to not let my MIL feed my child rubbish

[bananananana]

I have a 1 year old, my in-laws see her regularly with me or my DH. My MIL wants DD for the day, all to herself.

My problem with this is she will feed her crap. She buys 'meat' by the carrier-bag load from a man who sits in his car outside the local pub all day with it in his boot. She has cupboards full of crisps and sweets and junk and tries to force it down my DD when we visit, she filled her bottle with fizzy pop when she was 6months old!! They live on takeaways and fast food. I have know them for 7 years and have never sighted a fruit or vegetable in their home.

When DD is older I won't mind her eating the occasional junk meal or naughty snack, but I don't want my one year old being fed McDonald's and chocolate.

So AIBU to not allow her to spend the day there? Or to send a packed lunch/dinner?

OP put a banana a yoghurt and maybe a meal or a sadwhich in for her dont go over board iyswim

Yanbu.

I want to know more about the man who sells 'meat' from the boot of his car. Wtf?!

The meat thing is an ongoing issue, I've questioned it but she's tight and it's cheap (I wonder why!?) so she sees no problem with it. She mostly brings home carrier bags full of unspecified mince, loose in the carrier bag, it's pretty much the only thing she will cook from scratch. Questionable mince with chips, questionable mince in a pie, questionable mince in a bun.

Nobody has died yet but still, it's out of a fucking car boot.

Anyway, I spoke to her this evening and we have arranged for them to have DD on Friday. I said "I'll send over a packe lunch and a few snacks so you don't have to worry about feeding her" and she took it well. She's planning on taking DD out to the park or somewhere for the day so the lunchbox will be handy.

I would expect anyone who looks after dd to stick to the rules dp and I have set out. We don't have loads, just about using a carseat in the car and no sugary stuff until she's older (and no leaving to cry it out). We have made these clear to mil, and while she doesn't totally agree she will go with it anyway.

Can you sit down with pil and explain your rules? Then say they can look after your dc if they will follow them.

It's trickier if you think they might just ignore you anyway. If that's the case I'd probably only let them have supervised access to your dc.

Just ignore. Your children live with you - they will not become obese because they visit their grandparents once a week. It is much more important for your kids to have a healthy relationship with Gran than worry about a bag of crisps.

Occasional unhealthy snacks wiil not make your children permanantly ill or addicted to junk food

Do you a have basic (Foundation level) qualification in biology?