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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that these women need to get lives?

68 replies

BupcakesandCunting · 17/07/2012 13:45

I work p/t in a clothes shop. You would not believe the amount of women that come in and ask for a refund on clothes they have bought because their husband/boyfriend did not like it. I rarely am able to disguise my contempt for these women and usually make a sarky remark like "Oh, I'd assumed you'd bought it for you! Not your husband!"

AIBU?

OP posts:
redrubyshoes · 17/07/2012 14:04

I could walk around in a big furry rabbit suit with a carrot up my arse and DP wouldn't notice.

Kayano · 17/07/2012 14:04

I tell DH when he looks a bloody fool (sleeveless tshirts really? You are 20 stone!)

And he tells me when he doesn't like something 'you look like an 80s throwback, you are too old for neon leg warmers etc'

We have a fantastic relationship.

I can then consider 'take it back? Hmmm he has a point? Or fuck him I look old Skool cool... Where is my perm'

But judge away. Hope you judgy pants fookin knack and look awful

WinkAngry

Tiptoptoe · 17/07/2012 14:04

I agree, you sound really mean. What on earth has it got to do with you? You did not pay for it - in fact, you are paid to refund if that is what they prefer. To sit and judge? What a gem.

If you said that to me, no matter how you said it - I would give you a mouthful about minding your own.

Birdsgottafly · 17/07/2012 14:05

Why are you subservient if you have respect for each other's opinion, to the extent that you would act on it?

How can you come to that conclusion if you don't know that it works both ways?

When we shop together, usually we are right when trying stuff on what we thought wouldn't work as well.

We are usually amongst the best dressed when we go anywhere, though.

ScarletLadyOfTheNight01 · 17/07/2012 14:06

Some people do feel a bit nervous about taking things back so they might prefer to make up bollox than just be forthright and say "I don't like it any more", in case the sales-person doesn't see it as a good enough reason (which it is) and they're worried about it being awkward...or something...

But then I'm a worrier who over-thinks things.

SoleSource · 17/07/2012 14:06

Have you considered the fact the clothing could be for their Husband's? Some like to wear Ladies clothing.

YABU Grin

Original poster
BupcakesandCunting · 17/07/2012 14:07

You are never too old for neon legwarmers.

And I would have you escorted from the shop for behaving like a fishwife, Tiptop.

OP posts:
Original poster
BupcakesandCunting · 17/07/2012 14:08

"We are usually amongst the best dressed when we go anywhere, though"

Birdsgotta fly and her DH are the Beckhams and I claim my five pounds.

OP posts:
Kayano · 17/07/2012 14:09

I agree there.

I have just bought purple hairdye today because I want to. In the same trip I returned a jumper that DH said made me look like an uumpa luumpa, he was right. Wink

Original poster
BupcakesandCunting · 17/07/2012 14:12

Well, that's different Kayano! You agree that he was right so that's fair enough. Like when DH said that my new hair made me look like Myra Hindley he was right so I grew it out. Blush

But most women are looking mournfully at the thing they've just returned because THEY like it. I just don't get it.

OP posts:
ScarletLadyOfTheNight01 · 17/07/2012 14:15

I agree it's a bit of a shame if someone really likes something but feels they can't wear it because a partner says so. It's a different thing if someone points out that you like like a trainspotter in that coat and you then realise that you do.

DeepPurple · 17/07/2012 14:16

"BupcakesandCunting Tue 17-Jul-12 14:03:09
Oh and the "you haven't got a life for starting a thread about something" line is really thick. Most of MN is chit-chat about trivial shit."

I didn't say you didn't have a life so why the quote marks? Hmm

YABVU for saying that every woman that returns something saying that her husband doesn't like it should get a life. Why haven't they got a life?

I once returned a dress as my DH didn't like it. He said it made me look washed out. He was right.

I have a life though Hmm

Original poster
BupcakesandCunting · 17/07/2012 14:16

Precisely, Scarlet.

OP posts:
Original poster
BupcakesandCunting · 17/07/2012 14:17

"
As for them getting lives? They aren't the ones starting threads about it..."

It's the same thing, isn't it?

And see my point above. You agreed with your husband so that's different. Obvious why you're being so touchy though.

OP posts:
ScarletLadyOfTheNight01 · 17/07/2012 14:23

I know it sounds ridiculously pretentious, but my style is quite extreme and is very important to me, so if my DH made the point of telling me he didn't like something I wore then I'd take that as...well a kind of personal affront to my creativity or something (God that does sound pretentious).

However, my DH knew my style and it's importance when we got together, and it's such a part of me that if he didn't like it then I doubt he'd have stayed with me Grin

StuntGirl · 17/07/2012 14:24

Yanbu; if my boyfriend didn't like something I'd never take it back. I'm the one wearing it, not him!

He wears some shocking combinations sometimes I don't criticise his taste because it's what he likes.

AThingInYourLife · 17/07/2012 14:29

I love this thread for the insight it has given me to Kayano's marriage. :o

AThingInYourLife · 17/07/2012 14:32

I bet at least some of the women are saying their husband doesn't like it, but the reality is that it's the S&B peanut gallery.

And it is very important to listen to your Style and Beauty betters :)

Birdsgottafly · 17/07/2012 14:34

"Birdsgotta fly and her DH are the Beckhams and I claim my five pounds."

No, but we look good.

And we try to match our colours, think Blue flowers on my dress to go with his shirt, we never contrast Blush.

ScarletLadyOfTheNight01 · 17/07/2012 14:36

Hehee, me and DH look so different. When we go out we're like the odd couple. He looks pretty straight (he takes care of his appearance and is smart), and then there's me with my crazy dreads, and pretty much entirely black and grey (but incredibly stylish) slouchiness.

Feminine · 17/07/2012 14:37

I think they are lying.

Its just a popular one.

I don't think most men care what we wear actually.

They probably wear it for a few hours and go off it!

Kayano · 17/07/2012 14:38

ATHing

It's a good one full of laughs
When we got married the priest found out that we met in McDonald's and made his speech about 'super sizing your love'

And changed a reading from building a house on good foundations to building a sturdy big mac.

GrinWink

SoleSource · 17/07/2012 14:38

:) Birds

TheBigJessie · 17/07/2012 14:39

I think I'm thinking along the same lines as AThingInYourLife, actually.

I mean, which is less embarrassing (and less socially risky) to say to a complete stranger at the till?

  1. "I'm taking it back because my husband doesn't think it suits me"

or

  1. "I'm taking it back 'cos some women on the internet (that I don't even know) said it was a total no-no, and I feel too embarrassed to wear it now."
Kayano · 17/07/2012 14:40

And op sometimes I look mournfully at an outfit I am returning in a 'I wish it hadn't looked so fooking horrid on me'

Or

'if only I had 2 more inches of leg'

You can never know why people return things so just let it go over your head