To wonder at what age you have to start giving pocket money?

[Ouluckyduck]

dd1 is eleven, dd2 nearly 9. Neither gets pocket money on a regular basis. They get to keep and spend birthday money as they wish. If they want something like a magazine or sweets they will ask me and I might say use your own money or I might give them a bit, depending on the situation. I figured I would start regular pocket money when they start being more independent, eg going to the cinema or a cafe on their own. My mother thinks it is crucial to give pocke money regularly from about six and is very disappointed with my failure to comply. What do you all do?

I think your Mother is right.

At 11 certainly a child should be able to understand the value of saving, having a set amount of money each week etc..

I am not there yet, my son is too little but when he starts having a interest in buying things I will give him a small amount of pocket money. I think it is a good way for children to start learning about things like saving and budgeting.
You could also link it to household chores if you choose and if gives you something to take away for bad behaviour.

My 6 year old has zero concept of money he thinks there is unlimited amounts of the stuff and would rather have 5 pennies than a £1 coin pocket money would be pointless he'd likely just lose it, i think you know what age is right by your own child

just depends on the child imo, i got pocket money regularly from a young age and im most definitely a spender, not a saver so didn't teach me anything!

Ds 11 doesn't get pocket money, just as and when he needs it/i think he deserves/needs it and obviously if I can afford it.

A friend of mine used to give her ds 13 £10 a week, and she went through a financial rough spot and couldn't afford to give her son pocket money but said it was an iou till she got herself sorted out. By the time she paid him she 'owed' him over £200!

We started before my stepsons understood. They were 6 1/2 and 3 1/2 when we started giving them £1 each per week.

Recently we took them to Homebase to buy garden toys and DSS1 wanted something that cost £30. We said he couldn't afford it and needed to choose something else or share it with his brother. He thought about it for a good five minutes before deciding to ask his brother to get it with him. We grant autonomy over their own toys so this was an important consideration.

It has pretty much cured DSS1's complaining about wanting stuff. He has learnt a lot about the value of money. DSS2 doesn't get it but I hope to catch him before he starts with the entitlement rubbish we had to fight with his brother.

We tried when the kids were younger but they and/or I often forgot meaning I ended up owing them and we could never agree on how many weeks' worth. Or their money would go missing because it had been looked at or compared, or played with or put in a new pot. Or it was put in pockets and then vanished.

I gave up in the end and they really really didn't miss it. DD1 opened a bank account at 11 and I pay in directly from my bank. SO much easier! She manages it really well.

DD2 at 9 now gets it weekly, the novelty of playing with it has long since worn off and she appreciates the value of it much more.

My son started getting pocket money when he was 5-6. He grasped the concept almost immediately. He is now 27 and excellent with money and has quite a bit of savings.

You don't have to give it at all if you don't want to. However I think it's a positive lesson in teaching children to handle money, especially if you don't give in to other requests for things (well, within reason).

The worst person I ever met with money was XP and he told me he never got pocket money, he just asked for things that he wanted, and he usually got given them. This was until he started work, anyway, but he had a really nasty attitude to stuff, he had to have things "now" and also spent horrifying amounts of money on non-material things, takeaways, drink and gambling.

If your current system is working for you then leave it as it is.

Mine are 10 and 8 and I don't give them pocket money regularly. I forget, they forget. When I remember or they ask I give them a fiver. They have a tendency to lose their wallets!

My DS is 8 and money meant nothing to him because someone was always wafting it at him. However, he goes swimming twice a week (lessons) and huffed and moaned and didn't try at all; it was a mega massive trial for all concerned.

So then I star-chart-bribed him. For a good attitude and effort he gets a gold star and a pound per session. If he goes up a grade he get £20. For a poor attitude and/or effort, a red star and nowt. From the start I said it is not to be spent on sweets/cake/crisps or moshi monster cards, but we can go to a toy emporium of choice and buy anything.

It's like a different child. He's made up with himself, his teachers are thrilled, his peers amazed, he went up a grade within 3 weeks of the scheme, he counts up the money, considers what he's spending it on, does the arithmetic in his head, absolutely bob on in terms of considering finances and how soon can he do x. It's put in a money box and the stars go on the chart and when he buys something we write notes (on special paper, in special green ink pen with a nib and an ink bottle and everything Georgian and scribe-y, but only because I have them in already and he's always wanted to get his mitts on them) detailing what he had, what he's taken out and what it is for.

Anyway the point being, what has worked for us is a tie of the cash to striving, in whatever it may be, and plotting its accretion/depletion with due ceremony. The child is thrilled, I tell you.

Ds is 11 and gets pocket money when he does his chores. He can save it or spend it but he knows if he wants to go out at the weekend that he needs to make sure he has enough money. I think he's at an age where he can understand the value of money, saving and budgeting.

I've never given regular pocket money, and its never been much of a problem until recently.

Ds1 goes to cadets and has quite a lot of camps throughout the year. They are very cheap. Ten pound for a weekend, sixty pound for 10 days. The other dcs get money for other luxuries or special occasions.

The problem now is that they are beginning to think we can foot the bill for everything and constantly compare what they have had compared to their siblings.

We have now opened bank accounts and set up standing orders of various amounts. I have estimated how much they need each month plus a bit extra.

This is to help them learn to manage their own finances and decide what is important to them and how to save. So Ds1 will have to pay for cadets weekly plus his trips away. If he blows the money, he won't be able to go. DD will have to pay for her hair and clothes or social events. Ds2 is only ten and doesn't need to pay out as much, but he will get an amount to save up in case he gets to go on holidays with school. He will be able to save up for a few luxuries as well.

I wish I'd started giving regular pocket money earlier, but I couldn't always afford it or I'd promise it for doing chores, but the DCs just began to ask how much would they get paid for every little thing they were asked to do.

My dd is 6yo and recently I have started giving her £1 or £2 depending on how skint I am when she gets 10 gold stars. She gets a gold star for being helpful, doing a useful job, tidying her bedroom etc it feels more right that she earns the pocket money rather than me just giving it to her iyswim?!

You don't have to give pocket money. You should however teach your kids about money and pocket money can be a way of doing this.
I never got pocket money but I'm still really careful with money (so much so it really winds DH up). I think this came from the fact that once I turned 16 if I wanted stuff then I had to pay for it myself & that included university & college. (I had several jobs pre uni and at uni - as fully self funded)
From 12-16 if I wanted stuff outside of the clothes my mum bought me I did chores for people (not my parents) walking dogs, grooming horses, babysitting, washing cars etc.
I suspect that we will give DS pocket money, I already give him chore money if he's especially helpful (loading washing machine, watering plants) but it will be nominal amounts.
DS has had a building society account since he was born and I purposely went for one with a book as that was how I understood what I had (or didn't have) when I was little. Personally I think it's easier for kids to understand if they can see it.

I started quite a bit younger than your dcs. I got so fed up of my dd asking for everything when we went anywhere. Now if she asks i just reply do you have money for that. Its saved me a lot of money.

I'm interested in this as when we go and visit my parents next week they have prepared a little purse with some coins in it for my son who has just turned four to spend. I think it is bonkers! He will probably flush it down the toilet or drop it down a drain.

Hmmm, our elder DC's are 8 and almost 10 and don't yet get regular pocket money. However they do seem to always be getting things paid for and even when they do have money I always end up saying 'oh no, just you keep it and I will get this'. I had not really thought about this until I read this thread.

In the past 10 days they have been given £15 each (grandparents and family friends) and have so far bought:

DS - 1 dvd (£3), 1 book (£3) and football cards (£1)
DD - 1 dvd (£5), 1 drawing pad (£3.50) and moshi cards (£1.50)

Yet DS still has £12 and DD still has £10...

Thats not including the new pencils, pads, sharpener and pond dipping kit that landed in the trolly @ sainsburys. Perhaps pocket money would be the cheaper option

The worst thing is they are far from greedy and demanding children... DS tried to buy his baby sister a cardi in the next sale :)

Sorry I hit post too quickly!

What would MN'rs deem a reasonable amount of pocket money for 8 and 10yr olds?

We started when dd turned five, she is now 6 and a half. She gets the equivalent of £3 per week ( we live overseas so it goes pretty far). She doesn't usually spend it,so has a lot in savings, but has started getting into Lego so that may change!

I often tell her that I will split the cost with her if she wants something that she doesn't need ( new shoes or other non essiential clothing) and that works well for us. I also tell her how many weeks allowance something will cost eg. A magazine is one week, a book might be 2-3 weeks.

Overall she still doesn't have a very good grasp of how much her money is worth, but I think that is because we work in three currencies. But she is learning about budgeting so that is my primary concern.

We usually started about 4 or 5, once they started school.

I would expect by 11 for them to be going to the shops alone and using their own money they have saved to buy an item. Also think its important for them to have autonomy over how they spend it.

If my DCs want to waste it on something its their choice, they'll learn to be more careful next time. I think its worked as the eldest 2 (both 16) have got jobs just in shops but still and have saved and paid for their own holidays away this year.

Also I tend to think money they are gifted, so for birthdays etc should be spent on more substantial meaningful stuff rather than frittered away on sweets and magazines. I'd feel annoyed to give someone £20 worth of mags and mars bars.

I am just about to start this with my 5 and soon-to-be-4 year olds.

I am going to give them £2 each a week. £1 will go into their piggy banks as savings, £1 can be spent.

I calculated this carefully. A packet of Buttons costs 70p. A one-minute ride on one of those supermarket machines costs £1. CBeebies magazine is, what, £2?

I am hoping this will give them buy-in, for want of a better word, into the treat-selecting process. And teach them to save up for things, of course. But I am a big fan of encouraging independence and self-care skills as early as possible.

Dd1 is 6 and gets £1 per week, if she does some minor chores (tidy room, set table when asked). When she's mithering for tat at the supermarket she's told she can buy it with her pocket money and suddenly it looks much less desirable so I think it's helping her start to understand the value of money. I do still buy her little treats if I feel she's earned it though and sometimes just for the sake of it. Dd2 is 4 and doesn't get pocket money yet though.

Rather than just giving children money, they should earn it shouldn't they? When I start giving DS pocket money he will have to do a chore of some sort regularly. Learning the value of money is not difficult, you can teach dc about it without giving free money, I don't want him to grow thinking he is entitled to pocket money for the sake of it.

DD sometimes gets it, other times doesn't. She changed her passbook building society acount into one with a card when she turned 11. The temptation to splash the cash was too much recently, her card was declined because she didn't have sufficient funds to cover the purchase.
I imagine she'll be more careful in future.

Ds has had pocket money from the age of 6 - I think your mother is right.