Don't flame me as I know I'm ungrateful

[Mamamaiasaura]

But it's my birthday and my very very lovely friend has sent me the Grey books via Amazon gifts ... Currently working out how long I need to keep them, how I can pretend I read them or will I have to? I feel a bit like I've been set some homework o do over the summer that I really don't want to do. I'm not into porn at all and do not find things like nipple twiddling remotely erotic (looks down at 8m dd nursing). :)

So are they worth a read

I often get books as presents for friends but I wouldn't ask them about them just in case they didn't like them. If she asks just vaguelly say you haven't got round to reading them yet.
Fizzy apples, I believe it is the law to have the books now.

Happy birthday mama I know what you mean I'm not a big fan of having books 'chosen' for me either (although I do belong to a book group but that's a bit different somehow) and the Grey books don't appeal to me either. I'd probably just pop them on a shelf and ignore them.

If it's not your sort of thing, just sell them on Amazon and get something else.
Surely your friend's intention was to get you something you would enjoy?

I read them in this first year of my DDs life, perhaps when I was out of the muzzy, tired, attention span of a flea, more than 5 spare mins a time stage I would do a more critical analysis of the books but considering all of the above they were perfect

I'd rather not know if I was the 'giver' to be honest. It's not remotely ungrateful to not even try them if you know they're not for you. If someone gave me a horror book I woudn't even start it, why should mama if it's not her thing?!

Haha, lock me up, it's a fair cop!

Do as you would with any other unwanted gift, be polite, say thank you and then bin it send it to a charity shop.

Why say or do anything? I've had books as presents before that I've not liked or been inclined to read. I wouln't dream of selling them on or getting a refund. They are just added to the general milieu. These bloody books do not have sacred powers and must be read or destroyed. Just say a gracious thank you and ignore them.

You don't sound at all ungrateful by the way.

Where have I said I'd sell them or get a refund? confused]

I've just been given the first one and haven't brought myself to read it yet. Wouldn't have bougt it myself but as I haven't had to, I am a little curious so will prob give it a go!

I agree just shove them on a shelf and ignore them.

(by the way, re: nipple twiddling, I am also bf but find the twiddling extreeeeeemely erotic. It's not the same as bf! Entirely different feelings and emotions (obviously!) )

Mama - a few other posters have suggested an exchange or refund.

btw I would just ignore them then discreetly charity shop them.

You don't sound ungrateful, its just that their not your kind of thing.

Personally I have loved them and maybe found a new, unknown side of myself

Apparently, they are now all the rage as a drinking game.

Everytime her inner goddess stirs or trembles you take a shot

You'd be wasted by page 5

blackhole I've never liked my nipples tweaked or twiddled

betty

Bad Cat, usually I'd be with you on that advice, but everybody seems to want to bloody talk about these ones. A bit of research is needed because the subject will come up.

Although I've taken to injecting my personal (made up) opinion of this months wet'n'wild to get my point across

"inner goddess?" oh my. Ummm really? Pennies to busy thinking about cake

Pennies? My inner goddess is too busy thinking about cake

If you skip the porny bits and ignore the simpering idiot that is the female lead and the emotionally abusive dick that is the male lead then the secondary story is quite good. You also have to pretend you can't read very well so you don't notice how repetitive it is.

If someone were to buy me these books, it would be like buying a friend who is VERY into their music and likes very specific genres/artists and goes to festivals like ATP or reads Plan B something like...Peter Andre's new album. Or someone else churning out conveyor-belt, shallow, plastic music

You just wouldn't do it would you - buy your music-loving friend Peter Andre. So why is it OK to buy you badly written, flavour of the bloody month, tripe dressed up in a dust jacket?

It's not on. Don't be ashamed or feel ungrateful. Send them back to her with a note asking what you've ever done to her to deserve this, and how can you rectify this situation to salvage the friendship when it's obviously imploded in such a way that she feels the need to treat you this way.

Is it easy to skim read foxy?