To have actually found it [whispers] easier without DH around?

[Mummyof3tobe]

DH has been away for 4 days on a stag weekender. I was truly dreading it as I had to do all the child care singlehandedly all weekend for our two DCs and I was exhausted before I started after a long week as I'm expecting DC3.

However, it actually went very smoothly. DCs knew I was in charge, we did what I wanted , when I wanted and although tiring it is arguably easier than having someone else about not doing what I expect/want. (Spot the control freak).

I realise this is not the same as being a single parent full-time, but I wondered if anyone else feels this when their partner is away for short time?

Yep. Love my dh to bits but he's so noisy, and he winds the kids up at bedtime so they're harder to settle. I find that, overall things run more smoothly when he's away (not to say that I don't want him to come back!) Definitely nothing like being a single parent though.

Yep love it when dh is on afternoons the house runs like a well oiled machine.

However I get Lonley and crave adult conversation.

Oh yeah.
Do tings a little bit differently when he works late/away. But it's always fine.

Somehow we get out of the house on school days far more smoothly without him than if he has a day off and can 'help'.
Think the TV gets switched on and then it all goes pearshaped!

Totally agree... DP plays football on a Wednesday and goes straight there from work, so he doesn't get in until after ds is in bed. I do actually find this easier than the nights he is here (although openly admit I wouldn't choose to do it every night!!) the house is a lot calmer, cleaner, quieter and ds is usually in bed early win win win

DP left 2 weeks ago to work in another country, and DS has been so much easier to manage. I don't know if it's because I've been worrying and so making an effort to spend more time with him, because I know I don't have backup so am on some level making more of an effort not to make things harder for myself in the long run, or whether it's just easier for DS knowing that one person is in charge and having nobody to be played off against each other

I was a single parent for a year before DP moved in and it was pretty much like this although I haven't hit the part where I'm deathly tired and DS is in an awful mood and I just need someone to come and take him away from me yet. Am sure it will come

My DH worked away during the week for 8 weeks when we first moved down here.

I actually found it a lot easier - house stayed tidier, kids behaved better

Although wouldn't want it long term :)

Yes!

Absolutely.

Should I feel bad about that?

Oh well.

Phew, it's not just me then! I have to admit I slightly questioned the dynamic of our relationship given this new insight.

I think it is partly that I prefer being in control, I also lift my game (make more of an effort with the DCs and forced to be more patient) and I lower my standards. We had take away pizza for dinner on Sat eve and I didn't feel remotely guilty as I couldn't possibly be expecting to COOK on top of everything else!

I have vaguely fantasied over the weekend about a new relationship with DH (who I do adore) - we live apart, I have DCs with me, he pays bills, he has children every other weekend for visits (while I have lie ins and see girlfriends at the movies, brunch, etc), DH and I date like we did in the early days and have hot sex. It requires more money to fund these two households and all the hot dates, but aside from that it seems perfect!