hated her child ffs! I just don't find her a very nice little girl sometimes.
Also her mum is very much aware of what she is like!

Anyway I text my friend and apologised that I overreacted and she was fine and said it was all forgotten.

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 27/07/2012 17:56

It's all a bit silly really

Her child has traits that you don't like and I can guarantee your child will have traits that your friend doesn't like too.

Glad you've both made it up.

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