To think that if the bag says:

[SaggyOldClothCatPuss]

Self levelling compound, add 4 litres of water, mix thoroughly and apply resultant slurry to the floor...
That it should fucking LEVEL ITSELF! And not be the consistency of fucking play doh? And if the bag says covers up to 5m square, then I shouldn't need a whole fucking bag for one tiny patch that is only about a metre square??
I fucking HATE DIY!

Ggaaarrrggghhhgg!

Sounds like it needs more water. But YANBU to hate DIY. :)

4ltrs isn't a lot of water, should it say 14 by any chance?

No. It says FOUR LITRES! A ratio of 5 to 1. Fucking stuff! I threw it in the hole, added more water and swilled it about with the trowel! It's fucking well everywhere, I've even got it in my split ends!
Not one I the fuckers in my house help, I've just got the dog for company, and he just sits there looking fucking smug!

what make is it?

I don't know, B&Q is where I got it from. I'm on the way out for chocolate now! I've shut the door on it!!

You needed more water regardless of packet instructions (aim for a syrupy texture) and self levelling compound rarely levels itself completely, it needs to be guided with a trowel.

I know it dries quickly, but can you get it up before it dries completely, otherwise you will be chiselling or grinding it out.

oh fuckity fuck fuck! This is why DIY should be avoided.

But then someone has to do it. When I go home I wander around and all the little DIY projects/things that need fixing bug me. But if I go there I know it's going to mess up - my skills lie in other areas, unfortunately so do DP's.

Arrrgh!!!!!

HipHop - the first rule of DIY is knowing your own limitations

Indeed :)

I haven't lifted it, I've smoothed it out and left it. I figured if it's too dry it got a head start on itself! It's flat enough for what I need!