to not sit on my DFs' sofa?

[ChaosTrulyReigns]

Now I have the never erasable knowledge that they frequenty have c-e-x on it.

Bleurgh.

It's not wipeable pleather either.

We had to replace a sofa after DH (then BF) and I had way too mich sex on it every friday when the kids were at their dad's
It collapsed at one end and I wasn't leaning over the arm at all

I only ever have sex on the couch. Dd2 is still in with us, so we don't want to wake her. In fact the bed is the only place I don't have sex.
I don't think my friends would care.

My DF proudly told me in lurid detail all about their frequent c-e-x (?) on the beautiful white sofa on which I was having tea & cake.
She expected me to be then saw I was so reassured me that she always covered it with a sheet first.

Who said romance is dead?

I like to tell my childless friends that I gave birth on our sofa. They pull great faces

Sex is for wherever two consenting adults fancy! As long as no children around or objecting adults!

I had sex on the sofa, bed, park, on top of a wheelie bin, up the wall, floor, snow, car, sports stadium, bus stop lolol

hotel bed, swimming pool, the sea, top floor of a tower block, i went to a swinging club once etc I couldn't have sex there, it was not my thing.

haha this made it on to the talk round up.

Funny!

Chaos must've only dun the CEX 4 times if my maths is correct :O Maybe 5

WOOHOO! This made the roundup! That brightened up the end of a grotty day!

ah just ask to join in next time. Then you wont mind sitting on it :)

Chaos, how exactly were you told about it - proudly by the participants or sneakily by someone peering through the window?

I am a community psychiatric nurse and I used to visit a client whose partner had killed himself on the sofa, there was nowhere else in the lounge to sit except the sofa ( he bagged the computer chair next to his computer ) so "The sofa of death" it was every time. Makes a c-e-x sofa seem happy by comparison.

Top of a 37 bus. Behind the Afghan restaurant on Chelverton Road. Train going from Waterloo to Putney. A gig or three. All with the same chap.
Those were the days!

I am also nearly a virgin. I fear DP (partner of 7 years, friend of 12 years and father of my children) will never give in and admit it is his turn to buy some condoms. I was going to do it (to show I am better person) but he has now gone away with work until the 30th of July.... We are both stubborn fools, but we have both taken it too far this time

OP...this might freak you out a bit but every time someone kisses you on the cheek, just imagine where their mouth might have been......

I'm imaging several scenarios as to how OP came by this information but perhaps it was something like this???
Chaos "I heard someone had a sofa of death, can you imagine sitting on something so freaky??"
friend " well have had kinky fuckery allll over exactly where you are sitting right now"

I am also crying with laughter at this whole thread, thank goodness for the talk roundup!!

c-e-x is fine. I thought it was going to be one of those 'my Dad lets the Alsatian sleep on the sofa - AIBU to insist on a plastic sheet before I sit down?' ones.

One of the funniest threads I´ve read in a while.

Was laughing so much teenage daughter told me not to forget to breathe

"It's not the sex, is it, it's the telling."-yes-how did that come about?

I thought this thread was about a DFS sofa

Yes, do tell us exactly how the telling came about!