To get a dog

[Charliefarlie1192]

I am a single parent to ds age 7, we have a cat who only ever comes home to eat and lost our other cat on the main road. I positively HATE being alone in the house and ds's father has shared custody. I love dogs and now the cat has gone i feel i need another living being here.

The thing is, I live in a flat, and work mon-thurs 9-.30-3pm

I agree mainly with Rhubarb, although with a dedicated owner with time on their hands living in a flat shouldn't matter. It would make things more difficult, but not impossible.

Also many, many rescue dogs come from family homes and would be fine with children, more likely than not better with children than a puppy would be.

I am concerned you said you wanted a smaller dog. Most small breeds, JRTs in particular, actually need more exercise than larger breeds. My JRT/Fox Terrier X quite literally eats my house out of frustration on the rare occasions he gets less than 60 minutes good quality exercise (think running along side a bike, hill walking, fetch etc. not just a gentle stroll around the park)

It could be possible for you to have a dog if you can afford a dog walker (a paid one, who will not let you down) come in half way through the day for a minimum of an hour and if you are 100% certain you can afford the added expense of a dog and are willing to walk the dog before and after work, immediately on coming home/getting up, no matter what the weather is like, because the dog will need to toilet.

And any kind of terrier breed is out of the question completely. As are puppies. A sighthound might suit the exercise you can provide but they tend to be very needy dogs and do not like being left alone so a dog walker/doggy day care would be an absolute must.

If she puts the kid to bed at around 7pm then I'm guessing walkies would be 6pm so what does the mutt do when it needs a bedtime shit or piss?

IME you let the dogs out last thing at night so you don't wake up to a mess.

And most rescue dogs have issues. Well most of them are Staffies for starters then you get the ones that have proven too much for their owners or the dumped puppies - none of which are suitable for the OP.

Sorry, life sucks sometimes and you can't have everything you want. Deal with it. Dogs and flats aren't meant to go together and this tale will have a sorry ending if you go ahead regardless.

I wouldnt get a dog if you are out at work a lot, its not fair!! Dogs arent independent like cats and need more attention...wait until you have more time to devote to it.

After a busy day at work and sorting your DC out are you really going to have time time and inclination to devote to a dog....honestly??

It will be a novelty at first, it wont last long though.

Staffies are excellent dogs with children. A lot of dogs these days are dumped in rescues because of marital breakdowns, emigration, finances or loss of housing and have come from loving family homes with no more issues than the average family puppy.

A lot of rescues work with foster homes, particularly sighthound rescues, where the dogs may have been fostered with children.

Dogs and flats are far from the ideal, but if the owner is dedicated enough it can work. For night time toileting OP would have to leave the child sleeping and go out onto the front/communal gardens (with a baby monitor) some smaller sighthounds can be litter trained but this isn't ideal and not something I would recommend.

I do agree that OP does not seem prepared for the amount of work that having a dog takes (or money) and that her reasons for getting a dog are not especially sound.

In this case I would strongly advise OP to think very carefully before committing to a dog. But in general rescue dogs are often the better choice for families with children and living in a flat shouldn't be a complete obstacle. It will make it harder, yes, but not impossible. In this case it would be the working hours and finances that would concern me, and the lack of knowledge and experience, not the living arrangements.

Please do not get a dog! Plenty of people "want" a dog but are not in a position to meet all of their needs.

I waited until I worked part time. I have 2 who take up a lot of time. Let out for a wee 1st thing. Then 2 hours of free off lead runing/hunting in the morning.

Let out for a wee in the afternoon, then another 2 hours of exercise either running with me or out with the bike, then lastly down to the field for a late night toilet break.

It is not fun in horizontal rain but I have never missed a walk or thought "sod it half an hour will do tonight" - it won't! and I owe it to them to give them the best life possible - there is a saying that we have our work, our family and our friends - our dogs have only us

I think the novelty would soon wear off in your situation and what will you do when it gets the runs or needs to be sick in the night? Can you see yourself getting up to take it out numerous times?

To give you an idea of the cost of a dog OP, mine have cost me a small fortune this week. This a breakdown of the costs of just one of them:

Food: £6.23
Collar (hers is becoming worn) £13
Blood tests £60
Spaying £143.50
Flea treatment for the dog £9
Flea spray for the house £22
Poop bags 0.99p
Worming tablets £5
Training treats £3

I was attacked by a "lovely" Staffie.
They were originally bred as fighting dogs.
I wouldn't advise someone with a child, who is not used to dogs, to get a Staffie.
I have worked with dogs and ime Staffies can exhibit a Jekyll and Hyde character which makes them potentially more dangerous than some other dogs because you just never know when it's going to turn round and attack. As I found out to my cost.

Staffies were actually bred to be bull baiters, they were later used as fighting dogs. They were expected to fight other dogs, not people.

It is this breeding that makes them so great with people. A fighting dog must accept being handled by strangers even in a state of high arousal. Any dog which showed aggression towards a handler was not bred from because they were not suitable for the sport.

Dog aggression does not equal people aggression.

Any breed of dog can turn suddenly in the wrong circumstances. A staffy is no more likely to turn than any other breed of dog, in fact their love of people probably makes them less likely to turn.

Please let's not turn this into a staffy bashing thread. It's boring. It's the same old shit that is hashed out on these threads time and time again. It never changes. No one ever learns anything.

Consider a retired racing Greyhound. It never necessarily follows that big dogs need big houses. The majority of ex racers are kind, calm and lazy buggers who sleep all day. Some are fine with cats. The other positive aspect is that the Greyhound charities have amazing staff who are very good at matching the dogs character to your family. Greyhound people are always a bit nutty in my experience which makes them awesome rescue charities!
Don't even consider a Lab, Collie or retreiver at the moment in my opinion.

I don't agree with the rescue dogs will definitely bite your children train of thought. Ours certainly hasn't. As has been said already there are loads of dogs in rescue homes for all different reasons. You could be fine with an older more sedate little guy. I don't think it is a massively long day either - especially as your sister said she would come at lunch time. I think the main issue you will be up against is your little one and the walking. You'll have to walk the dog before work and that means that your child will have to go out too, for an hour every day before school. It's a big ask I think, and from experience the enthusiasm will soon vanish!
Good luckw ith what you do, I defo agree about going and talking to some rescues, i bet there's someone out there for you, who'd prefer a loving home to being left in kennels.

thats what I mean, they did know and it was a reputable place but STILL got a dog that did damage and was unsuitable for them

D0oin, happy to leave it however I have not ever contributed on a staffy thread and I can count on one hand the amount of times I've been on a dog thread.

I grew up surrounded by dogs. My mother bred them, my brother trained them for the army and now he breeds them too.
I worked as a kennel maid on a YTS scheme when I was 17.

So I've been around a fair few dogs. I can only speak from my experiences as you can from yours.
Every single dog has the potential to be dangerous. As you rightly say, it is mainly due to handling and breeding that affects their personalities. But the more powerful a dog is, the more dangerous is its potential. People buy staffies because they are fairly small, but they have no idea of the power in those muscles, so when things go wrong with a staffie, they go very very wrong.

Is that fair? I think so.

Yes they are very powerful dogs, despite their compact size but then the same can be said for JRTs and they don't get anywhere near the bad press that staffies get.

That's because there are more staffies around statistically, so along with that comes more problems.

TheRhubarb

1. without deabting getting staffies, i would not get a staffy in small flat and without commintment to walk dog for a long time.

2. Rhubarb, a small older dog - small lap dog NOT JR ...would be fine for op,

3. op - do your research, read up about dog breeds, you sound like you need a dog like mine.

4. there is a dog out there for you somewhere dogs are all indivuals.

5. it was a year before I found my little dog,

6. my dog doesnt bite! I am not saying she isnt capable but she hasnt yet. she does not smell, she is hypoallernagenic - that means she is suitable for people who are allergic to dogs, they dont shed!

7. our insurance is £6.70 a month.

8. we use dry food a bag lasts about a month and costs £5 something

9. dogs can be trained when to toilet! you may have a few accidents while the dog adjusts to your routine....and when you feed it.

10. millions of dogs out there in rescues, really sad some people would say leave the dog there rather than try and find one suitable for your home,.

11. if you get a dog and its not suitable or has major problems - you can return them!

12. research research research

Wow you really are keen for her to get a dog eh?

"if you get a dog and its not suitable or has major problems - you can return them!" Nice attitude to have.

I would never encourage someone to get a dog when that dog will be kept in a flat for up to 6 hours a day, 4 days a week.

A small lap dog with a 7 year old boy?

Well, whatever. It's up to her and if you want to encourage her, nothing I can say will dissuade you. I don't really care one way or the other. It'll just be another statistic, that's all.

I've got a JR terrier and he needs a lot of exercise.

I, too have a JR terrier and would strongly advise that you don't confuse them with dogs that don't require exercise and attention. Quite the opposite, in fact since an "under-employed" JR will run rings around you. Literally.

An older dog, familiar with your household could manage to be left for that length of time but you couldn't contemplate leaving a pup for that long. Also, it isn't good enough to have an arrangement whereby someone might come and check on the dog. What if they don't? You don't mention whether you have a garden either. Because are you really prepared to take the dog out for a walk every time it wants to relieve itself?

It sounds like a great plan to have a dog but sometimes you have to realise that right now may not be the best time.

11. if you get a dog and its not suitable or has major problems - you can return them!

"if you get a dog and its not suitable or has major problems - you can return them!" Nice attitude to have.

I am keen for a dog to be resuced.

Its not MY attitude - all rescues, say - please return dog if you cant cope!!!!

dogs can have behaviour problems that op cant cope with its well within her rights to return the dog.

I have been dealing with rescues for a year!

really sad some people would say leave the dog there rather than try and find one suitable for your home

No one said that, what a stupid way to twist things.

Eliza that is a horrible attitude to have - dogs are not disposable items to be passed on when you can no longer be arsed to put the time and work in - shame on you!

Would also disagree on £5.00 per month on a bag of food. Mine cost a fortune to feed but then I choose not to feed them budget supermarket brand processed shite - feed the best you can afford and don't cut corners on this.

the 'return' policy is not there so you can try before you buy shock Do you have any idea how damaging it is for a dog to be shunted from home to rescue to home to rescue?

of course not but sometimes other problems may crop up....battersea had dog in kennel - when got home it did a ton of damage....the fmaily held onto it and with batterseas help sorted out the problem eventually...

All rescues says, please don't get dog if you think you can't cope.

That's why they have home visits and interviews and why dogs are carefully picked and placed.
If you know of rescues that are not following these procedures then they should be reported.

How can you feed a dog for £5 per month? My cat costs more than that a week!