To expect my dcs to do more around the house?

[lunamoon]

Ok this is a general moan and more of a wwyd type of question.
I have 3 dcs 15, 13 and 10 plus a dh and a cat!

I have had a rant over the weekend about the lack of housework that the dcs do.
I am not expecting them to do lots of jobs, I am fine with myself and dh, although mainly me, doing the vast majority of chores.
However what I am not fine about is the lack of consideration shown by dcs over things like not tidying up after themselves.
What I mean by this is things like:
Not moving shoes from the bottom of the stairs
leaving used dishes/plates on the dinner table or around the house
not emptying or loading the dishwasher after I have cooked a meal
Asking me to get things for them that are not to han, and quite often in another room.
Leaving clothes and towelks on the bathroom floor
Not rinsing the shower/bath out after themselves.

Am I just a moaning old sod.
I feel like I am on a viscious cycle of asking, then asking AGAIN getting cross, moaning, shouting, then threatening ie if you do not put your plate in the diswasher then I will not cook for you next mealtime.

I feel my kids have a good life. Both myself and dh do lots of running around for them etc.

I have always expected them to do a certain amount of chores so it is nothing new.
Where am I going wrong?!!!!!!!!!!

Sorry to be blunt but the fact that you DO run around after them is exactly why they are like this.

Time to stop running around after them. Set a list of house rules and all the family have to stick to them.

Why have you let them do this?
My children are a lot younger than yours and have laways done the things you want yours to do.

Thanks for the replies.
One of the problems is that I cannot stand to see clothes etc left in the living room. I just shut their bedroom doors if they are a mess, advice given to a friend of mine by a counsellor. But I know that eventually I will crack and do the tidying up in the communal aresa. I am not obsessive about housework btw but feel and have told dcs this, that I spend far too much time picking things up after them.
Tried the lists and think will do again.

Maybe say to then that anything left outside their bedrooms (that belongs in their bedrooms) will be taken off them if they dont take it with then at bedtime?

I have exactly the same problem... But my dc were great when they were younger but now its nearly impossible to get them to move their crap!

We used to work as a team,so i would do kitchen&dd did dining room&ds living room. Then i would do bathroom whilst ds hoovered&dd would take all the bits&bobs off stairs. We would all do our own rooms.

Then they turned into teenagers!!

I shut the bedroom doors but its impossible to get them to help out. If i dont do it,it dosnt get done. Ds washing has been on the line since wed!!

I swore i wouldnt let my ds turn into lazy slobs,when they were little.I thought i had trained them!?!

If anyone knows the answer,let me know!!!

Shelly that is exactly it.

They have always been expected to help and did so when they were young.Ds even used to ask if he could wash the car and clean the inside too. Then he used to want to hoover. Now it is completely different.
It is no use me threatening that unless they put clothes in linen bin I won't wash them as ds would quite happily wear clothes covered in mud, in fact I have to tell him to get in the bath!!!
He also will wear screwed up, creased clothes but I don't feel comfortable letting him go to school in a uniform splattered in crap, I feel it reflects badly on me!

I am hopling they will grow out of it?!!!!!!

Oh and when ds went on a 6 day school trip he wore 2 pairs of socks the entire time. One for evening and the other pair for playing sports every day!!!
His feet stank when he got back so cleanliness is of no great importance to him.
Someone please come along and tell me this will change without me nagging.

Two pairs of socks.... well that's better than one of mine. When he was 13 he went on a 4 day trip and didn't change at all! Everything came back unworn including his PJs!!

He is at uni now and the washing/cleaning/laundry is still worse than when he was 7......

Creamteas- he wore one for all his sports matches then I'm guessing came back to the accomodation and put his other pair on when he got changed out of his sportswear. All his other socks were folded in the exact place where I had packed them!

I think the crux lies in that my teenagers do not find it fun anymore to help out.
When they are little it is quite easy to cajole them into helping by making it some kind of game but it isn't working anymore.

My 12 year old was staying at a friend's after school one night. I told him to leave his bag by the door and I'd drop it round to save him taking an extra bag to school.
That evening I found said bag, right by the door as planned. However, it was suspiciously light. It was completely empty!!

GAAAAAHHH!

Anyway, same here -shoes at bottom of stairs, towels on bathroom floor, crumbs all over table, socks everywhere... They jump to it when I nag but I wish I didn't have to!

Euphemia- Because if I didn't pack his bag then he probably wouldn't even have 2 pairs of socks!

Loopyluna- i'm relieved vit isn't just my kids.
I have just had a moan at the youngest now.
Been watching tv in my bed. Left it in a right state.
I've told her she is banned from my room now.
Her shoes still at the bottom iof the bloody stairs.

Kids who'd av em.
Oh and eldest rang to ask if I will pick her up, she has been out with her mates. I've said no as had a glass of wine, trying to calm my nerves a bit. So she has asked her granny who has agreed to bring her home.