to expect a visit from in laws

[somethingstupid]

We live a fair distance away from PIL and it is really difficult and expensive to go and see them. Today have just found out that they are visiting DH's grandfather who lives about 2 hours away from us. We have just had DD2's birthday and it is her party on Saturday so a visit would have been nice or even just to pre-warn us. Does not seem to bother DH but really annoys me!

Two hours is still quite far...how far away do they live from you?

ring them and ask them if they are coming over to you? two hours is still a fair drive from you too though..

Did you invite them?

It takes about four hours to get to them from ours and we live between where they live and where granddad lives so they are not adding a huge amount to their journey by doing a detour to our house on the way back from visiting him. It also breaks their journey up - we have offered that they can stay over in the past.

We did not know they were going but when we found out we did invite them and they were indecisive.

I know they are fours away but I just don't understand why you didn't you invite when you were planning the party? On the flip side, they could've called to see if they could stop by to see GCs on their way to seeing granddad.
Maybe you are not a close family.

It also depends on what type of visit to granddad. Are they just doing a regular visit or are is it a more involve visit with doing handiwork around the house or medical care? One allows for more flexibility, the other not so much.

My in laws went on a cruise and the ship was due to sail from a port down south. They live in the northwest. We live in the south east. They didn't tell us. We didn't see them. And they are always banging on about how 'it's a shame' we don't live closer/they can see us more etc. we would have been v happy to drive to the port for lunch or something (so not even expecting them to drive to us!!).

It costs getting on for £200 for us to visit them and them to visit us and although DH would love to see them more (and they always say the same) we only usually see them once or twice a year when we visit. For them the cost is so prohibitive and their working hours. When they have visited us in the past they have stayed in a hotel as ours is too cramped for them so that bumps the cost up even more. Unless it is a major birthday and party there is no way they could come just for DD having a few friends round. I just find it frustrating that with all the reasons why they can't usually visit when they are literally driving past us and are coming anyway why they can't pop in.