Sorry long!!
Hi all bit of back ground I have been with my husband for over 10 years and have 2 small children, a ds whos 5 and a dd whos 3. My husbands parents had him very late in life after being told they couldnt have children. They have doted on him all his life.
I have had issues with my mil in the past she has been quite cruel and manipulative and has said some spiteful, twisted things to me. She made it clear she wasnt happy about us having children although she now clearly loves my children ds in particular as he is the image of his dad. Throughout the years we have tolerated each other and I have tried very hard to get along with her for my husbands sake.
Things recently changed when we announced we were finally getting married, she clearly wasnt happy about this but very generously gave us 2 grand towards it which we didnt expect and were very grateful for.
As the wedding date approached she became very on edge and wound up over it after a petty argument between me and ds over something silly she took him to one side and said she didnt think we should get married as her and here husband have NEVER argued in their 55 years of marriage (this I know not to be true!!)
Anyway fast forward to the day and she turned up late, I had to wait in the car for her outside the church, wearing no make up, her hair scraggly and in a 15 year old faded black funeral dress.
She didnt talk to me all day, was reluctant to be in the photos, gave me evil looks through out the speech (other people there informed me of this) Left very early ( before 5) without the bouquet of flowers we presented to her as a thank you and didnt even say goodbye.
This upset my husband who later confronted her about her behaviour she had many excuses for it ( he fell for a lot of them) but as far as I was concerned the matter was resolved.
I later sent out some thank you cards to the guests and I genuinally couldnt think of anything apart from the money to thank them for on the day, I wrote in the end,
Thank you so much for your very generous gift, it went a long way to making our day so special, it was lovely to see you there, thanks for making the effort to attend.
She later rung my husband is tears telling him the note was horrible and he had a go at me before reading it himself- I later made him ring his mum and get her to read out the letter which she did and he thought it was absolutely fine and said he wouldnt have been able to add anything else himself. She then backtracked and said she didnt have a problem with the note!!!
I am sick of her constantly trying and succeeding in causing trouble between us and I am at a loss on what to do- Any advice would be more than welcome.