To expect house guest to leave room clean

[kitkatco]

I have just had an friend staying for a few days. She was here to watch the tennis. When she left, I went up to strip the bed etc and the guest bathroom had been left in a mess. Hairs in the shower and basin and poo on the sides of the toilet bowl, bin not emptied. This is not a B&B - who does she think is going to clean up? She knows I am a busy working mum - albeit part-time - AIBU to be seriously pissed off with her!! She left while I was at work today and left a lovely card and flowers but I am still really cross.

YANBU...

She left shit on the toilet? I'd die rather than ever leave a toilet like that for anyone to see. Some people are just weird though and have no shame about these things.

Nice that she left the flowers and chocs but disgusting about the toilet.

I would empty the bin if i was staying with someone I knew like a mate and knew she was a busy working parent. I don't see the role of being a guest as being one where your host looks after you hand and foot!

I wouldn't expect a guest to empty a bin or strip a bed. Or clean the bathroom. Leaving the toilet very dirty is not acceptable though if there was a brush. Though Kim and Aggie said loo brushes should be banned!

I have already agreed that IABU on the bins. It's the hair and skid marks.
Why wouldn't you clean up after yourself MrsBC?

She left shit on the toilet? I'd die rather than ever leave a toilet like that for anyone to see.

If you've got to go, you've got to go, and if there is no loo brush...

I don't agree with emptying the bin (although, as a guest, I would have done so) but there's no way I would expect to clean poo from the guest toilet. That's just vile. I probably wouldn't strip the beds, just leave them folded back.

Viviennemary I know what Kim & Aggie said but that's because they said you need to put on your marigolds and give it a good scrub. Which i do do , and do NOT expect my guests to do, but for the last time THERE IS A LOO BRUSH AND TOILET CLEANER next to the bloody toilet and pulling her long hair out of the plug hole made me gag.

I can't work it out.
YABU in many ways as she is your guest and you should be happy that she brought flowers etc. It's not a hotel but equally she should feel relaxed enough not to be fussing with bin bags.

Yanbu about poo streaks. Yuck. But then again, I've noticed some houses with people who I'd consider quite tidy seem to be blind to poo-pebbledash in the loo.

But YABU about stripping the bed linen. I NEVER do this at anyones house. I make the bed tidy, so it looks nice. But once I stripped the bed linen before a friend could say anything and found that underneath the blanket over the matress and under the sheet was a mammoth old period stain. Pillows and duvets can be equally yellow stainy and embarrassing (despite being clean) so I've never made that mistake again. Said friend was mortified when I came downstairs with the linen.

YANBU. She should leave the rooms how she found them, in my opinion. It's disgusting leaving a dirty toilet - who the hell doesn't tidy up after themselves in the toilet? Why are people assuming there was no way of cleaning it?

"Why wouldn't you clean up after yourself MrsBC?"

Where did I say that?

HopeForTheBest - thank you. I know i sound petty, but it was a gross way to end the day and as I've said, my DH and DSs all clean up the toilet after themselves and I would expect a grown woman to be quite capable of doing the same!

The guest room was sparking when she arrived with fresh flowers etc and I certainly do NOT expect a guest to get it back to that state, but I DO expect them not to leave it filthy either.

LaQueen, it's lovely that you make so much effort, but wouldn't the smile be wiped from your face if you saw they'd left the toilet in a disgusting state?

She's a guest, but primarily she's the OP's friend. Who wants their friend to have to scrub their toilet?

Pre MN I actually had no idea people "cleaned up after themselves" in toilets. (Unless I'd had diahrea or something). I cleaned the one at home once a week, and assumed others were similar. I don't think I ever actually looked in toilets...

What do people actually do then? Get toilet tissue and rub? Without gloves?!

Also re the poo streaks - vile as they may be, perhaps she hadn't realised? Most people (I hope), close the lid when they flush, so perhaps she didn't check it again?

I have a lot of guests to stay at my house (mostly family and close friends). Some of them strip the bed when they leave, some don't. Some leave hair in the shower and on the floor, some don't. It really doesn't bother me a jot either way. I always fully clean the bedroom and en suite after they have left so it makes no difference.

Not go round the house cleaning everywhere - clean her very own shit off the toilet ONLY she used during her week here to watch the tennis. And as I said quite a few times, all I expect is to leave toilet, shower, basin relatively clean and not dirty enough to gross me out.

I think most people give the loo a quick once over if they see it's got a bit dirty.

The rest though, YABU.

Anyway, IABU sitting here whining about it, if I wasn't chatting on MN then the shower room would already be clean and forgotten about. (slinks off to get on with her chores)

i still think the emptying the bin thing is unreasonable - but there's no excuse for skid marks

YABU

The most i would expect guest to do and they have done is nothing really! they usually leave bed tidy but there is no point as strip sheets anyway, leave towl nicely on bed - again nice but going in washing machine, WOULD NEVER expect bin to be emptied, re loo - no great - BUT maybe she just didnt see it?

re hairs, totally ridiculous of you.
The fact you mentioned bin though makes me think you are a bit anal so i dont trust you on other stuff even though relented on bin.

poor guest!

Kitkatco I was only joking when I said about Kim and Aggie!! And anyway you've a right to moan if you want to. I moan about loads of stuff whether it's reasonable or not.

Along the same vein as the stained mattress, a friend of mine once stayed with me and must have had her period as she hung her towel up in the shared bathroom with a big streak of brown blood on it

Also, when my mum comes to stay she leaves the sink with foundation and powder all over it, lipstick on the white sheets and bottles of mineral water strewn around the room

Everyone is different.......it just makes me laugh!