to be pissed off with this? (school related)

[hatesponge]

DS2 is in Year 6. It was his leavers show tonight.

Before the show started, there was a powerpoint projected onto the stage. Each child had a pic of themselves on their slide, with something about their character in the show (if they had a named part), who was their hero and why, and their hopes for the future. All rather lovely.

Except for the fact at least 10-15 children weren't on there. I saw some of the same children twice, so I am certain the others were missed out. There was also time for them all to have been shown.

The show itself was the usual sort of thing you'd expect. DS2 and some of his friends were told they couldn't be in the show and had to do props. So when all the rest of the year were singing, dancing & acting, DS2 & the other props boys (about 5 of them) had to sit round the back, waiting to come on during the blackout and move stuff around...

At the end, there was no round of applause for them - the 'cast' finished their song & that was it. Now its been years since I did plays at school, but I remember that there would be applause for the cast, crew, choir, drama teacher etc etc. I didn't get to see my boy or applaud him - same for the parents of the other props boys - until he came out afterwards.

Final straw was the fact that I missed a good part of the show, and the headteachers speech after, due to the constant chatter and calling out of a child in the audience whose parents were too lazy or stupid to take him outside

In the grand scheme of things of course its not the end of the world, but it just seems such a crappy end to DS2s education after more than 7 years at the school...

Sounds rubbish. Your poor ds I'm not Suprised you were pissed off. Mind you I will be a blubbering wreck when my turn comes so maybe saved you from that.

This is true - at DS1's I had a little cry , but tonight I was too annoyed to feel upset!

Are you in Kent?

I know that some hate being on stage and want to do props etc- however they should get applause and be seen at the end. Noisy DCs in the audience should be banned.

numbum I am! Oh no, have I outed myself? Surely there can't be 2 in Kent with a similarly chaotic leavers show...

You are not being unreasonable AT ALL!! How dare they sideline some children and effectively tell them they are not good enough and can deal with props in the dark. At our school the events are dominated by one particular child who always seems to get the best parts, centre stage, writes articles in the newsletter etc when there are plenty of equally better talented kids who could have been chosen to perform. If they haven't broken up yet you must write a letter to the head. Although it wont make a difference to you it may prevent other children being sidelined in the future. I wrote to the head over an event that specifically excluded younger siblings so they didn't disrupt performances. I can and have removed my child if they act up so the performance can continue in peace. Good luck with whatever course of action you decide but this is too important to confine it just to mumsnet. I'm sure other parents at your school feel the same way. Just remember to praise your child and tell them what a great job they did and how proud you are of them.

Oh no! I would be gutted by this, and more than a little unreasonable I expect.

I'm big on these school things - always get over emotional, especially leavers ones.

How is your ds? Is he dissapointed or did he enjoy it?

The photo thing might be because the parents have said they don't want their DCs photographed.

It does sound generally pretty bad though.

At dd1's leavers show the last song was positioned by the bigger a part you had the further back you were. The backstage crew (highly contested too I believe) were right at the front. I thought that was a really nice touch. After the last song, each group then had a bow before leaving, so the backstage crew got the first round of applause.

I wonder whether on the photo thing it was done randomly. We set our computer screensaver to show our photos in random order. It surprises me that of our 2000+ photos we have stored, often we will get one (not the same one) that comes up two or three times in fairly quick succession. So they might have been there just happened that they didn't come up.

Tbf, my y6 son insisted on being props in his leavers play and had to be coerced into standing on stage for one song. The photo thing was probably on random, but it could have been child protection, and/or a few away when the camera was out.

Agree that the children not on the overhead wotsit would be the children whose parents haven't signed the photographic permission form for whatever reason.

Also agree that some children would rather stick pins in their eyes than appear on stage and so are happier doing props etc. They should have been applauded, though.

And the chattering child - I had one of these last year and was ready to rugby tackle the parents to the ground and scream "have some consideration you MUPPETS!" in their faces. If your child can't keep quiet and you have no babysitter - watch from behind a door. Don't let them spoil it for everyone else because your sense of entitlement has become overblown.

YANBU and I'm sorry what should have been a lovely experience was spoiled for you.

Don't think photo permission would apply here, schools are allowed to take photos of any children for use within the school, and the powerpoint was just that (unless it was given away on CDs afterwards?). If parents wanted to take photos of the performance, they should have been asked to sign something saying they would not share them publicly afterwards, but every child could have been included in the powerpoint and it is just shoddy that they weren't.

Some children hate being on stage and love doing props - in my current year 5 cohort we were fighting to find enough actors for this year's christmas production as so many wanted to do props and backstage instead, but unless there have been serious behaviour issues (which you should already be aware of), I am very that children were told they had to be backstage and couldn't be in the show. And damn right, the backstage crew should be thanked and get a round of applause.

Sounds like the person/people in charge of this should be spoken to about fairness, and I think you should inform the head, by email if possible which is more immediate than a letter, so that he/she can talk to them.