To get annoyed by Mummy Businesses

[NeilFan]

You know the type cake making, knitting, cup cakes, carding etc. Generally SAHMs whos kids are now at school and feel the need to go back into work but can't really be bothered. They pick up some hobby that people have diplomaticaly said they are good at and think it can be a business. Only know one person who actualy has a talent for their business choice, all of the others would be better just asking for cash directly rather than palming off sub standard products onto polite friends. Same goes for all of that pampered chef and candle who are even more deluded. My first post on mumsnet but this stuff really annoys me!

ooh that annoys me too Mrs, but mainly because the only people making money are those at the top.

They make out like you can run your own business and make big money but Avon is the ultimate in pyramid selling, you only make money if you recruit other people and if they recruit themselves

In many ways it is pejorative, but it is also used in a faux self depracating way too. It can be seen as something of a badge of honour. "oh yes, I am a yummy mummy....not really!" when they mean "YES really!" because of the cars they drive, the clothes they wear etc, and having a cottage industry is the latest "must have" in those circles. "I know that DH is a doctor and we dont need the money, but I feel I must contribute so I thought I would sell my cupcakes/bunting/earrings that everyone hates raves about"

Its fashionable to be a yummy in some places and fashionable to be anti yummy in others, and the mummy businesses do seem to spring up mainly in yummy places.

Yanbu. It is annoying and quite sad. It's not just mums though... I've known loadsa annoying people try and palm their crap off on me thinking they will soon be a millionaire!

well it is not as sad as sitting about doing nothing pontificating about the redistribution of wealth I suppose...

I used to quite like being the weird one what stitches stuff. Now I find I'm in danger of being a YM. Saints preserve us. Or is that somebody's jam making enterprise?

Really, although I too am heartily sick of gingham bunting, at least they're having a go. If someone is taking the piss then vote with your Cath Kidston purse and wall away.

Walk away. Walk.

So you are cross because
. Some people are married to rich men
. Some people try to make some money out of their hobby
. Some people 'make' you buy things.

I see

One of my best friends started a business from home doing manicures etc. I supported her at the start but I did become resentful because:

1. Friend had more disposable income than I did.
2. Friend always made a better job of her own nails than she did mine.
3. My nails had never been in worse condition and I don't even like having them painted.

I found I was handing over money I didn't have to someone who didn't really need it for something I didn't want/need/like but it was very hard to stop because I didn't want to offend her. Fortunately she lost interest in the end and went onto something else.

'Mummy Business' might be a misnomer though because she didn't have kids.

bogeyface please tell about the bunting affair in 2010

You've started two threads on this subject, so confusingly people are replying to you on the other one too.

I've replied on the other thread - YABU.

You sound like you are protesting a bit much though... maybe you're secretly jealous and would love to have a rich husband so you could bake cupcakes all day?! Go on, admit you have a pot of sparkly glittery stuff and a mammoth tube of that buttercream stuff in your baking cupboard!

A lot of what's annoying about these shitty fake businesses that are propped up by Hubby's money (or a trust fund) is the implication that if you were only as 'clever and creative and hardworking' as the silly bitches that run them then you, too, could be a wonderful Mumtrepreneur.

Ummm just like Carol Middleton, pratling round her kictchen fiddling with party bags! I am sure some of her friends thought the same thing as you op!

I know exactly the type you're referring to OP, and YANBU.

When it really boils my piss is when these wealthy-husband-subsidised hobbyists forever bleating about their "business" (without ever having put together a business plan, or done cash flow projections, or calculated time factoring, or carried out any market research...you get the picture) end up undercutting people who genuinely are trying to make a living from an actual skill, and who end up appearing overpriced in comparison because their prices do reflect their costs and time, so creating false market expectations.

If you have a hobby which you enjoy, the results of which you like to press on friends and family - that's great, more power to you. But please be honest with yourself and accept it's a hobby; don't try to make on like you're the next Cath Kidston / Anita Roddick when you haven't even worked out your costs, let alone tried to cover them.

I understand the impulse that leads women to start "mummy businesses". It's hard being trapped at home with only a few hours a day without children.

However, most of them are deluding themselves if they think they will make more than pin money from them. Possibly less than that if they take into account the true cost of eg extra electricity/gas for cooking, time spent shopping etc.

I think most of them should look at their work skills, and see if there is a market for using those on a freelance basis - it will keep them up to date and look better on a future CV than a cup cake business (although that is better than nothing).

I agree re the undercutting but I see no problem with earning 'pin money'. Are we really so judgey that we can't allow someone who had the temerity to marry someone with a good job the opportunity to run a small business. I hear what you are saying about feeling pressurised to spend unavailable cash but that can't apply to all small businesses. Why is it better if you make more money? This is capitalism not socialism.

Mummy Businesses. Good term. Annoyance goes away simply by making the distinction between a "mummy business" and a proper "small business".

Mixed feelings here: to write off all businesses started by housewives as "mummy businesses" isn't nice, but I do agree with the "mummy menacing". I was stupidly quite excited to be invited to coffee by a school-gate mum I had chatted with a few times. After I had accepted her 11am, next Tuesday invitation she called after me, "Oh, it's Phoenix Cards, so bring your purse!"

blurry hell that would pee me off letty

No one's writing off all businesses started by housewives. If a housewife starts a business e-commerce business selling cards that's a proper small business, if it's roping acquaintances or the local village into buying Phoenix Cards, that's a mummy business.

Hope you don't have a last minute dental appointment next Tuesday morning, it would be such a shame. :)

It's worse when the DH's fund them to set up "proper" businesses. This probably happens later, when there really is no reason for them to be SAHM anymore.

They've been out of the workplace for so long they think they have no marketable skills so DH funds them to set up something they've been good customers of. Hairdressers, beauty parlour, high end clothes shop... They then use DH's reputation in the business community to get credit for their business and are bust within the year, when DH (who does have business sense and has a limit to how long he will humour her for) stops funding, leaving a trail debt.

You might think it doesn't happen a lot, but in my real (before mummy) job I had to pick up the pieces and it does. Very few of these businesses become a success because actually running your own business is incredibly hard work. Some people make it look easy and maybe once it's well established it is easier, but the only people who make a real success of it are those prepared to put in far more hours than a "proper" job requires, at least at the start.

It's not that there's anything wrong with wanting to do something that brings in a few extra quid. Even some of the franchise/party plan things can work quite nicely if you are the only rep in the area and the products are good. I did Avon for several years and though it really was only pocketmoney, it was OK; I had an old people's home on my patch and did a lot of business there as many of the residents were pretty much housebound and really liked having the catalogues and samples, and being able to order Xmas presents etc. I also do shows and fairs with a range of badges/fridge magnets/keyrings that I make myself.

But, as others said, it's the comfortable smug cluelessness of most of these arty/poncey/handicrafty business types that grates. The products are either expensive and unnecessary even if they are pretty (handmade baby socks, twiggy gingham hearts) or they're actually fairly rubbish (home-made cards that look like they were done by a 6 year old. Those are only endearing when they are made by a 6-year-old family member of the recipient) so they only make money by pressuring their friends to buy their crap.

I understand you OP. Ihate those parties, making money out of your friends, horrible, just horrible. Then there are the 'yummy Mummies' who host charity events but really only do them to boost their social life. If you want to do a charitable thing, go and work in Oxfam, be a parent governor at your local state school or do The 3 peaks.

LOL grammar, but don't ask me to sponsor you for those 3 peaks!

I did the 3 peaks, bloody hell, it was the hardest thing I've ever done and that includes childbith x3. Maybe I'll host a 'charitable event' next time.....

I know grammar, it was slightly tongue in cheek, but it does wind me up to constantly asked to sponsor friends, colleagues and their children to go on excursions of their choosing. Not really that different to funding their hobbies by way of pseudo businesses.