Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6 ··· 9 10

Original poster

To think she should have rescued her own child instead of raging at me?

239 replies

drowningyouout · 14/07/2012 17:00

Name changed for this. Regular poster and don't want this attached to my normal user name.

Weather here crap, as everywhere, but warm enough so DS (7) and I don wellies and waterproofs and take a walk down the beach.

Wind and tide conditions are making it very rough and tide was mid height and on it's way in.

We see a mum, dad and their 2 DC's on some rocks - which as you imagine are wet and slippery.

Suddenly a wave crashes up to the rocks and one of their DC's (a lad of 6) slips and falls into the sea.

The parents are understandably in a panic and the dad starts to take the smaller DC back over the rocks towards the shore whilst yelling at the lad to swim to rocks and hold on.

I can see he's in trouble take wellies and waterproofs off yell at DS to stand back from water and go in to rescue him. The tidal conditions made swimming really difficult so I take the lad towards the rocks, calling for the mum to come help him up.

She starts saying she may slip, it's too near the water and can't I take him to shore. Out of breath and not wanting to waste it talking I get to the rocks and with great difficulty get the lad out. As I did this he slipped a bit banging his head and cutting it. I cut my shin quite badly climbing out myself as waves crashed me against the rocks.

Get to the beach and coastguard have arrived and called paramedics. (There's a beach watch thing right by where we were).

Anyway the paramedic arrive after a bit a said the boy needs to go to A&E as he has a head injury and they need to check his lungs. They dressed my shin on scene.

The boy got really upset saying he'd miss his friend party this afternoon - he was actually hysterical but I suspect it was more the shock. The mum looked up and said " well you wouldn't have had to miss it if that stupid cow had taken you to shore instead of throwing you onto the rocks"

I was quite impressed with the coastguard who replied " what the stupid cow who most probably just saved your DS' life?"

AIBU to think she should have done something herself if the way he was rescued was such a problem.

OP posts:

Original poster

drowningyouout · 14/07/2012 19:40

There's some National Sea Insititute or something like that office about 20m away. I suspect they would have helped if no-one else was there. They had called the coastguard (which is about 3 minutes drive down the coast) who were there when we got out. So I guess they acted quickly.

I knew I could get to him. I said it's about 20m off the shore. Actually thinking about the local swimming pool the rocks above the water were about 20m out but they were uncovered on the beach iyswim? It was probably more like about 10-12m and felt like 100!

OP posts:

ToothbrushThief · 14/07/2012 19:40

What an ungrateful woman. I hope she's at home reliving her part in all this and feeling thorughly ashamed.

Meanwhile you can drink a glass or two of and be proud.

SharonGless · 14/07/2012 19:41

Well done drowningyouout

You can rest assured you did the right thing today. Put it down to shock

QOD · 14/07/2012 19:42

Well done!!

ohmeohmy · 14/07/2012 19:43

you are amazing. She is not.

lisad123 · 14/07/2012 19:46

I don't understand why the dad didn't drag boy out and mum take other kid back!
She's a cow and hope she's suitability ashamed of herself!

catsmother · 14/07/2012 19:49

You're brilliant, I know it's a cliche but you really do deserve a medal. Regardless of the fact you're a good swimmer, used to be a lifeguard, know the area etc, you still risked yourself to save someone else. Doing something like you did is never without risk so I really do admire you.

I really hope that it was the shock which made that woman act like such a vile ungrateful cow. I hope when it wears off she'll feel absolutely mortified and at the very least contact the local paper to thank the "unknown woman" who saved her son and to apologise for reacting so badly.

But in the meantime, you should treat yourself - you really do deserve it.

Loshad · 14/07/2012 19:50

yes, me too Lisad, drowning you are a total star, well done to you and a giant shiny star. The other mum was a rude ungrateful fecker

Original poster

drowningyouout · 14/07/2012 19:50

Thanks for asking about DS. He is cool with it - or seems so. He was having a 'go' in the coastguard jeep when the altercation took place.

He saw my friend and I run baywatch style into the sea last summer - when it was actually hot! - to get 2 lads (about 10yo) who were being carried with the tide on their surf/body board things. This was another beach with a HUGE tide - on spring tides it sucks sideways quick and anyone caught in it gets carried along the beach until they hit a sandbank.

OP posts:

OhNoMyFanjo · 14/07/2012 19:50

I hope if dc or I are ever unlucky enough to be on that position there is someone like you there.

Sparklingbrook · 14/07/2012 19:55

Have you had any training?

Northernlurker · 14/07/2012 20:05

Just told dh about this and he wondered if the woman was not in fact the boy's mother. If she was stressing about telling the mother about the incident that might explain her angry response. Or perhaps the man who was there was not the father and again she was stressed about telling the other parent. If her relationship was already difficult with them you can see that having to explain how ds nearly drowned and had a cut on his head wouldn't exactly bring out the best in her.

AppleAndBlackberry · 14/07/2012 20:12

Such a strange reaction but you did an amazing thing regardless.

Original poster

drowningyouout · 14/07/2012 20:12

In the past sparkling I used to be a beach lifeguard after being a cadet for a few years. I also worked for Sunsail and did safety boat duty as well as watersports with children. I do hold a pool safety award and first aid atm - not that holding any qualifications makes rescue failsafe. Just helps you be able to access the risks more and know not to enter the water if your at all unsure it's safe enough to do so.

I was sure I could get to this lad - I know I could of got him to shore but acessing it it was safer to get him on the rocks. For both of us. Trying to get him through the surf/ breakwater could have loosened my grip on him.

If he'd have gone under there was no way I could have got him out - luckily he could swim well enough to stay above water.

OP posts:

AppleAndBlackberry · 14/07/2012 20:13

Think I'm going to practice my swimming a bit more having read this.

PooPooInMyToes · 14/07/2012 20:13

So when the mum was being rude did the dad say anything?

hugglymugly · 14/07/2012 20:13

That mother's reaction seems strange. I can understand her being in shock, but not what she actually said. If they're a local family, they should know about the local (sometime dangerous) conditions. It sounds as though she was trying to deflect the blame (hers and her DH's) onto you.

I would hope that in due time, once she's had time to calm down from what must have been a frightening situation, that she realises she owes you a huge debt of gratitude (as well as an apology).

Original poster

drowningyouout · 14/07/2012 20:14

Northern good point. Lad called her mum though. Dad was with the LO so didn't hear him address him at all. Perhaps he was her son and the little girl was his DD?

OP posts:

Snog · 14/07/2012 20:16

OMG you are a hero with no doubt
Perhaps the mother and child will realise this at some point
Glad the coastguard gave you some recognition for your rescue efforts - well done

Original poster

drowningyouout · 14/07/2012 20:17

poo Dad/ or the man was with the LO in the hut as LO was wet through and being warmed up. I also presume they didn't want her seeing all the blood! The coastguard even took DS to play in the jeep so he didn't have to see my leg being treated. also because despite his sopping wet and bleeding mother he couldn't help but exclaiming how cool it was

OP posts:

Northernlurker · 14/07/2012 20:17

I think if we're going to be charitable then we should asume that wasn't the lad's dad with her and she was anxious, possibly even frightened, about telling her ex. That's if we're feeling charitable which looking at your trousers, leg and seat you probably aren't. Have you tried putting some newspaper on the seat, weighed down slightly. That might soak some water out.

fivegomadindorset · 14/07/2012 20:20

Three boys went out onto the rocks down here in windy weather a few years ago, two are now in our village graveyard.

YADNBU

Original poster

drowningyouout · 14/07/2012 20:31

Northern I have and my friend has a gazebo so tomorrow we're gonna air it on her driveway!

I agree with being charitable. I have said throughout that I don't think she just stood there letting him drown/ potentionally drown. I can only imagine the fear she was feeling and seeing her DS in complete hysterics and shock and then worried about missing the party that she just said the first thing that came to mind. I can just imagine how in this situation you can lash out at the person who's just gashed your sons head! I doubt she'd even digested the rest of it.

I came to MN because it's a safe place and I can work through my feelings on it anonemously iyswim?

And to a 6yo missing a party is a big deal!

OP posts:

Northernlurker · 14/07/2012 20:34

You're a lovely person!

DontEatTheVolesKids · 14/07/2012 20:37

She was probably in shock & all mixed up.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6 ··· 9 10