Medicine every day?

[JaffaO]

Hi All

I am going anon for this, as I know the person in question uses parenting boards, and so I don't want her to recognise me.

DH brother and his partner, have a baby boy, who is approx 11 months old. We were told at the weekend by MIL that baby's mammy gives him 2 x 5ml calpol every single day, and has done for the past number of months - I would hazard 4-6 months at least.

DH brother seems to know this is wrong, hence why he spoke to his mother about it. He claims he has asked her to stop giving it several times, but each time she brushed it off. He spoke again with her at the weekend, and told her once and for all to stop, and she agreed. However I have my doubts as to whether she actually will. To me she is medicating him, so that she can avoid a screaming child, on the off chance that he teethes or something.

The baby is a very good baby, has his moments like they all do, but is very good humoured and sleeps brilliantly - always has, so there really is no need for that.

I am concerned and angry about this, for two reasons. Firstly, I don't know what damage, if any, prolonged and daily use of Calpol could have. Secondly, I don't think she is to be trusted to stop. I think she has it in her head that she needs to give this to him, just in case any pain starts. She is a difficult character to say the least, and it could be a case that she can only cope with him when he is placid, and can't even bare thoughts of a cranky child.

But then again, I could be over-reacting and should tae her at her word that she has stopped, and don't give it a second thought.

I would be interested to hear every elses opionion......

YANBU - using Calpol so regularly risks causing liver damage in the baby.

Quite aside from the issue that it may mask other conditions, or the possibility that the baby may build up a tolerance to paracetmol (and therefore need more Calpol when actually in pain).

Does she understand how dangerous over-medicating her baby can be?

I would be worried not just about the calpol but with MH issues (and I have them myself so not a judgy pants hike up) she will have acccess to other medication.

Once the baby builds up a resistance is she going to give valium or something else?

I also think that she needs help, maybe she is scared she will hurt the baby if he cries and this is the better option. And in that case it may well be.

Can you talk to her?

Can you offer to take baby for a few hours?

Can you support her to access services?

There are cases where you have to weigh the risk of the medication against the situation of the actual child. Dd has been in a situation where she has been ordered to take paracetamol every day for an indefinite period. She has not sustained liver damage. She is now on tramadol, which is stronger, and may well have to stay on that indefinitely- or at least until something better is invented.

But this is in a situation where damage by severe chronic pain is judged a greater risk than the (small) risk of taking the painkillers; besides, the situation is monitored by her doctor.

Why would you take even a small risk in a case where is no greater risk to outweigh it?

What we were told is that you don't build up a physical resistance to paracetamol in the sense that it stops being effective- rather it becomes more effective if you take it regularly (which is why dd has been told she has to take her painkillers regularly to get maximum effect).

However, in the present case, there seems to be a real danger that the mother becomes psychologically addicted to giving her baby medicine and feels the need to up the dose or try stronger stuff. Dh had a colleague once who had developed a (doubtless psychological) addiction to aspirins: he was eating them like sweets and getting more and more stressed and ill.

I don't like the sound of this at all...

Her MH issues sound quite worrying in the sense that she may be likely to over-medicate her child throughout his life, with potential long-term effects. In a totally non-professional way, I doubt that this amount of Calpol is harming the child any more than, say, gripe water - which was alcoholic, and widely used several times a day with grumpy babies - or the nip of brandy that was given to babies when I was little!

But the long-term potential is worrying in this particular case. I suppose her partner ought to speak to their HV and GP about it.

I am quite surprised that nobody has suggested calling SS. This mother is not coping and the baby is at risk.