to be sick of being treated like a 'mug'

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I am so tired of 'friends' treating me like an absolute mug. I know it is my own fault as I have allowed them to do so in the past (possibly the present) but it is seriously p1ssing me off now. I would do anything for anyone but it gets to the point when they should realise they are expecting a lot more from me then I would hope for from others.

This weeks example is visiting a friend on Sunday as she'd asked me to mock interview her. Spent a few hours helping her. She had interview yesterday and she text me and said 'ring me so I can tell you how it went'. Felt like texting back 'ring me for once!'

I do proofreading of essays and job applications for friends and it is very time consuming.

I taxi carless friends around when they need it.

I recently looked after my friends three cats while she was away with work (a week) and they p1ssed everywhere so it was constant cleaning. She wants me to now have the cats as are too much for her current circumstances. I hate cats and only fed and watered them as a favour. I certainly don't want the buggers. I have only seen her once since she returned (mid June) and she only lives around the corner. Nice to have a thank you for looking after someones pets for a week I think. She also thought nothing of texting me a few times in the week to ask for additional favours...posting a parcel she'd forgotten etc (sounds easy but means finding parking in town, paying a quid to park, paying £9 postage which I'll never get back etc).

I am tired of not even getting a thank you for anything I do. AIBU. I feel like cutting off the lot of them but I don't have masses of friends and would be very much alone if I did!

Just say you don't want the cats, ffs! If she was away for long periods she should have put them in a cattery, instead of relying on you ten times. She's taking the piss. As are your other friends. People can only take the piss if you let them. So stop letting them. However, I know how hard it can be to tell people to get lost, even politely, so start with small things like 'No thanks, I don't want to have the cats. I hope you manage to rehome them elsewhere.'. Then build from that small success.

Dont engage with her about the cats. Ignore hints. If she asks outright, just say no or have you asked x, she loves cats.
Tbh, you are doing all the giving here and not receiving anything. Back away from these 'friends'.

eh?

just say no!

You are a complete pushover!

Why are you agonising over what to tell her about cats you don't want? Why say anything other than "no"? (Please tell you you have actually given them back now she's returned from holiday?)

Thanks everyone. Yes the cats have gone home!

I used to be a people-pleaser and used to agree to do anything for anyone. Then it dawned on me that no one respected me and I was often used by people. So I started saying no to people. It's hard initially but after a few times it is very liberating. It doesn't have to be rude, just a 'no I'm afraid I can't this time' works for me. Don't apologise, and don't over-explain when you say no, as this gives the other person leeway to make you feel 'guilty' or to talk you into it.

I did lose some friends when I refused to do favours, but clearly they were never proper friends anyway. True friends will respect your boundaries and your right to say 'no'

Just say you don't want cats for the same reasons she doesn't! And a few more too.

It doesn't have to be like this. You don't have to be a doormat and you don't have to flounce from all your friendships either. Please get yourself some books on assertiveness.

Thanks everyone.