To ask why

[Pickles77]

Why people have children and then say how much hard work/torture it is?
I'm pregnant and this is terrifying me. Now I'm not scared Of hard work but the horror stories about sleep deprivation, tantrums, interfering people and many others is seriously terrifying me and got me wondering what I'm doing!

HELP

Good luck pickles :)

Am sure you'll soon find that if you were offered millions of pounds & your old life back in exchange for your child you wouldn't even hesitate to turn it down. I know I wouldn't even when he's driving me nuts!

Agree there is lots of cometitive awfulness.

OP the first few weeks meant disrupted sleep, and I had to nap during the day a little to get my 8 hours over 24 hours which I need, but you might be lucky, as I was, and have a baby that needs a lot of sleep. You will adapt as far as your baby allows you to.

A friend once told me kids are Gods way of testing if you're a murderer.

No in all seriousness noone knows what it's like before you have children, some people like me have one and say never again, others love it and have lots.

It is hard work at times and it can be mentally draining. But it is also never as bad as people say because once the baby is here for most people it is like they were never 'not there'. You do things for your own children that you probably woudn't do for anyone else and have an unconditional love for them. You go through difficult stages and easy stages. For me at it's worst I'm cleaning up vomit and runny poo after a night of no sleep, at it's best ds does or says something that to me is absolutely amazing or hilarious and it just makes it all worth it.

As for the sleepless night for me personally and as someone that needs a lot of sleep, those early months wern't too bad, you just kind of do it on autopilot and eventually they do just sleep and you're back to getting your 8 hours or more.

I'm the least maternal, least patient person and it's absolutely fine.

Oh and on interfering people it does happen and at times peoples opinions and unwanted advice or comments will make your blood boil but 9 times out of 10 when you have children people are very kind, helpful, generous it's like a secret entitled to club.

And if all else fails there's always CBeebies and mumsnet

Because everyone wanks on about having the birth you want but doesn't actually prepare you for the grind of the first few months

It is a massive shock
It is knackering
You are often unsure about all things
Very often you lose all sense of self and proportion
You could be demented by all or any of these things but adding lack of sleep into the mix can seem like a shitestorm

Then usually it smoothes out and you forget and it's lovely and a breeze
So you have another

Repeat

Sorry to keep gong on but another thing I find is some parents just love to play the martyr about how difficult and awful their life is post children, how they don't even get times to have a shit or eat. I knoew one and I bought her a book and her response was 'when the hell am I going to find time to read this' they are usually the ones who go on to have lots of childen

It's not that bad, as a mum of one I still find lots of time to have some me times even if it's just a couple of hours in the evening.