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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think "let yourself into the garden" does not mean "feel free to wander into my house"

29 replies

FutureNannyOgg · 16/07/2012 13:25

A bit odd really. This really got me on the back foot today and I am not sure if this is normal or not.

I was expecting a window company to come and replace an outside pane on our french windows. When they came to do the quote I nearly missed them because I was in the shower, so today I decided to avoid missing him while bathing DS by leaving a note on the door, along the lines of "if I don't answer, I'm sorting the baby out, let yourself in the side gate and I will be with you asap". I unlocked the french window because I knew he might need to open it to fit the pane.

Typically the doorbell rang when I was up to my elbows in soapy toddler, but secure in my note leaving, I finished washing him, then bundled him into a big towel to go down and talk to the window guy. When I got downstairs I bumped into the window chap (who wasn't the one who did the quote, I'd never met him before) in my dining room, he had a complements slip type thing in his hand which I assume was a note telling me what he then told me, that it was too wet for him to set up his kit and he would have to leave it until later.

AIBU to think that it's not normal to wander into someone's house uninvited, and that a door being unlocked so you can do a job is not an invitation. I am sure he could have posted his note through the letterbox, in fact I am not sure where he was thinking of leaving it.

I'm not feeling particularly suspicious about it or anything, it just seems a bit of an odd way to go about things. Oh and he left the bloody gate unlatched so it is slamming in the wind, and it is chucking it down out there, and if DS sees me sneaking out in the rain to shut it he will want to go out and play in puddles, I am far too pregnant to want to deal with that right now. (I think I might BU for that bit)

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savoycabbage · 16/07/2012 13:28

Confused but you said 'let yourself in the side gate' and then you left the door open. I would have let myself in thinking that you wanted me to come and find you as you didn't want me to wake the aforementioned baby!

HecateHarshPants · 16/07/2012 13:29

Perhaps he interpreted you giving him information on how to get into the garden as you actually saying wait in the house? "let yourself in by the side gate. He may not have understood that you meant let yourself into the back garden and not let yourself into the house by going through the back gate. iyswim.

FutureNannyOgg · 16/07/2012 13:31

Maybe, but then I could have just left the front door open rather than leaving a note on the front door with treasure hunt instructions.

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FutureNannyOgg · 16/07/2012 13:32

Either way, I am quite glad I wasn't the one dressed in only a towel.
(that was DS btw, not the window man, that would have been odd.)

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ShatnersBassoon · 16/07/2012 13:32

Just a misunderstanding. I don't think his intention was to trespass.

NoGoodNamesLeft · 16/07/2012 13:33

I would assume that 'let yourself in' means 'let yourself into the house'.

Vicbic · 16/07/2012 13:34

I would have done exactly the same as he did. Your note wasn't very clear. Did you expect him to just wait in your back garden until you reappeared? If you had been putting the baby to sleep you could have been half an hour!

Nancy66 · 16/07/2012 13:36

...would the alternative be him waiting outside in the rain?

FutureNannyOgg · 16/07/2012 13:36

Fair enough, I need to find a way to say "just go and get on with the job" politely then. It's a rented house, so he is working for the landlord, he didn't need any instructions from me or anything, I just expected him to go into the garden and do the window IYSWIM.

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Teeb · 16/07/2012 13:37

I think I would have done the same as him too.

CwtchesAndCuddles · 16/07/2012 13:37

You're at fault for not being cear that you didn't mean for him to come in. I would have done the same as him!

FutureNannyOgg · 16/07/2012 13:38

I didn't expect him to wait at all, I thought he would turn up, tell me he was here, do the window, and go again. Like I said, I'm not the one who commissioned the work.

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NoraHelmer · 16/07/2012 13:40

When we had workmen wandering in and out doing building works I used to leave the doors unlocked/open and they were free to come in and make themselves cups of tea, help themselves to biscuits etc.

LentillyFart · 16/07/2012 13:40

How filthy was the baby that you couldn't just bath him after the chap had been?

bejeezus · 16/07/2012 13:43

why would he think you wanted him to 'let himself in' to the garden though?

may as well wait by the front door?

'let yourself in' means into the house

FutureNannyOgg · 16/07/2012 13:44

Nora, I would do the same, but this isn't workmen doing building works, it's one window, I expect that you met your builders first and showed them where things were, I'd do the same.
Lentilly, he was bad nappy dirty and I didn't know what time he was going to turn up, just sometime today, that might have been at 4pm.

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sashh · 16/07/2012 13:46

Either way, I am quite glad I wasn't the one dressed in only a towel.

I was once in a hotel, as I was getting out of the bath the door opened, a hotel receptionist started showing the room to another guest - I'm glad the hotel had decent sized towels, not the little one you often get.

I know totally off topic - sorry

lambethlil · 16/07/2012 13:47

I would understand the not to mean 'come in'. And the fact that the French Doors were open would suggest so too. Don't worry, just be more explicit next time!

FutureNannyOgg · 16/07/2012 13:48

bejeezus, because the garden is where the window is! I wasn't offering him a game of football or anything. I thought it would be the same guy as before (small local company) so he knew the job and I wouldn't be holding him up by him having to wait by the front door.

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FutureNannyOgg · 16/07/2012 13:49

oh dear sashh...

The door wasn't open open, it was just unlocked.

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FutureNannyOgg · 16/07/2012 13:52

Does this work:
Dear window chap, If I don't answer the door straightaway, the window is out the back, if you want to start work access is via the back gate, I will be with you soon.
Please don't come looking for me, I may not be dressed, and no one needs to see that.
FNO

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minibmw2010 · 16/07/2012 13:58

But he couldn't do the work as its too wet so he stepped inside to leave you a note. Did you want him to leave without you knowing? Or did it not occur to you that it's wet outside and keeping anyone outside in the rain is rude ???

FutureNannyOgg · 16/07/2012 14:01

But where was he going to leave the note mini? The usual is through the letterbox. Maybe he was going to walk through the house from the back to drop it on the mat? I expected him to either do the work (which he told me he could have if it had been a beaded window, but this one needs the door off) or leave a note through the letterbox and go off and do his thing. I never said I expected him to stand in the rain and wait for me, the whole point of leaving a note for him was so he wouldn't have to wait for me.

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Nancy66 · 16/07/2012 14:06

if you knew he was coming why couldn't you have made sure you were up and dressed?

FutureNannyOgg · 16/07/2012 14:11

Nancy, I said upthread that I didn't know when he would turn up. I also was up and dressed, I was bathing DS who had a nappy explosion.

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