to think people are so negative

[youngmummy17]

DS was BF for almost 18 months, we was in a cafe, BF welcome which i made sure of, this cafe was in the middle of the town centre very open, Mothercare was busy didn't fancy being crushed into a baby changing room and ds was crying for his feed so i discretely as possible BF him, girls walked past and caught eye of what was doing and just us out laughing they, told their friends and i had around 4 people look back and point and laugh at me BF DS, not only was it the most mortifying experience of my life after that i never BF in public again, i felt like shit afterwards and just and to slap this bitch, AIBU to think people are so negative of women BF in public, i mean i don't point and laugh at people eating their sandwich in public!

I think that you are just sensitive because of your age. I bf everywhere-I can't remember any comments, but it wouldn't have bothered me-but then I was over double the age of OP. (Sadly they probably wouldn't have done it in the first place with an older woman).

Oh I don't know, I was a young mother and a cow in Mothercare sneered at me and made me cry when my baby was a few months old. I still wish fire and brimstone on all Mothercare stores 16 years later.

When you are young and feel a bit vulnerable I can see why the OP is still dwelling on it a bit.

Er I was 32 when I had my first baby and I think I'd have been hurt and upset if a group of strangers had pointed and laughed at me. Not when my baby was older, but at 4 months, certainly yes.

It is a very aggressive act, whatever the age of the person on the receiving end.

I think it's also important to say that the OP herself was only 17 at the time before people start telling her to 'get a grip'. The girls taking the piss were silly and immature but they were also her peers which probably made the whole thing worse. Certainly BFing in public when I was that age probably would have made me die on the spot so kudos for doing it at all OP :)

I'm always amazed how many stories I hear about some nobber being really negative about BFing in public. I really hope they are just one offs as I have all this ahead of me...

Mind you I'm a beast when sleep deprived so am confident that if some twat complete stranger has a go about my baby when she arrives I will tell them to go and fuck themselves :o

How do you know they were laughing at you breast feeding?

I'd say it's far more likely they were smiling at how cute your baby was.

Mind you, give then fact some people on MN could take offence in an empty room with no pictures on the walls.....who knows?

That said, I breastfed in public when I was a young mother and nobody every said anything negative, all I got were nods and smiles from old ladies, but in the main I was ignored by everyone and this was years ago in a place where most people (especially younger mothers) bottle fed.

So not to take anything away from the OP's upset, I think people commenting on BF is far rarer in reality than is sometimes assumed.

I do however think that you are more sensitive when young.

LOL at "smiling at how cute your baby was" - did you actually read what the OP said?

I can understand that you being only 17 and it more unusual to see mums that young BF (usually it seems to be older hags like myself) then it could affect your confidence etc. It wasn't nice of them and only makes them look like fools but I can understand it might upset you.

However I didn't find people negative to BF in public. I BF two babies everywhere, at the table in restaraunts, in the park, on planes sitting next to strange men. I really don't recall any negativity so don't let this one incident define your views.

LOL at "smiling at how cute your baby was" - did you actually read what the OP said?

Yes

I bf 4 children and never ever received any comments negative or positive.

However I can be quite scary looking and would have, in ops place, stood up( put boob away first) and asked her very loudly why she was staring at my tits. Also I would have got security involved.

Still op move on. Not worth dwelling on although I can't think of any 17 year old girls or boys I know ( and know lots) who act like this.

are you sure they were laughing at the breast feeding?

I think that you were unlucky coming across a group of immature girls who are happy to intimidate whoever they can.

These groups do exist and if it wasn't you bf, they could have found something else.

I only ever had negative comments when i bf my first, at 18 (26 years ago), was from some of my peer group and HCP's.

I fed everywhere, including standing outside of Kwiksave and Asda, before there where mum & baby rooms.

I think what happened to you sounds horrible and I'm not surprised you were and are upset.

But I also think you should work to put it behind u. You were unlucky to encounter some horrid, immature girls but you have done a wonderful thing to bf your baby. You have given him the best possible start in life and should be really proud of yourself :)

To answer your question, I bf both dcs over the last 3 years and found most people positive about bfing, altho some people did seem to be made uncomfortable by it.

I've not had MN for long, and i've seen a lot of BF threads recently and stuff in the press so i just thought i'd ask, it's behind me as i no longer BF, i think i find it more upsetting to be told to 'get a grip', I'm not as thick skinned as some older mothers, it just stuck with me still as after that i never BF in public as i was to scared of being laughed at.

Sorry if I upset you but I do think you are being overly sensitive. To get through life more easily you do need to develop a thicker skin.

huh! maybe you need to develop a thicker skin if you plan on posting in AIBU regularly.

But luckily the real world is generally a nicer place than AIBU

"AIBU to think people are so negative of women BF in public, i mean i don't point and laugh at people eating their sandwich in public!" Yes, YABU. You had one bad experience and seem to think that there's a lot of negativity out there about bf'ing. There isn't. There are a few idiots but most people are very nice or just don't care about it.