Summer holidays

[cheekypickle]

DD is still going to childminders in the summer holidays, DH wants her to go and thinks it will give me spare time to do what I want

What would you get upto? I think I'm going to get pretty bored!

is she going to be there every day? Are you off work? My 2 are going to a sports centre kids club from 9-1 for 3 days each week of the holidays so I can go to fitness classes, shop in peace, etc

She'll be there every day. I'm a teacher so I won't be going to work

Depends, in your situation I'd appreciate some time for myself but I'm a SAHM with 2 year old twins. Maybe split it so that you have some time for yourself and some time with DD, doing nothing or going for days out somewhere. Do you still pay CM whatever you choose?

That's going to be a lot of spare time - every day for 6 weeks.
Is that all day every day?

I assume you will have some school work to do in that time if you are a teacher?

Not sure - a hobby, the gym?

If you already know you're likely to be bored can your DD not stay out of the childminders for some days each week so you can go out and about and do something together?

Pickle, you will find something to do!

Maybe channel your creative side with some crafts or some creative writing, go for some nice long walks.

Nothing too taxing, just... relax.

You need to do what's right for you.

Did you follow up on any of the advice on your other threads, regarding contacting your local MH team?

You do seem to be having trouble accepting the choices you are making, and I'm not sure that the myriad opinions of strangers on the net are going to do much for your peace of mind.

I contacted health team yes. Going to see physcologist on Thursday.

Find mumsnet helpful with opinions/ideas

Some of 'do what I want' would certainly be doing things with my child - going to the park or whatever.

I'd spend time getting fitter, preferably in fun ways - biking, watersports, interesting walks. Gardening (mine really went wild when DD was little, only just getting it tamed again).

could you arrange to pick her up early some days and maybe arrange some all day things with her so you are not on your own all the time.

I'm with Obi..it seems like you have put this question up expecting people to have a go at you because you are putting your DD in daycare whilst you are not working.

People cannot judge you till they walk in your shoes...do what is best for you - if you are happier, your DD will be!

Find yourself, meet friends, chill a bit and just do things that you cant/dont normally do.

Dont spend time feeling guilty about the choices you are making, it is no ones business but yours and your families.

Thank you :)

What do YOU want? I personally would rather spend the time with my child.

I want to spend more time with her

Cheeky I would come off this thread now or people disagreeing with your choice is going to fuck with your head even more!! What they want doesnt matter, its what is best for you.

I have unashamedly put my DCs into summer camp for half the summer, even though this is 'time off' for me (I'm studying for exams ATM that aren't imminent though and a writer). I will still have them for 6 full weeks though (3 month summer holidays - gah!)

It means I have caught up with the housework, made lovely suppers every night, watched an episode of 'Revenge' (ah bliss) every day. I have not been bored even for a second.

What i have done though, is not left them in day camp all the time. If it's a lovely day, they bunk off and we go to the beach, or I pick them up early to go for an ice cream and the park. And in fairness, they adore daycamp with their friends.

Does your DD like your CM? That makes a difference as to leaving her. How about letting her go for just half days or shortened days so you feel less guilty.
And do something creative with your spare time. Go for walks, meet friends for lunch (other teachers?) and go paint a masterpiece.
How hard work is your DD?

do a mix then. She could go to the childminder some days and then be with you other days - it doesnt have to be all or nothing. I felt a bit selfish about putting dd and ds into the kids club 3 days a week but it gives me a chance of time to myself and to do my own things. They also get company of other children rather than fighting with each other

Well if you want to see her then do what you want, not your husband.

I'd be lead by what you think is best. If you'd like to spend time with her over the summer holidays then consider cutting down some of the time she'll be with the childminder. That way you get the best of both worlds. If you'd rather spend all the holidays with her then tell your dh that this is your wish and you'd like him to respect it.

Is this the same husband who spends his weekend taking 4 hour naps each day? Seems he doesn't want to spend much time with her, and doesn't want you to either!

Pickle, I completely agree with betty.

Anyone who 'knows' you from here will tell you the same thing.

You can see how you feel on the day- if you feel like picking her up early or wagging it completely for the day, tell the childminder.

If you don't and you want to relax or get some planning done or something, do that.

No one worth listening to would have a problem with that.

It's not about what we would do. It's about what you want to do!

There is absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to spend time with your child.

I think you should speak to your DH and childminder and come to an agreement that maybs she only goes a couple of days a week.

My dd was out for a couple ofhours today and i didnt know what to do with myself.

Do what you feel is best for you and your child.

I would split the time. I crave time to myself and a day without kids would be heavenly - a trip to the hairdressers, a chance to browse round bookshops, a coffee in a cafe with a good book. But I would also want to spend my holiday time having some quality days out at the park with my DC, going for picnics or just having lazy family days.

Nothing wrong with wanting child free time, nothing wrong with spending time with them. Find a balance that works for you.