To be completely angry, frustrated and sad about stupid x letting kids down, and ask you how to handle it?

[bejeezus]

We've been apart approx 3 months. He has been more interested in the kids than I thought he would be, although this only equals seeing them for a couple of hours at w/e and school drop off twice a week

He had not turned up once before. Yesterday he wad supposed to be here at 7am as dc1 had to ne somewhere and I didn't want to wake dc2. He didn't turn up so I took dc2 with me.

Then he was supposed to be here at 1pmt because we all had to go to a function together. I collected dc1 from her event early to facilitate this and then he arrived at 4pm!

Yesterday we arranged that he would have kids today from 9am until 4pm. He hasn't arrived and is not answering phone

Kids don't seem bothered but im sure its giving them awful messages about themselves. Dd1 defends het dad and makes excuses for him

Besides which I really needed to go back to bed, do some cleaning/sorting/shopping.

I'm SOOOOOO ANGRY with him

don't call him to the children - they'll resent it. tell them how disappointed you are and move on. always have plan b in case he lets you down. wait. they'll see him for what he is eventually.

I dont call him to the children

Do what you need to do - he was due at 9am - he didn't show - get on with things - go out if you need to

it's horrible for the kids but we have to do the cheery face thing and carry on!

Today, I think, I'm mostly feeling sorry for me rather than the kids

I definitely need to get kids out of the house. But I have so much stuff I need to do in the house. And its work again tomorrow

Don't tell them he is going to see them. That way if he doesn't turn up they won't be let down.

And if he carries on messing you around get him to mediation and lay down a few ground rules. I tolerated some pissing around from my XP in the first few months then I'd had enough. In the end as he couldn't have it exactly how he wanted he didn't see them anymore, shows where his priorities were! It's hard but better than putting up with his nonsense.