I know I was rude ...

[tubsywubsy]

In M&S yesterday, queuing at the basket checkout. The woman in front of me put down her basket and walked off. Didn't say anything. The queue moved forward and I walked around her basket to the front of the queue. A voice behind me said "I'm back." so I turned around and looked at her. "And I'm in a frightful hurry." she said. So I looked all innocent and said, "So what do you mean?" "I was here before you." she said. "Oh, I see" I said, "do you want to go in front of me?". I waved her forward and then it popped out... "A 'please' wouldn't go amiss." She looked blankly at me.

I know it's impolite to point out others' rudeness, but I just couldn't help myself. Would you have done the same?

No, I would have just let her go back in her place. Everyone has forgotten something before. I think you were quite mean.

It is really annoying. I usually get the idiot that loads the conveyor then remembers a bajillion items they have forgotten from the furthest end of the store. I stand there like a numpty while they play Supermarket Sweep.

But I never say anything because to be honest I can't be arsed.

You need to get out more!

I would only have taken her place if she'd wandered off and failed to return. It sounded like she returned just in time, so you were a bit rude to her.

Probably not. But i guess she should have said thank you as she went back to her basket.

I would have punched her for saying frightful.

No, I did let her go back in her place, I just was rather taken aback by her peremptory tone.

I probably would have wanted to but wouldn't

I never have a problem with people who ask eg. Would you mind keeping an eye on my basket while I pop to get xx, but wouldn't have liked the assumption the queue would wait for her..

YABU

That's fine as long as you don't mind being spoken to rudely when you forget something.

YWNBU, if she forgot something she should have said to you 'oops i've forgotten something do you mind if i just pop and get it' You, being a reasonable person would have said 'no of course not' and kept her place.

What she did was rude, well done for calling her on it. You were not mean, you let her go back in place, she was presumptive and entitled.

Yes, sparkly, that's it, she didnt ask, she just walked off. She could have just got fed up of waiting. I'm cross with myself for being rude to her.

If she had been at the checkout and her forgetfulness had actually cost you extra time, I would be cheering you.

But what she did made no difference to how long you had to wait, so it was a bit mean of you.

She should have apologised before she left the line though, or at least as soon as she got back.

I think what you did and said sounds perfectly justified! She was very rude in the way that she treated you.

People like you make me mad, you knew she was in front of you, she wasn't holding anyone up by running off to grab something else. It was you who was rude, not her. Then to correct her on her manners, where are your manners?

I would have hoofed her basket out of the way and denied all knowledge when she returned. I certainly wouldn't have let her back in front of me if she hadn't asked me to keep her place before she swanned off!

But then, I live in London, so am clearly a cunt

She didn't have to ask you if you "minded" while she went to get something.

She didn't need to ask you to watch her basket (unless it is a very clever basket who gets upset when people don't notice it dancing).

If she wasn't back when she was you could have gone in front, you got served when you would if she hadn't have gone, so a big fuss about nothing imo.

So you have never ever ever stepped out of a queue to grab something you've forgot, or to chase an unruly toddler, to put something back? I think ywbu, it would never cross my mind to ask permission to leave a queue if I thought it would take me a short amount of time to return, and if someone was in your position I hope I would be courteous enough to not try to slip into there shoes as soon as there backs were returned and expect a thank you for giving them there rightful place

I hope you're representing team GB in the queuing tournament wellwisher

To be honest if she was gone long enough for you to be at the front of the queue - as in started to put your things out ready to be scanned - Then tough look on her part. You can't leave the queue and expect to just be given your place back or at least round here you can't

Depending on how long she was gone, I would have been tempted to make her go after me. As you lose the right to your place when you leave the queue, she definitely should have said please. So you weren't rude.

She could/should have said I'm back, sorry, excuse me please. Rude bitch

YADNBU

She should have asked really or told you that she was going to get something else and would you mind keeping her place.

So...erm. Hmm.

I'm quite surprised that there's so many people who wouldn't say anything to the person behind them . I just thought it was common courtesy to let people waiting (especially if you're next in line to be served) that you're nipping off.

Why should people have to negotiate your basket without you there, I don't usually pull this card, but what if the person behind you was visually impaired or just plain lost in their thoughts and went flying over your shopping?

I can't believe how many people wouldn't have the courtesy to acknowledge the person behind them if they were nipping out of the queue for 1, 10, 30 seconds whatever, it's just basic good manners.